Planet Preguoria, 10 Years Ago. Back when Samev’Annali was only 1 years old.
Samev’Annali: Come on…. Almost there……Just gotta connect one more wire… Aaaaaaaaand… Done!
After Samev’Annali connected the last wire to her robot’s newly installed hard drive, it was finally complete and ready to be activated.
Samev’Annali: Okay little guy, you can turn on now.
Samev’Annali then waited for her robot to turn on, but nothing was happening.
Samev’Annali: Please….. please….. Oh please, please, please turn on.
After waiting a few more seconds, Samev’Annali’s robot was fully operational and even opened up it’s single eye as it responded to her voice.
Samev’Annali: Yo-You’re Awake… You Work!…. You Actually Work!… Ahahahaha.
Samev’Annali jumped around and laughed as she was celebrating over the success of her very first invention coming to life.
Samev’Annali: Oh this is great. Can you talk too?
The Robot: A….. A……Aaaa.
Samev’Annali: Yes?
The Robot: Aaasbt….Asbt-t-t. Kdfaksctksrckiscksfksqdks…. Wspqlnvluhhhanmcvknsclk.
Samev’Annali: What?… Oh! I’m sorry. I must have forgotten to turn on your language communicator. Hold on a sec.
Samev’Annali quickly takes out a small screw driver to open the back part of her robot’s head and then presses a small blue button.
Samev’Annali: There that should do it. Go ahead and say something.
The Robot:…………………………………….
Samev’Annali: Hello? Can you still hear me?
The Robot: Affirmative… And greetings to you, My Creator.
Samev’Annali: Yes… YES! Hahahaha! This Is Great! I can’t believe I finally created my very first robot. Oh I can’t wait to show you to mom.
The Robot: Mom? Who is Mom? Is that the name of your creator?
Samev’Annali: Yyyyeeeah… Kinda… I mean she did create me, but not in the same way I created you. But we can talk about that later. As for now, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Samev’Annali and I welcome you to Preguoria. Your New Home.
The Robot: Home?…… This room is Preguoria? My New Home?
Samev’Annali: Not even close. This room is only a small fracture of Preguoria. Preguoria is an entire planet filled with all kinds of organic lifeforms. Including the race that rules it, which are The Preguopians. Although I assume you already know that.
The Robot: Affirmative. As we speak, I am collecting a large amount of information that you have provided for me in my new data-drive… This is what you would call “Informational” correct?
Samev’Annali: Correct.
The Robot: However I am having trouble searching for a certain file that I can not seem to obtain.
Samev’Annali: Oh? And what’s that?
The Robot: The file that contains the information about my existence….. If I may be so forward with you creator? I am curious to ask why you have created me? What is my purpose for me being here with you as of now?
After hearing what her invention just said to her, Samev’Annali stood there in silence for a few seconds and then said-
Samev’Annali: Well….. I was hoping if you could be my friend?
The Robot:…….. Friend?
The Robot then takes a few seconds to look up the definition of the word “Friend” through the Preguopian’s language encyclopedia, which was stored in it’s data hard-drive.
The Robot: Search Complete… The word “Friend”. Noun. A person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations…….
Hmmm…. Creator? Is it considered logical or even normal for someone like you to be friends with something like me? So far I have only existed for about a minute and a half and yet you already want to be my friend. It is even possible that I could be your friend?
Samev’Annali: Well…. I don’t see why not. I mean I still hope you could be my friend. I ask because….. No one wants to be my friend…. Not even my own siblings want to be my friends. They’re all usually too busy with their own things to even notice me. So I just thought that if I couldn’t make a friend, then I could just build one instead.
The Robot: Well if that is the case creator… Then I fully accept your offer in becoming your new friend.
Samev’Annali: Really!?!
The Robot: Affirmative. By all means, you created me and have given me the gift of life. So it only makes sense that in exchange I will give you my hand in- What’s the word?… Friendship?
Samev’Annali: YAY!!!
Samev’Annali was so overwhelmed with joy that she gave her new creation a hug.
The Robot: Creator? Why are you squeezing me? Did I do something wrong?
Samev’Annali: No silly, this is called a hug. This is what friends do when they show affection towards one another.
The Robot: A hug you say?…… This is…. Acceptable.
Samev’Annali: It better be. Now come on, I wanna show you to my mom and the rest of my family. And who knows maybe they’ll become friends with you too.
The Robot: Oh Creator…Please… I do not wish to be intrusive… Or a nuisance.
Samev’Annali: Hey! You will never be a nuisance to me. You’re my friend. My Robot Friend that is.
The Robot: Robot Friend?
Samev’Annali: Yeah Robot Friend. It means you’re my robot and my friend.
The Robot: Robot Friend… Hm? This is also acceptable.
Samev’Annali: Good. Now come on, I think everyone would like to meet you if you give them a chance. And I think you’d like them too.
The Robot: If you say so creator.
Samev’Annali: Oh and one more thing, no need to keep calling me “Creator”. Just call me Samev’Annali.
The Robot: Affirmative. And what would you like to call me Crea- I mean Samev’Annali?
Samev’Annali: Oh Pooh I Forgot! I didn’t even give you a name yet. Hm….. Eh I’ll come up with one for you later. As for now, just follow me down this hallway, my family should- Oops I mean Our family should be on the other side. You coming?
The Robot: Affirmative… Samev’Annali.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Planet Earth, 11 Years Later.
The sun rises on another beautiful day as we begin our story with-
TAG: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
With TAG being engulfed in flames as he jumps out the window and lands face first into the shallow end of the backyard pool….. Again…… Yup that’s right everybody, this is how we’re gonna start off the second part of the first chapter… Did you really expect it to be anything different?!
TAG: Phew… Well that’s the last time I try to make my own homemade fireworks. You know I really should start making blue prints of these things before I just jump right into them….. And use glue instead of microwaved chewing gum.
As TAG walks out of the pool, dries himself off and screws his head back into place, he then noticed something was off.
TAG: Huh? That’s weird. Usually this is the time when Samev’Annali comes down here and starts hitting me in the head with a frying pan. What gives?
TAG went back into the house to try and find Samev’Annali, only to find her, Sam, Heather, The Twins, Martha & Peggy in the living room, looking at a whole bunch of framed photos on the wall.
TAG: Hey there everyone, what’s a… What’s all this about?
Samev’Annali: Oh… Hey TAG. We’re looking at our new wall of family photos that was formed into this uh… What did you call it again Grandma?
Peggy: A collage sweetie.
Samev’Annali: Oh right, a collage piece that Grandma & Mama Heather made for us. It’s all the pictures of us throughout the years that we’ve been on Earth. Pretty cool huh?
As TAG looks at the collage he notices a lot of family photos that he has never even seen before.
TAG: You guys took a vacation to Hawaii?
Samev’Annali: Well of course, weren’t yo-… Oh wait.
Sam: Oh yeah wasn’t that the year when you got kidnapped by those Colombian drug lords?
TAG: Yes! As a matter of fact it was! Thanks a lot for finally noticing! I mean sure I eventually escaped, freed the other captives, destroyed the empire single handedly and then found my way back home by sneaking on to a passing cargo ship, but still it would have been nice to have gotten some assistance.
Samev’Annali: Yeah sorry about that, I mean I would’ve helped, but the twins wanted to make sand castles with me and I just couldn’t skip out on that.
TAG: You guys made sand castles?
Samev’Annali: We sure did. And boy was it one heck of a great time.
Heather: But not nearly as good as the time we all went to Disney Land.
Samev’Annali: Oh yeah.
TAG: Hey wait a minute! I remember going to Disney Land with you guys, how come I’m not in this photo? In fact where are any of the pictures of me? I don’t see me anywhere in this thing.
Heather: What? What are you talking about? You’re in this one. You’re just in the background…… Somewhere.
TAG: Where?
Heather: Uuuuuuuh… Uuuuuuuuuuuummm….. There! Right there. Isn’t that you in the far left, between the water fountain and the cotton candy shop?
TAG: There?
Heather: Yeah There.
TAG: That is a Fucking Gum Ball Machine!
Heather: Oh… Huh… Well it looks like you from a far.
Sam: Don’t worry TAG, I’m sure we can add in some pictures of you on to the collage later today. Or you know, whenever we have the time for it.
Heather: Oh speaking of time, I gotta head down to the grocery store and stock up for the next week. Are we still good on toilet paper?
Sam: I think so. And as for me, I gotta head down to Home Depot and see if I can find a new pipe piece for our broken sink.
Martha: I gotta head off to my book club soon or else I’ll be late.
Samev’Annali: And as for me and Grandma, we’re gonna go back to her place and help Pop pop Joseph move his new sofa into the living room. Ready Grandma?
Peggy: I sure am kiddo, let me just grab the twins and then we can go.
TAG: Hey Wait! Before any of you guys go. Would anyone mind if I uh… TAGGED along with you? Haha see what I did there?
Heather: NO!…… Uh-uh I mean uh, no thank you TAG I-I-I’m quite fine with just me going by myself. It just helps me get things done a lot quicker. Plus all that extra grocery carrying is good exercise. Oh look at the time, I gotta get going, bye.
With in one minute, Heather grabbed her keys and purse, ran straight to her car and drove away.
Sam: Yeah and Uhhh….. I need to be alone for this errand because I’m a… Going to a wedding afterwards. Bye.
Sam then grabbed his keys and ran out the door.
Martha: And I uh…… Have Diarrhea! Bye!
Martha then opened a window and jumped out of it.
After being rejected three times, TAG then turned his head towards Samev’Annali & Peggy.
Peggy: Well if everyone else is busy, I don’t see why you can’t-
Samev’Annali: UH! Actually Grandma I think it would be best if it was just you, me and the twins for this one since uh… Grandpa Joseph has a lot of refrigerator magnets in his garage and you know how much that stuff messes with TAG’s brain.
TAG: Hey! That only happened twice! And I told you that I could totally pull off “I Love To Singa” if it weren’t for that head dent I got after that Uber driver hit me with his car last week. I’m usually off by just one note.
Samev’Annali: Whatever we just don’t need you for this TAG. So please just do us all a huge favor and stay home, stay out of trouble and try your VERY BEST not to burn the house down like you almost did this morning.
TAG: Oh so NOW you noticed.
Samev’Annali: How could I not, these walls aren’t exactly made of titanium if you haven’t noticed. And it’s not like I could just drop everything and check on you every time you’re screaming like a maniac. That’s all I’d be doing for the rest of my life until the day I die.
TAG: Well excuse me for trying to come up with something special for our up coming anniversary.
Samev’Annali: Anniversary?... What anniversary?
Once TAG heard that, he was instantly shocked and could not believe that Samev’Annali forgot about their anniversary.
TAG: The anniversary of the day you created me and we officially became friends.
After hearing that, Samev’Annali grew silent for a few seconds and then turned to Peggy.
Samev’Annali: Hey Grandma? I need some alone time with TAG. Can you please go grab the twins and then go wait for me in the car? This’ll only take a few minutes.
Peggy: Oh uh sure thing honey. Come on babies.
Peggy then picks up the twins and quickly walks out the door.
Samev’Annali: So uh….. When’s our anniversary again?
TAG: Tomorrow.
Samev’Annali: OH! Darn! I wish you didn’t say tomorrow. I’m so sorry buddy, but tomorrow I’m gonna be spending the whole day helping Martha pick out new pants for her to wear for her up coming bake sale. She wants to find pants that are both stylish and non-elastic, which will be a real challenge since that woman’s butt cheeks are practically the size of basketballs. Not to mention that belly of hers is gonna show off a major case of muffin top. That’s mean. Don’t tell her I said that. Any way can we reschedule it for uh-
Samev’Annali then takes out her phone and looks through her calendar to see when she’ll be free.
Samev’Annali: Two months from now?
TAG: Are You Kidding Me?! So let me get this straight? You would rather spend the whole day with a woman that you use to hate, instead of spending it with someone who has literally been there for you since you were one years old?
Samev’Annali: Well… I mean… When you put it like that… I uh-
TAG: That’s Messed Up Samev’Annali! That’s Real Messed Up!
Samev’Annali: Look I’m sorry TAG! But as the eldest child of the family I have a lot of responsibilities. This family would crumble with out me and it’s my job to keep it from crumbling. So please forgive me if I wish to spend more time with my Actual Family than with someone who makes wine in the bathroom sink, or resurrecting dead animals, or converts our backyard into a motorcycle rally, or causes a massive black out through out the entire neighborhood just to light up a stupid Christmas tree, or unleashes a wild wolverine in our house which led to most of us getting rabbi shots. Papa and Mama Heather are still having trouble sitting down thanks to you. And let’s not forget about the time you tried to stuff a rotting horse carcass into the down stairs closet.
TAG: Now what a minute! I can explain that one!
Samev’Annali: The Point Is TAG! You’re too much of a hand full and I need a break from you once in a while. And apparently tomorrow is one of those days. We can still celebrate our anniversary some other time alright.
TAG: But Samev’Annali I’m your friend… Your Robot Friend.
Samev’Annali: Yeah well you’ve been more of a Pain In The Ass than anything else.
After hearing what Samev’Annali just said to him, TAG was completely speechless.
Samev’Annali: Look I gotta go. I’ll be back later today and when I do this place still better be in one piece when I get back. Understood?
TAG:……………………….
Samev’Annali: Understood?!
TAG: Crystal.
Samev’Annali: Good… See ya.
Samev’Annali then walked out of the house without saying another word and closed the door behind her. Leaving TAG all alone, by himself, in their big empty house.
As Samev’Annali gets into her Grandmother’s car and buckles herself into the passengers seat, Peggy then looks at her and says “Is he going to be okay?”
Samev’Annali: Of course he is, he’s made of titanium and wires after all. He’s no softy. Besides he’s been through much worse than this. Now let’s get going, Pop pop Joseph is waiting.
Peggy: Alright then.
Peggy then starts the engine and drives away.
We then cut to TAG who’s sitting alone on the couch, looking out the window and preparing himself to sing a sad song.
TAG: I guess this is it… I always wished that this day would never come, but it has. She doesn’t want to be my friend anymore.
🎶….. When I was her robot friend and our lives were new and free.
She thought I was as lovable as the stars themselves were bright.
When I was her robot friend, every day was a carnival, every night an adventure, and the twilight as the same.
Through the winter and the spring, we'd make a game of everything.
Chowing down on Cheeto puffs and watching Earth cable.
But now she's older, breaking free, she'd rather be with her Earth family.
I can't believe our special bond must break.
Now I'm not her robot friend, what we had must finally end.
I'm useless as a VCR set, inside a Gen Z’s room.
Now I'm not her robot friend! Emptiness is now my only friend!…
But liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife.
Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooes.
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnn. 🎶
TAG: Whelp! Now that I got that out of the way, I guess all I need to do now is start packing. Because as of today, at this very moment. TAG The Robot Is Running Away From Home and is never coming back! If no one loves me here, then there’s no reason for me to stay. Starting Now, I Have No Family!…..……… Now uh, where did I put my tic tacs & traveling sombrero?
To Be Continued…
Samev’Annali: Come on…. Almost there……Just gotta connect one more wire… Aaaaaaaaand… Done!
After Samev’Annali connected the last wire to her robot’s newly installed hard drive, it was finally complete and ready to be activated.
Samev’Annali: Okay little guy, you can turn on now.
Samev’Annali then waited for her robot to turn on, but nothing was happening.
Samev’Annali: Please….. please….. Oh please, please, please turn on.
After waiting a few more seconds, Samev’Annali’s robot was fully operational and even opened up it’s single eye as it responded to her voice.
Samev’Annali: Yo-You’re Awake… You Work!…. You Actually Work!… Ahahahaha.
Samev’Annali jumped around and laughed as she was celebrating over the success of her very first invention coming to life.
Samev’Annali: Oh this is great. Can you talk too?
The Robot: A….. A……Aaaa.
Samev’Annali: Yes?
The Robot: Aaasbt….Asbt-t-t. Kdfaksctksrckiscksfksqdks…. Wspqlnvluhhhanmcvknsclk.
Samev’Annali: What?… Oh! I’m sorry. I must have forgotten to turn on your language communicator. Hold on a sec.
Samev’Annali quickly takes out a small screw driver to open the back part of her robot’s head and then presses a small blue button.
Samev’Annali: There that should do it. Go ahead and say something.
The Robot:…………………………………….
Samev’Annali: Hello? Can you still hear me?
The Robot: Affirmative… And greetings to you, My Creator.
Samev’Annali: Yes… YES! Hahahaha! This Is Great! I can’t believe I finally created my very first robot. Oh I can’t wait to show you to mom.
The Robot: Mom? Who is Mom? Is that the name of your creator?
Samev’Annali: Yyyyeeeah… Kinda… I mean she did create me, but not in the same way I created you. But we can talk about that later. As for now, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Samev’Annali and I welcome you to Preguoria. Your New Home.
The Robot: Home?…… This room is Preguoria? My New Home?
Samev’Annali: Not even close. This room is only a small fracture of Preguoria. Preguoria is an entire planet filled with all kinds of organic lifeforms. Including the race that rules it, which are The Preguopians. Although I assume you already know that.
The Robot: Affirmative. As we speak, I am collecting a large amount of information that you have provided for me in my new data-drive… This is what you would call “Informational” correct?
Samev’Annali: Correct.
The Robot: However I am having trouble searching for a certain file that I can not seem to obtain.
Samev’Annali: Oh? And what’s that?
The Robot: The file that contains the information about my existence….. If I may be so forward with you creator? I am curious to ask why you have created me? What is my purpose for me being here with you as of now?
After hearing what her invention just said to her, Samev’Annali stood there in silence for a few seconds and then said-
Samev’Annali: Well….. I was hoping if you could be my friend?
The Robot:…….. Friend?
The Robot then takes a few seconds to look up the definition of the word “Friend” through the Preguopian’s language encyclopedia, which was stored in it’s data hard-drive.
The Robot: Search Complete… The word “Friend”. Noun. A person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations…….
Hmmm…. Creator? Is it considered logical or even normal for someone like you to be friends with something like me? So far I have only existed for about a minute and a half and yet you already want to be my friend. It is even possible that I could be your friend?
Samev’Annali: Well…. I don’t see why not. I mean I still hope you could be my friend. I ask because….. No one wants to be my friend…. Not even my own siblings want to be my friends. They’re all usually too busy with their own things to even notice me. So I just thought that if I couldn’t make a friend, then I could just build one instead.
The Robot: Well if that is the case creator… Then I fully accept your offer in becoming your new friend.
Samev’Annali: Really!?!
The Robot: Affirmative. By all means, you created me and have given me the gift of life. So it only makes sense that in exchange I will give you my hand in- What’s the word?… Friendship?
Samev’Annali: YAY!!!
Samev’Annali was so overwhelmed with joy that she gave her new creation a hug.
The Robot: Creator? Why are you squeezing me? Did I do something wrong?
Samev’Annali: No silly, this is called a hug. This is what friends do when they show affection towards one another.
The Robot: A hug you say?…… This is…. Acceptable.
Samev’Annali: It better be. Now come on, I wanna show you to my mom and the rest of my family. And who knows maybe they’ll become friends with you too.
The Robot: Oh Creator…Please… I do not wish to be intrusive… Or a nuisance.
Samev’Annali: Hey! You will never be a nuisance to me. You’re my friend. My Robot Friend that is.
The Robot: Robot Friend?
Samev’Annali: Yeah Robot Friend. It means you’re my robot and my friend.
The Robot: Robot Friend… Hm? This is also acceptable.
Samev’Annali: Good. Now come on, I think everyone would like to meet you if you give them a chance. And I think you’d like them too.
The Robot: If you say so creator.
Samev’Annali: Oh and one more thing, no need to keep calling me “Creator”. Just call me Samev’Annali.
The Robot: Affirmative. And what would you like to call me Crea- I mean Samev’Annali?
Samev’Annali: Oh Pooh I Forgot! I didn’t even give you a name yet. Hm….. Eh I’ll come up with one for you later. As for now, just follow me down this hallway, my family should- Oops I mean Our family should be on the other side. You coming?
The Robot: Affirmative… Samev’Annali.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Planet Earth, 11 Years Later.
The sun rises on another beautiful day as we begin our story with-
TAG: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
With TAG being engulfed in flames as he jumps out the window and lands face first into the shallow end of the backyard pool….. Again…… Yup that’s right everybody, this is how we’re gonna start off the second part of the first chapter… Did you really expect it to be anything different?!
TAG: Phew… Well that’s the last time I try to make my own homemade fireworks. You know I really should start making blue prints of these things before I just jump right into them….. And use glue instead of microwaved chewing gum.
As TAG walks out of the pool, dries himself off and screws his head back into place, he then noticed something was off.
TAG: Huh? That’s weird. Usually this is the time when Samev’Annali comes down here and starts hitting me in the head with a frying pan. What gives?
TAG went back into the house to try and find Samev’Annali, only to find her, Sam, Heather, The Twins, Martha & Peggy in the living room, looking at a whole bunch of framed photos on the wall.
TAG: Hey there everyone, what’s a… What’s all this about?
Samev’Annali: Oh… Hey TAG. We’re looking at our new wall of family photos that was formed into this uh… What did you call it again Grandma?
Peggy: A collage sweetie.
Samev’Annali: Oh right, a collage piece that Grandma & Mama Heather made for us. It’s all the pictures of us throughout the years that we’ve been on Earth. Pretty cool huh?
As TAG looks at the collage he notices a lot of family photos that he has never even seen before.
TAG: You guys took a vacation to Hawaii?
Samev’Annali: Well of course, weren’t yo-… Oh wait.
Sam: Oh yeah wasn’t that the year when you got kidnapped by those Colombian drug lords?
TAG: Yes! As a matter of fact it was! Thanks a lot for finally noticing! I mean sure I eventually escaped, freed the other captives, destroyed the empire single handedly and then found my way back home by sneaking on to a passing cargo ship, but still it would have been nice to have gotten some assistance.
Samev’Annali: Yeah sorry about that, I mean I would’ve helped, but the twins wanted to make sand castles with me and I just couldn’t skip out on that.
TAG: You guys made sand castles?
Samev’Annali: We sure did. And boy was it one heck of a great time.
Heather: But not nearly as good as the time we all went to Disney Land.
Samev’Annali: Oh yeah.
TAG: Hey wait a minute! I remember going to Disney Land with you guys, how come I’m not in this photo? In fact where are any of the pictures of me? I don’t see me anywhere in this thing.
Heather: What? What are you talking about? You’re in this one. You’re just in the background…… Somewhere.
TAG: Where?
Heather: Uuuuuuuh… Uuuuuuuuuuuummm….. There! Right there. Isn’t that you in the far left, between the water fountain and the cotton candy shop?
TAG: There?
Heather: Yeah There.
TAG: That is a Fucking Gum Ball Machine!
Heather: Oh… Huh… Well it looks like you from a far.
Sam: Don’t worry TAG, I’m sure we can add in some pictures of you on to the collage later today. Or you know, whenever we have the time for it.
Heather: Oh speaking of time, I gotta head down to the grocery store and stock up for the next week. Are we still good on toilet paper?
Sam: I think so. And as for me, I gotta head down to Home Depot and see if I can find a new pipe piece for our broken sink.
Martha: I gotta head off to my book club soon or else I’ll be late.
Samev’Annali: And as for me and Grandma, we’re gonna go back to her place and help Pop pop Joseph move his new sofa into the living room. Ready Grandma?
Peggy: I sure am kiddo, let me just grab the twins and then we can go.
TAG: Hey Wait! Before any of you guys go. Would anyone mind if I uh… TAGGED along with you? Haha see what I did there?
Heather: NO!…… Uh-uh I mean uh, no thank you TAG I-I-I’m quite fine with just me going by myself. It just helps me get things done a lot quicker. Plus all that extra grocery carrying is good exercise. Oh look at the time, I gotta get going, bye.
With in one minute, Heather grabbed her keys and purse, ran straight to her car and drove away.
Sam: Yeah and Uhhh….. I need to be alone for this errand because I’m a… Going to a wedding afterwards. Bye.
Sam then grabbed his keys and ran out the door.
Martha: And I uh…… Have Diarrhea! Bye!
Martha then opened a window and jumped out of it.
After being rejected three times, TAG then turned his head towards Samev’Annali & Peggy.
Peggy: Well if everyone else is busy, I don’t see why you can’t-
Samev’Annali: UH! Actually Grandma I think it would be best if it was just you, me and the twins for this one since uh… Grandpa Joseph has a lot of refrigerator magnets in his garage and you know how much that stuff messes with TAG’s brain.
TAG: Hey! That only happened twice! And I told you that I could totally pull off “I Love To Singa” if it weren’t for that head dent I got after that Uber driver hit me with his car last week. I’m usually off by just one note.
Samev’Annali: Whatever we just don’t need you for this TAG. So please just do us all a huge favor and stay home, stay out of trouble and try your VERY BEST not to burn the house down like you almost did this morning.
TAG: Oh so NOW you noticed.
Samev’Annali: How could I not, these walls aren’t exactly made of titanium if you haven’t noticed. And it’s not like I could just drop everything and check on you every time you’re screaming like a maniac. That’s all I’d be doing for the rest of my life until the day I die.
TAG: Well excuse me for trying to come up with something special for our up coming anniversary.
Samev’Annali: Anniversary?... What anniversary?
Once TAG heard that, he was instantly shocked and could not believe that Samev’Annali forgot about their anniversary.
TAG: The anniversary of the day you created me and we officially became friends.
After hearing that, Samev’Annali grew silent for a few seconds and then turned to Peggy.
Samev’Annali: Hey Grandma? I need some alone time with TAG. Can you please go grab the twins and then go wait for me in the car? This’ll only take a few minutes.
Peggy: Oh uh sure thing honey. Come on babies.
Peggy then picks up the twins and quickly walks out the door.
Samev’Annali: So uh….. When’s our anniversary again?
TAG: Tomorrow.
Samev’Annali: OH! Darn! I wish you didn’t say tomorrow. I’m so sorry buddy, but tomorrow I’m gonna be spending the whole day helping Martha pick out new pants for her to wear for her up coming bake sale. She wants to find pants that are both stylish and non-elastic, which will be a real challenge since that woman’s butt cheeks are practically the size of basketballs. Not to mention that belly of hers is gonna show off a major case of muffin top. That’s mean. Don’t tell her I said that. Any way can we reschedule it for uh-
Samev’Annali then takes out her phone and looks through her calendar to see when she’ll be free.
Samev’Annali: Two months from now?
TAG: Are You Kidding Me?! So let me get this straight? You would rather spend the whole day with a woman that you use to hate, instead of spending it with someone who has literally been there for you since you were one years old?
Samev’Annali: Well… I mean… When you put it like that… I uh-
TAG: That’s Messed Up Samev’Annali! That’s Real Messed Up!
Samev’Annali: Look I’m sorry TAG! But as the eldest child of the family I have a lot of responsibilities. This family would crumble with out me and it’s my job to keep it from crumbling. So please forgive me if I wish to spend more time with my Actual Family than with someone who makes wine in the bathroom sink, or resurrecting dead animals, or converts our backyard into a motorcycle rally, or causes a massive black out through out the entire neighborhood just to light up a stupid Christmas tree, or unleashes a wild wolverine in our house which led to most of us getting rabbi shots. Papa and Mama Heather are still having trouble sitting down thanks to you. And let’s not forget about the time you tried to stuff a rotting horse carcass into the down stairs closet.
TAG: Now what a minute! I can explain that one!
Samev’Annali: The Point Is TAG! You’re too much of a hand full and I need a break from you once in a while. And apparently tomorrow is one of those days. We can still celebrate our anniversary some other time alright.
TAG: But Samev’Annali I’m your friend… Your Robot Friend.
Samev’Annali: Yeah well you’ve been more of a Pain In The Ass than anything else.
After hearing what Samev’Annali just said to him, TAG was completely speechless.
Samev’Annali: Look I gotta go. I’ll be back later today and when I do this place still better be in one piece when I get back. Understood?
TAG:……………………….
Samev’Annali: Understood?!
TAG: Crystal.
Samev’Annali: Good… See ya.
Samev’Annali then walked out of the house without saying another word and closed the door behind her. Leaving TAG all alone, by himself, in their big empty house.
As Samev’Annali gets into her Grandmother’s car and buckles herself into the passengers seat, Peggy then looks at her and says “Is he going to be okay?”
Samev’Annali: Of course he is, he’s made of titanium and wires after all. He’s no softy. Besides he’s been through much worse than this. Now let’s get going, Pop pop Joseph is waiting.
Peggy: Alright then.
Peggy then starts the engine and drives away.
We then cut to TAG who’s sitting alone on the couch, looking out the window and preparing himself to sing a sad song.
TAG: I guess this is it… I always wished that this day would never come, but it has. She doesn’t want to be my friend anymore.
🎶….. When I was her robot friend and our lives were new and free.
She thought I was as lovable as the stars themselves were bright.
When I was her robot friend, every day was a carnival, every night an adventure, and the twilight as the same.
Through the winter and the spring, we'd make a game of everything.
Chowing down on Cheeto puffs and watching Earth cable.
But now she's older, breaking free, she'd rather be with her Earth family.
I can't believe our special bond must break.
Now I'm not her robot friend, what we had must finally end.
I'm useless as a VCR set, inside a Gen Z’s room.
Now I'm not her robot friend! Emptiness is now my only friend!…
But liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife.
Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooes.
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnn. 🎶
TAG: Whelp! Now that I got that out of the way, I guess all I need to do now is start packing. Because as of today, at this very moment. TAG The Robot Is Running Away From Home and is never coming back! If no one loves me here, then there’s no reason for me to stay. Starting Now, I Have No Family!…..……… Now uh, where did I put my tic tacs & traveling sombrero?
To Be Continued…
Category All / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Gender Any
Size 1126 x 1280px
Comments