Weird title right?
This song was meant to be a sort of representation of how it sometimes feels being inside my head. When I'm depressed, I'll find a reason to be unhappy, and then my brain will take that simple sentiment and villainize me for it. "How could you want more when you have so much? You're so much luckier than everyone else is. There are people struggling way more than you." And that, of course makes me feel worse. It makes me feel selfish and stupid. I invalidate my own pain by way of others' experiences. And in the end, just like the song, I'm silent. I shut myself off. I don't tell people what I'm feeling.
Since getting on medication for my ADHD, I don't have those days as often anymore. My head is clearer, I have more energy, and I don't feel selfish for not being happy with where I am. The truth is that I squandered a lot of opportunities I was given, and that's time I'm never going to get back. But the worst thing I can do for myself is dwell on the time I've lost and remain complacent with where I am in life. And more importantly, what I wanted wasn't really money or friends or a perfect relationship with my family. What I really wanted was a life free of the pain I was experiencing, and no one should ever feel selfish for wanting that.
So yeah, that's why I called it "This". Because /this/, *waves hands at the song*, is what I wanted more than. Super pretentious, I know. :3
Thank you for listening, and for reading. I hope you like the song. I could have done more with it, but I was out of time, and I still think it's a banger besides.
This song was meant to be a sort of representation of how it sometimes feels being inside my head. When I'm depressed, I'll find a reason to be unhappy, and then my brain will take that simple sentiment and villainize me for it. "How could you want more when you have so much? You're so much luckier than everyone else is. There are people struggling way more than you." And that, of course makes me feel worse. It makes me feel selfish and stupid. I invalidate my own pain by way of others' experiences. And in the end, just like the song, I'm silent. I shut myself off. I don't tell people what I'm feeling.
Since getting on medication for my ADHD, I don't have those days as often anymore. My head is clearer, I have more energy, and I don't feel selfish for not being happy with where I am. The truth is that I squandered a lot of opportunities I was given, and that's time I'm never going to get back. But the worst thing I can do for myself is dwell on the time I've lost and remain complacent with where I am in life. And more importantly, what I wanted wasn't really money or friends or a perfect relationship with my family. What I really wanted was a life free of the pain I was experiencing, and no one should ever feel selfish for wanting that.
So yeah, that's why I called it "This". Because /this/, *waves hands at the song*, is what I wanted more than. Super pretentious, I know. :3
Thank you for listening, and for reading. I hope you like the song. I could have done more with it, but I was out of time, and I still think it's a banger besides.
Category Music / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Gender Male
Size 120 x 90px
The contrast between the two sections of the song is really great! And I really feel your story and emotions throughout the track. A banger indeed.
This is a very solid track. The lyrics are very fitting and strong with the theme, with a liberating tone and style. Good luck to us all in the contest :)
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