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It's been a year since an anonymous stranger got help with his Biology from the SpongeBob squirrel Sandy Cheeks. Now Sandy is feeling generous and decides to give the stranger a tour of everything in the Solar System which would soon be the greatest experience of his lifetime. They'll be exploring the canyons of Mars, fighting aliens on the Moon and snowboarding on Pluto.
Enjoy!
Sandy Cheeks - Nickelodeon and Stephen Hillenburg (R.I.P.)
*In a cartoon world, somewhere in the USA, an anonymous young man is looking at the night sky through a telescope from his house. He is the same anonymous guy who was assisted a month ago by a certain Texan squirrel scientist.*
Anon: Hmm... Let's see. Stars. *points the telescope in another direction* Stars. *points it to yet another direction* Stars and more stars. *sighs* I'm so bored, I can't concentrate. *gasps* That star moved! *looks through the telescope again* Oh, it's just a helicopter. I was expecting to look at a planet tonight. I guess I can't. *finds a book on astronomy* Maybe this book will have some answers.
*Anon reads the book for a few minutes before feeling bored again*
Anon: Man. Astronomy is so boring. And I'm expecting another science test next month. The sky may be great to look at, but there could be more out there. *puts the book down and lies in bed* There has to be something that can make studying astronomy fun and exciting. Anything! *lies his head on a pillow*
*Anon suddenly hears his Interdimensional Phone ringing*
Anon: Must be my mother.
*Anon picks up the phone*
Anon: No, mother. I don't need any more- Oh. Hi, Sandy.
*In the SpongeBob universe, inside the Treedome, the Texas-born scientist Sandy Cheeks is calling Anon with an Interdimensional Phone of her own. She is in her signature purple and green bikini*
Sandy: Howdy, pardner. How's it goin'?
Anon: It's going great. I just got an A+ on my anatomy test and it's all thanks to the tour you gave me months ago. And that tour where I met SpongeBob and all your friends. So... how are you feeling today?
Sandy: Pretty good, 'cept that SpongeBob has a busy shift at the Krusty Krab and has no time fer karate right now. *sighs* I'm as bored as a jackrabbit waitin' fer a bus in the city of Dallas.
Anon: I feel your pain. I've got an astronomy test next month and I'm tired of looking through a telescope and reading a book on outer space. If only there's a way to make it more interesting.
*A lightbulb flies over Sandy's head*
Sandy: HOT DIGGITY! I got an idea that'll solve both our problems!
Anon: Lemme hear it, Miss Cheeks.
Sandy: How 'bout you and me go on a trip ta outer space?
Anon: SPACE?! Where all the stars and planets live?
Sandy: Yup.
Anon: All right! This is gonna be awesome! Let me pack some stuff first. It's gonna be a long day!
*Anon puts down the phone and packs up some of his stuff into a suitcase. Once done packing, he picks up the suitcase and the Interdimensional Phone*
Anon: Okay! I'm ready! Cue teleportation!
*The Interdimensional Phone sucks in Anon and he is teleported to the Treedome with his suitcase in his hand. He stands in front of Sandy*
Sandy: Welcome back, pardner!
*Anon has an eager look on his face*
Sandy: My! Ya look as happy as a clam in high tide!
Anon: Is it true? Am I actually going to space with you?
Sandy: That's right! *pulls down a chart of the Solar System* You and me are gonna explore all the planets of the Solar System!
Anon: *points out some of the planets in the chart* Wow! There's a red planet, another one with rings and one that is blue as the sea! Wonderful! *feels himself over* Uh... I haven't got a spacesuit.
Sandy: Oops! I almost forgot! *gives Anon a spacesuit he can wear* Here ya go.
Anon: Thanks, Sandy.
*Sandy puts on her spacesuit and her helmet with the flower on it*
Sandy: No problem, pardner. Now if ya excuse me, I'm gonna go power up my spaceship. Meet me outside once ya put on yer suit.
Anon: Okay!
*Sandy walks out of the Treedome with two suitcases, one for her guitar and the other for the rest of her things. Anon puts on his spacesuit and helmet. Anon's suit looks similar to Sandy's, except it doesn't have an acorn symbol and the helmet has no flower. Anon looks all over himself*
Anon: Nice. Fits perfectly, just like the suit I went into her body with.
*Anon picks up his suitcase and runs out of the Treedome*
Anon: Bikini Bottom sure is looking good today.
*Anon turns around and catches sight of Sandy's new spaceship*
Anon: Whoa!
*Sandy appears beside him*
Sandy: Whatdya think of my space wagon?
Anon: It's impressive. A true work of science.
Sandy: Why thank you, pardner. Let's go!
*Anon and Sandy run into the spaceship. When inside, Anon sets his suitcase down. Anon and Sandy sit in the two seats facing the windshield. Sandy checks to see that everything is in order*
Sandy: Just some last-minute readings... and there! We're all charged up and ready ta go! Buckle up!
*Anon tries to fasten his seatbelt*
Anon: *grunts* Why you! Come on. *grunts*
Sandy: Uh, everything okay, pardner?
Anon: Almost got it! *fastens his seatbelt* There!
Sandy: Beginnin' countdown! Ten.
Anon: Nine!
Sandy: Eight!
Anon: Seven!
Sandy: Six!
Anon: Five!
Sandy: Four!
Anon: Three!
Sandy: Two!
Anon: One!
Sandy: Launch!
*Sandy accidentally hits the 'Lunch' button*
Sandy: Ugh! Lunch again! *hits the launch button*
*The spaceship begins to shake and is about to launch into outer space. Moments later, the spaceship blasts off. At the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob is seen flipping Krabby Patties until a rumble from the spaceship interrupts his fry cooking. He looks through the window and sees the spaceship taking off*
SpongeBob: Ooh. Looks like Sandy's going away for the day. That'll give me time to practice my new karate moves.
*SpongeBob steps back into the kitchen. Squidward is seen napping at the cash register*
Squidward: Wake me when I care.
*At Patrick's rock, Patrick sees the spaceship going up*
Patrick: Wow. I must be dreaming.
*Patrick's rock slams shut. Meanwhile, back in the spaceship.*
Anon: Boy! This is gonna be a fun space trip! Right, Sandy? Uh, Sandy?
*Sandy looks at a clipboard*
Sandy: Uh, I'm kinda busy right now, pardner.
Anon: I see.
Sandy: Prepare yerself fer the afterburners!
Anon: What?
*Sandy activates the afterburners, causing the spaceship to propel faster and shoot out of the ocean. Their heads are pushed to the back of the helmets by the speed.*
Sandy: Hold on, pardner! We're crossin' the stratosphere! Now we're goin' through the mesosphere! Enterin' the magnetosphere!
Anon: And coming out through the exosphere!
*The spaceship finally makes it to outer space*
Anon: I'm witnessing it before my very eyes. The wonders of space.
Sandy: *turns off the spaceship's engines* Okay, pardner. Yer free ta move 'round!
*Anon takes off his belt and begins floating around*
Anon: Whoa! *laughs* I'm weightless! Light as a feather! *pretends to swim and spins around* Zero gravity is awesome!
Sandy: *chuckles* Havin' fun back there?
Anon: You bet!
*Anon's peace is disturbed when something hits the spaceship*
Anon: What the?! Something hit us!
Sandy: Oh no! We got space junk! Back in yer seat! Yer mama won't save ya now!
*Anon gets back in his seat and fastens his seatbelt. Sandy reactivates the engines and drives the spaceship through the space junk.*
Anon: Man! Whoever left all this floating around must be one filthy slob.
*The spaceship continues getting hit by space junk. Anon and Sandy witness something glowing ahead of them*
Sandy: *gasps* We're goin' through the radiation belt! That could cause mutations!
Anon: Mutations?! I'm too handsome to be a freak!
Sandy: Get under yer lead blanket!
*Sandy and Anon take cover under lead blankets as the spaceship passes through the radiation belt. Once it emerged from the radiation belt, Sandy uncovers herself*
Sandy: It's all safe now, pardner!
Anon: *uncovers himself* Phew! That was close. Let the tour begin!
*The spaceship turns around and goes toward the Sun*
Sandy: Right now, we're headin' fer the Sun!
Anon: The star of the show. Much like Patrick Star, huh?
Sandy: *laughs* No, silly. Patrick's a sea star! This here's a real star!
Anon: Gotcha!
*Sandy stops the spaceship at a safe distance from the Sun. She and Anon are wearing special goggles to protect their eyes from the Sun's light*
Anon: Wow! It's a giant ball of hot gas!
Sandy: The Sun, like any other star, makes its energy through somethin' called nuclear fusion.
Anon: Neat. If remember correctly, it happens when hydrogen atoms fuse together to form helium.
Sandy: That's right, pardner. The Sun's light brightens our day and keeps us alive.
Anon: Yeah. If it weren't for the Sun, none of us would be here right now! *takes another look at the Sun* Holy moly! It's massive! I wonder how many Earths can fit inside it?
Sandy: Over a million!
Anon: A million Earths? Gosh! *sees some dark spots on the Sun* Someone's got an acne problem.
Sandy: *chuckles* Those are sunspots! They're cooler than anywhere else on the Sun.
Anon: But they're still extremely hot, at over 6500 degrees Fahrenheit!
*Anon notices something happening on the Sun's surface*
Anon: Wait a minute. This doesn't seem right. Take a look at this.
*Sandy takes a look at the Sun. She then screams in a similar tone to the time SpongeBob and Patrick shaved her bald.*
Anon: What is it, Sandy?
Sandy: A SOLAR FLARE'S COMIN' STRAIGHT FOR US!
Anon: Solar flare?! OH NO! It'll corrupt the electronics of this spaceship!
Sandy: We're doomed!
Anon: I guess this is it!
*The Sun blasts out a solar flare as Anon and Sandy huddle together. Luckily, the flare misses the spaceship and Earth as well.*
Anon: Phew! I'm glad it missed us. Solar flares can be really terrifying.
*The heat generated by the Sun hits the ship and things start to get too hot. Anon and Sandy begin to pant and sweat*
Anon: *panting* Is it just me or it is getting hot around here?
*The Sun continues warming up the spaceship. Back on the ship, Anon is in his shirt and pants and tries to cool down by fanning himself with his hand. On the other side, Sandy is in her bikini, panting heavily and fanning herself with her tail*
Anon: *panting* I... think... we went... too close.
Sandy: *panting* It's high time we hightail it away from this fireball!
*Sandy takes control and pilots the spaceship away from the Sun. They have their suits and helmets back on*
Anon: Gee. The Sun is some star. *looks both ways* By the way. How are stars, like the Sun, born?
Sandy: Funny ya should ask that. *brings down a computer which shows a simulation of star birth* It's very simple, pardner. A star is created in a cloud of space dust known as a nebula. A nebula is so big that its size is measured in light years. *looks at Anon* Are ya gettin' all this?
Anon: *nods* Uh huh.
Sandy: Inside a nebula, a cloud of gas and dust collapses under its own gravity and it creates a core.
Anon: Interesting.
Sandy: As time goes on, the core heats up 'til it becomes hot enough ta start nuclear fusion.
Anon: And just like that, a star is born. *thinks for a bit* Unfortunately, stars don't last forever. But what happens to them when they, as you might say, 'head for the last roundup'?
*The star birth simulation changes into a star death simulation*
Sandy: Well, pardner. The way a star ends its life depends on its size. When a star the size of the Sun runs out of gas, it grows into a red giant. It then sheds its skin and becomes what we scientists call a 'planetary nebula'. And last but not least, the star shrinks down into a white dwarf. Some day, the Sun will go through this stage. But don't fret none! It'll never happen in our lives!
Anon: Ooh! You had me worried there, Sandra. But what happens to stars bigger than the Sun?
Sandy: Well. Big stars end their lives in fantastic style! When they grow ta red supergiants, they keep on fusin' atoms 'til the core is nothin' but iron. The iron core then collapses under pressure and the whole star explodes into a supernova! KER-POW!!
Anon: *sees the supernova on the computer* Whoa!
Sandy: A supernova usually leaves behind a neutron star. But it doesn't always happen. Some big stars leave behind the scariest thing in outer space... a black hole!
Anon: *sees the black hole on the computer* Yipe!
Sandy: The gravity of a black hole is so strong, nothin' can escape it! Not even light! Once ya cross the event horizon, it's all over!
*The computer goes back up*
Anon: Boy, black holes are spooky. But nebulae, on the other hand, make for some beautiful pictures. Speaking of which, do you mind if I look for some through the telescope?
Sandy: Sure, why not?
*Anon looks through the telescope*
Anon: Hmm... *turns the telescope in multiple directions* There's the Orion, the Horsehead, the Helix, the Ring, the Eagle, the Dumbbell, the Bubble, the Lagoon, the Cat's Eye and the Hourglass. Wait a sec! *finds a nebula shaped like Texas* Hey, Sandy. I found one that looks like Texas!
*Sandy looks through the telescope and sees the nebula*
Sandy: Well tan my fur! Looks like ya found the Texas Nebula!
Anon: Really? Sweet! Discovering a nebula will definitely get me a high grade. *sees a planet coming in closer* Uh, I think we're approaching something round and rocky.
Sandy: That there's Mercury. The first planet from the Sun and our first stop!
Anon: Hold on. We're landing on this thing? Cool!
*The spaceship heads for Mercury and lands on its surface. Sandy and Anon exit the spaceship and take a look around Mercury.*
es
Sandy: And here we are! On the surface of Mercury!
Anon: Wow! I've never been somewhere like this before!
*Anon and Sandy each take a picture of Mercury's surface with their cameras. Anon then skips along and discovers that he is lighter than on Earth*
Anon: Whoa. I feel lighter than I do on good ol' Earth.
Sandy: That's 'cause, scientifically speakin', Mercury is smaller than Earth. And that means there's less gravity pullin' ya down.
Anon: Oh I see.
Sandy: And another scientific fact: Mercury is too small ta have an atmosphere, therefore there's no wind and no air fer us ta breathe.
Anon: *frustrated* Drat! I shouldn't had packed my kite! *lands back on the surface* Jumping is so fun on Mercury. Hey, Sandy. I bet I can jump higher than you!
Sandy: Yer on, pardner!
*Sandy and Anon jump high above the surface of Mercury*
Anon: WAHOO!
Sandy: Yeehaw! This is as fun as watchin' a rodeo!
*They land back on the surface. Anon notices all the craters*
Anon: Look at all these marks on the surface!
Sandy: Golly! Mercury looks more busted than one of my opponents after a karate match!
Anon: It's just like the Moon, only bigger. Pretty amazing for a planet that shares a name with a poisonous liquid metal. *takes a look at the craters* Hey, how about a race around these craters?
*Sandy and Anon begin running on Mercury's surface, around the craters*
Anon: It makes me wonder what kind of force made all this.
*Sandy moves ahead of Anon*
Sandy: *laughs* Betcha can't keep up with me, slowpoke!
Anon: Ha! Eat my Mercury dust!
*Sandy and Anon continue running and jumping over the small craters until Anon trips on a space rock.*
Anon: Ouch!
Sandy: *runs to Anon* You okay, pardner?
Anon: I guess so. *looks at the space rock* That's what I tripped over.
Sandy: *gasps* It's a meteorite. Interestin' science fact; space rocks smaller than asteroids are known as meteoroids and when they *punches her own hand* smash into a planet, they're called meteorites.
Anon: Meteoroid, meteorite. It's the whole lava magma situation all over again. Wait. Meteorite. That explains everything. Since Mercury has no atmosphere like you said earlier, it's vulnerable to being pelted by meteorites. That's why it's covered with craters. *smiles* What do you call a space rock that hits the planet in the opposite direction?
Sandy: What?
Anon: A meteorLEFT!
*A rimshot plays. Anon and Sandy laugh.*
Sandy: Yer about as funny as ears on an acorn!
Anon: I know!
*They continue laughing. Anon stops laughing when he looks up and sees a meteoroid heading for them*
Anon: Huh? *sees the meteoroid coming in closer* Look out!
*Anon jumps on top of Sandy to push her out of the meteoroid's path before it hits the surface*
Sandy: *gets up* What in tarnation was that for?!
Anon: Hey! I saved your life. That meteoroid was coming straight for us!
Sandy: Yeah. But ya didn't have ta push me!
Anon: Sorry, Sandy. Let's look at that meteorite that just crashed here.
*Anon and Sandy take a look at the medium-sized meteorite*
Anon: Wow! Would you look at that!
Sandy: Shee-yoot! That meteorite's as big as a Texas T-bone!
Anon: Fascinating. Hey! How about we each take a sample of this space rock? I can keep one as a souvenir and you can keep one for further study.
Sandy: Great idea, pardner! That's thinkin' like a scientist!
*Anon uses a pickaxe to chip off small rocks from the meteorite. Anon picks one up and Sandy picks one as well*
Anon: This would go great with my rock collection.
*Things start to go dark on Mercury*
Anon: Hey. Did someone turn out the lights?
Sandy: Oh no! It's gettin' dark!
Anon: That's bad, isn't it?
Sandy: Darn right it is! Without an atmosphere, Mercury can't keep its warmth!
Anon: *gasps* That means it's hot in the day and cold at night!
*Sandy and Anon are in the darkness of Mercury and start to feel cold*
Anon: *shivering* I-I-I-I th-th-th-think we s-s-s-stayed here l-l-long enough.
Sandy: *shivering* W-w-w-we b-b-better get back t-t-t-ta the ship.
*Anon and Sandy run out of the shade and back into the spaceship before taking off from Mercury and progressing to the next planet.*
Sandy: Brace yerself, pardner. We're gettin' close ta Venus.
*Anon gets a view of Venus*
Anon: Ooh. The second planet from the Sun.
*Anon takes a picture of the planet with his camera. The spaceship gets too close to Venus and its gravity begins to pull it down*
Sandy: Mayday! Mayday! We're goin' down!
Anon: Aagh! We're gonna crash!
*Anon and Sandy scream as the spaceship falls to Venus' surface before Sandy takes the helm and lands the ship safely. The human and squirrel then exit the ship and take a first look at Venus' volcanic landscape before they each take a picture with their cameras*
Anon: Whoa! Venus sure looks different on the surface. That's probably because we only saw its clouds from space. *looks left and right* So many volcanoes! Thank goodness they're still sleeping.
*Anon jumps up and down*
Anon: Hey! This place has Earth's gravity! I weigh much more than on Mercury.
Sandy: Scientifically speakin', it's 'cause Venus is almost the same size as our home planet.
Anon: Interesting. And with all these clouds, it would be a great place to live on. Don't you think, Miss Cheeks?
*Sandy is shocked after hearing what Anon said about Venus*
Sandy: Live on Venus?! I hate ta precipitate on yer party, but that's impossible!
Anon: Why? Don't Venus and Earth both have an atmosphere?
Sandy: They do, but that's where the similarities END! Venus is an evil planet! With a hot surface, extreme weather and a high atmospheric pressure, nothin' can survive here!
Anon: High atmospheric pressure? *worried* Are you sure our suits are saving us from getting crushed like tin cans?
Sandy: Course they are. As long as we keep 'em on, we should be safe.
Anon: Phew. That's a relief. Now about the surface temperature. How hot can it get on this planet?
Sandy: Up ta 900 degrees! Venus is hotter than a barbeque on asphalt in the middle of August!
Anon: 900 degrees? That's hot enough to melt lead! *thinks* If I remember correctly, it's caused by a greenhouse effect that's also affecting the Earth. I fear that Earth may one day end up like Venus, unless everyone stops polluting. *looks down on a Venusian rock* Hey! A genuine Venus rock. *picks it up* You're going straight into my collection, little guy. And here's one for you. *gives another rock to Sandy*
Sandy: Uh, thanks?
*The clouds on Venus begin to roll over and the wind starts to pick up*
Anon: Oh goody. Some rain will cool down this fiery death trap.
Sandy: 'Cept the fact it's sulfuric acid and not water!
Anon: *nervously* Now I'm terrified.
*A lightning bolt comes from the clouds and zaps Anon and Sandy, leaving them both fried.*
Anon: I'm glad we survived that one. That would had usually killed us!
*The sulfuric acid rain starts coming down*
Anon: I think now's the good time to-
Sandy: RUN LIKE HECK!
*They run back to the spaceship*
Anon: *panting* That was close!
Sandy: Yeah. *looks at her tail with a few burns on it and gasps* My beautiful tail!
Anon: Don't worry, Sandy. You'll walk it off. Now let's get off this stupid planet! *muttering* So much for the planet of love.
*The spaceship takes off from Venus. Anon puts his Venus rock alongside his piece of the Mercury meteorite.*
Anon: I don't EVER wanna go back there! With that kind of heat and weather, it's never a good place to take a vacation!
*Moments later, the spaceship enters the orbit of Earth.*
Sandy: There it is. The Earth.
*Anon takes a picture of the Earth with his camera*
Anon: The third planet. It looks amazing from here. Hmm... What makes this world special and why do we call it home?
Sandy: It's simple, pardner. The Earth's in the right place in the Solar System where it's not too hot and not too cold. It's also got an atmosphere with air that's easy fer us ta breathe.
Anon: There's also the water. We certainly can't live without that! *looks at the Earth again* Earth's the only planet that can support life *quietly* to date. And yet there is so much going on down there. It has tornadoes, hurricanes, earthquakes, volcanoes, tidal waves and those dazzling lights seen in the polar regions. I believe they're called 'aurora'.
*The spaceship passes the Earth and makes way for the Moon*
Sandy: Next stop: the Moon!
Anon: The Moon? Sweet!
*The spaceship lands on the Moon's surface before Sandy and Anon exit.*
Sandy: It's one small step fer a squirrel.
Anon: And one giant leap for humankind!
*They continue walking on the Moon*
Sandy: *sighs happily* It's great ta be back!
Anon: You know this place?
Sandy: Are ya kiddin? I've been here three times.
Anon: *counts his fingers quietly* "Sandy's Rocket", "Mooncation" and "Goons on the Moon". Yep, she did go to the Moon three times.
*Anon hums happily as he skips on the Moon. Just then a space rock appears and knocks him off the surface.*
Sandy: Oh no!
*Sandy throws a lasso at Anon and pulls him back to the surface.*
Anon: Thanks for saving me... again.
Sandy: No problem, pardner.
*Sandy hums her little tune and Anon whistles his tune as they continue walking on the Moon. Just then, Anon sees a Moon buggy.*
Anon: *gasps* Look at this! Someone left a space car here!
Sandy: That there's a Moon wagon! Come on! Let's take it fer a ride!
Anon: Okay.
*Anon sits in the passenger seat of the Moon buggy while Sandy sits in the driver's seat*
Anon: You sure this thing still works?
*Sandy drives the Moon buggy at a quick speed*
Anon: I stand corrected.
*They ride the Moon buggy across the surface*
Anon: WOOHOO!
Sandy: YEEHAW!
Anon: This is awesome!
Sandy: *laughs* This is rootin' tootin' good fun!
*The Moon buggy jumps over several Moon craters before stopping somewhere on the surface. Moments later, Anon and Sandy are seen laying on the surface, watching the stars.*
Anon: *sighs happily* This is what a space trip is all about. Ain't that right, Miss Cheeks?
Sandy: Yeah. Y'know, pardner, sometimes it's nice ta sit back and just watch the stars roll by.
Anon: The sheer beauty of the universe.
*They both sigh in relaxation.*
Anon: *points upwards* Do you know what thing is up there? Looks like a concoction of dark clouds and a bright glow.
Sandy: What yer starin' at is a part of our galaxy the Milky Way.
Anon: Come to think of it, it does look like a river of milk. *silence* Hmm... There's so much I don't know about the Moon. Like how does it control the tides on Earth?
*They sit up*
Sandy: Oh, it's very simple. The Earth's tides are controlled by the Moon's gravity. If the Moon is pulled out of its regular orbit, it could have DISASTROUS effects on the tides!
Anon: Ooh. I don't like the idea of the Moon going out of its orbit. Here's a fact I know about this place. The Moon's phases happen when a part of it is lit up by the sun as it orbits the Earth. Sometimes the Moon passes between the Earth and the Sun, blocking it out for a few minutes. We call that event a 'solar eclipse'. I'm not sure if the people of Bikini Bottom saw one of those before, but I believe they did. *pause* Hey. If a person got crazy on the Moon, they would be a 'luna-tic'!
Sandy: *chuckles* Yer good at them there jokes!
Anon: *sighs happily* This space adventure is going good so far. Nothing can ruin it.
*Meanwhile, a flying saucer carrying two aliens named Glorp and Blorg appears in front of the Moon*
Glorp: Over a hundred moons, Blorg. And one that is perfect for our vacation. Got the space stereo fired up?
Blorg: Oh. Uh...
Glorp: Did you forget to pack it?
Blorg: Sorry, Glorp.
Glorp: *sighs* Let's just enjoy our little camp out on that moon over there.
*The flying saucer flies towards the Moon. Anon and Sandy are relaxing on the Moon's surface until Anon sees the saucer pass by*
Anon: *gasps* I just saw a flying saucer!
Sandy: Calm down, pardner! It's just an asteroid.
Anon: I swore I could had saw something. *gets up* Look over there!
*Sandy gets up and spots the two aliens from the distance.*
Sandy: A-ha! Aliens! I knew it! SpongeBob was right all along! Let's get 'em!
Anon: Right!
*They run to where the aliens are. Glorp and Blorg notice them coming*
Glorp: We got Earth creatures inbound, Blorg!
Blorg: Looks like a human and a rodent. They don't pose any sort of threat.
Glorp: I don't know, Blorg. They could be dangerous. *sighs* Let's just greet them and get back to our vacation.
Blorg: Uh... Okay.
*The two aliens stand still just as Anon and Sandy arrive at their vacation spot*
Anon: At last! First contact!
Glorp: Greetings, Earth dwellers. I'm Glorp and this is my brother Blorg.
Blorg: Uh... Hello.
Sandy: Explain yerselves, ya slippery varmints!
Anon: Yeah! State your business!
Glorp: We are two aliens spending a vacation on this rock. We were having good fun 'til you two showed up!
Anon: Now that you mentioned it, a camp out on the Moon does seem nice.
Sandy: Yeah- Wait just a minute, Mr. Alien! Nobody fools a squirrel from Texas!
Glorp: I-It's not what you think!
Sandy: *angrily* Don't ya play coy with me! We know you two are campin' out on the Moon just so ya can invade Earth the next day! And we're not gonna take that sittin' down!
Anon: You can't fool us! I saw those movies!
Glorp: No really. We're just having a good time!
Anon: My teacher Sandy Cheeks and I are trying to have a fantastic space trip and you two are NOT gonna ruin it! And that is why we're asking you to leave this place!
Glorp: You want us to leave right now? *grows mad* That's not gonna happen, human! We're here to have a relaxing break! So why don't you and the squirrel just back off?!
Anon: And what if we don't?
Glorp: You'll leave us no choice but to take extreme measures! Deploy the Vaporizer 3000, Blorg!
Blorg: Uh... I forgot to pack it.
Glorp: Again?! Oh well, we'll just use these ray blasters. Setting them to maximum power!
*Glorp and Blorg aim the ray guns at Anon and Sandy*
Anon: Mommy?
Sandy: Ma?
Anon: I never thought I'd go out like this. In the hands of an alien.
Sandy: Oh. I'm gonna go ta the big oak tree in the sky.
*The aliens fire the ray blasters at them and they scream and run for shelter. They hide in one of the large craters. Glorp walks past one with a ray blaster in his hand.*
Sandy: We'll stay here 'til they leave us alone.
Anon: Good idea. *loudly* They'll never find us here!
Glorp: Huh?
Sandy: *softly* Shush it! We can't let 'em hear us.
Anon: *softly* Okay, I'll keep quiet.
Sandy: *softly* That's better.
Anon: *looks out from the crater and goes back in* You know. I'm getting pretty tired of being pushed around by these extraterrestrial jerks. I bet they do better karate than the people on Earth.
*Sandy's mind pings with an idea*
Sandy: That's it, pardner! Karate!
Anon: Not a bad idea, Miss Cheeks.
*Glorp and Blorg walk side by side until Anon and Sandy Cheeks jump out the crater in front of them*
Glorp: Oh! Back for more, Earth losers?
Anon: Yes we are! And we challenge you to a karate match!
Glorp: Is that so? Well I gotta warn you two. Me and Blorg are space karate masters!
*Glorp and Blorg put on headbands*
Glorp: You don't have what takes to tangle with us! No human or squirrel can defeat two aliens!
Sandy: Them's fightin' words, Mr. Alien!
Anon: Prepare to lose!
Glorp: Bring it on! *to Blorg* Blorg! Take care of the human!
Blorg: Got it.
*The squirrel and human duo and the two aliens get into their karate stances and charge at each other to begin the fight*
Anon: *to Blorg* Alright, alien! Put 'em up!
*Blorg puts up his fists and tries punching Anon, but Anon dodges Blorg's punches*
Anon: Ha! You missed me! Now it's my turn! Hi-ya!! *punches Blorg* Hi-ya!! *kicks him in the face*
Blorg: Ouch!
*Anon hits Blorg with a karate chop before Blorg counters with a kick. Anon grabs him by the arms and spins him round before throwing him to a crater wall*
Blorg: I knew I should had packed my karate master handbook.
Anon: Take that, alien scum!
Blorg: I'm not done with you yet.
*Blorg gets up and fights Anon again. Meanwhile, Glorp is fighting Sandy. He tries to punch and kick her, but he keeps missing*
Sandy: Y'all got the aim of a cross-eyed armadilla! Hi-ya!! *punches Glorp* Hi-ya!! *karate chops him* Pwaaaaa!! *kicks him, knocking him into a nearby crater*
Glorp: *gets up* Ugh! Alright, chipmunk! You've asked for it!
*Anon and Sandy continue fighting the two aliens until they kick them. The aliens are knocked onto their flying saucer*
Anon: The oldest trick in the book!
*Glorp and Blorg get up*
Sandy: Had enough, dirty aliens?
Glorp: Dirty?! We'll show you dirty once we blow up your puny planet! I'm glad you packed the Obliteratron 2000, Blorg. Begin deployment!
*Glorp deploys the Obliteratron, with sights aiming at Earth*
Anon: Heh. We did a good job. Right?
Sandy: Yep. But now those space critters are gonna destroy the Earth.
Anon: We must do something!
*Sandy spots an exhaust pipe on the Obliteratron*
Sandy: Hmm... *to Anon* You. Distract the aliens. I got an idea!
Anon: Will do.
Glorp: All systems check. Prepare for total annihilation.
*Anon appears in front of the aliens*
Anon: Hey! Look over here!
Glorp: What the? It's that human!
Anon: Look what I can do! *spins around on the spot while the aliens watch*
*Sandy slings an acorn into the exhaust pipe. The machine soon malfunctions*
Glorp: Oh! I knew I shouldn't put the exhaust pipe on the back!
*The Obliteratron explodes. Glorp and Blorg land on the surface*
Glorp: Ugh! Alright! We surrender! We'll leave the Moon right now! *sternly* But mark my words, we'll be back to get revenge!
Anon: Yeah right!
*Glorp and Blorg go back into their UFO and fly off*
Anon: Phew. I'm glad this whole thing is over with. *notices a rock* Hey! A Moon rock!
*Sandy Cheeks rolls her eyes. Later, they are back on the spaceship*
Sandy: Buckle up, pardner. 'Cause you and me is headin' ta Mars!
Anon: Mars. The fourth planet.
*They blast off from the Moon and fly towards the planet Mars. On the way, Anon sees Glorp and Blorg in their flying saucer having some problems*
Glorp: Quick, Blorg! Get me my toolkit! I think the Earth creatures broke something!
Blorg: Uh... Sorry.
Glorp: Don't tell me you forgot it!
*Glorp yells as the flying saucer spins out of control*
Anon: Happy trails, aliens. Those were some the stupidest aliens I've ever seen. I believe they caught the stupid from their friends.
Sandy: Stupidity isn't a virus, but it sure is spreadin' like one.
*They arrive at Mars*
Anon: Ooh. I never saw Mars up close before. I always spot a red speck in the night sky. *takes a picture of it with his camera*
*The spaceship lands on Mars' dusty surface before they exit to explore the planet*
Anon: Wow. This planet is amazing! And the surface looks rusty.
*Sandy scoops up some Martian soil*
Sandy: Just as I thought. This here Martian dirt is colored with red dust.
Anon: Cool. It's no wonder why people call Mars the 'Red Planet'.
*They continue walking on Mars' surface until Anon spots something high up*
Anon: Check it out! A Martian cliff!
Sandy: *whistles* That's taller than a glass of Texas iced tea!
Anon: It's the tallest one I've ever seen. *to Sandy* Hey, Miss Cheeks. I bet you can't beat me to the top!
Sandy: Course I can! No cliff is a match fer a squirrel!
Anon: Sounds like a challenge to me!
Sandy: Yer on! Last one up there's a dizzy sidewinder!
*Anon and Sandy begin racing each other up the Martian cliff. Sandy was in the lead for a few moments before Anon catches up. They soon reach the top, with Anon finishing first*
Anon: Yes! And the crowd goes wild!
Sandy: Well. Looks like yer the winner.
Anon: Thanks! I did some climbing in high school so I have tons of experience. *gazes at the view from the cliff* Wow! Look at that. All those volcanoes and canyons.
Sandy: Mars sure is interestin'.
Anon: Yeah. *looks down* How do we get down from here?
*Sandy is about to slide down the cliff*
Sandy: Hop on my back and we'll go down together!
Anon: Okay!
*Anon gets on Sandy's back and they both slide down the cliff*
Anon: WHEE!
Sandy: Yeah! Ride 'em, cowboy!
*They reach the bottom of the cliff and Anon gets off Sandy.*
Sandy: That was more fun than line dancin' in a barn!
Anon: You said it.
*A Mars rover appears in front of them*
Anon: Aw... A cute little Martian robot.
Sandy: Well. Ain't that an adorable lil' doohickey.
*The rover scans the duo*
Mars Rover: Scanning for intelligent Martian lifeforms. Martian lifeforms detected.
Anon: Hehe. You got it all wrong, little guy. We're not from Mars. We're two visitors from Earth.
*The Mars rover moves closer to them*
Mars Rover: Must capture intelligent lifeforms. *prepares to shoot a net*
Anon: Uh, I think it's trying to kidnap us!
Sandy: Oh no it ain't!
*Sandy walks towards the rover, ready to fight it*
Sandy: Excuse me, pardner.
*Anon winces as Sandy destroys the Mars rover with her karate*
Sandy: One less varmint!
Anon: *looks at the wrecked rover* Man! You got it good! Who was controlling this thing anyway?
*Back in Bikini Bottom, inside the Chum Bucket, it was revealed that Plankton was controlling the rover and was frustrated when it got destroyed*
Plankton: Great! Now how will I know Martians like the taste of chum?! Forget it. I'm going to my next plan to steal the Krabby Patty Formula.
*Back on Mars, Anon and Sandy are walking on the surface*
Anon: You know something. While Mercury is prone to extreme temperatures and Venus has the bad weather, Mars, I think, doesn't have anything that can put us in danger. This planet is perfectly safe.
Sandy: I don't think it's perfectly safe, pardner.
Anon: What do you mean?
Sandy: 'Cause of its orbit, Mars has dust storms worse than what we have in Texas!
Anon: A dust storm? Sounds terrifying. But for now, there's nothing there so it's fine at the moment.
Sandy: Completely.
*A dust cloud begins to form behind them. Anon looks behind*
Anon: I see some clouds rolling in.
Sandy: What are ya talkin' 'bout, pardner? There are no clouds on Mars!
Anon: There aren't any? Wait. If there are no clouds and that formation coming towards us looks like a cloud, that means it's...
*They look behind them and see the dust storm coming*
Anon + Sandy: AAAAAH!!
Sandy: RUN!!
Anon: Head for the shelter!
*They run to a nearby rock to shelter from the dust. They hide behind it, with only Sandy's tail sticking out. Eventually, the dust passes.*
Anon: *gasps* It's all over! We survived!
Sandy: Yeah! *looks at her tail, which is now covered in dust* Aw shoot! I just had my tail done!
*Anon finds a Mars rock and picks it up. Moments later, they are back on the spaceship. Anon was putting his Mars rock alongside the other rocks he collected while Sandy brushes the Martian dust off her tail*
Anon: You know. If it weren't for the frequent dust storms, Mars would had been the safest planet in the Solar System.
Sandy: Yup. But every planet has a dangerous secret.
Anon: Right. Mercury has those meteorite impacts, Venus has its volcanoes, Earth has its disasters and Mars has the dust storms. I wonder what secrets will the outer planets behold?
Sandy: Ya'll find out soon. Now let's get movin'!
*The spaceship takes off from Mars and enters the asteroid belt. Anon notices the asteroids floating around*
Anon: Whoa! I never thought there'd be a place in space with giant floating potatoes!
Sandy: *laughs* This place is called the asteroid belt. It's the belt that separates the inner planets from the outer planets.
Anon: Now that you mentioned it. The giant planets do lie beyond here. *feels uneasy* Some of those asteroids may look small...
*The spaceship gets hit by several asteroids*
Anon: But they pack a mighty punch!
*More asteroids hit the spaceship. One asteroid causes a small hole on top of the ship.*
Sandy: Ah nuts! Stay there and don't touch anything while I'm savin' our skins, okay?
Anon: Roger that.
*Sandy puts on a rocket pack and exits the spaceship. Meanwhile, Anon spots a circular object within the belt*
Anon: *gasps quietly* It's Ceres! The biggest asteroid of all and the only dwarf planet in the asteroid belt. Ooh. It's as big as Texas.
*Sandy finds the tiny hole and repairs it with duct tape*
Sandy: There we go. *reenters the spaceship* Nothin' a lil' duct tape can't handle.
Anon: All it took was duct tape. That must be a very small hole.
*The spaceship exits the asteroid belt and enters the other side of the Solar System. A gigantic planet with a spot on it comes into view. Both Sandy and Anon are shocked by its size*
Sandy: Holy Texas! That there's a big planet!
Anon: It must be Jupiter. *takes a picture of it* The biggest planet in the Solar System, and the fifth one from the Sun. I bet every other planet can fit inside it and still leave some room to spare!
Sandy: Yup. *takes a picture of Jupiter* Interestin' science fact: Jupiter is a planet made of gases and has no solid surface.
Anon: I get it. It's a gas giant and its main gases are hydrogen and helium, which are also found in stars. But it needs to be bigger to become a star itself. *looks at the spot* Poor Jupiter. It's got a huge blemish on its face.
Sandy: That there blemish is a storm known as the 'Great Red Spot'.
Anon: Still, a defining feature nonetheless. Must have been there for a long time.
*Anon notices the spaceship is moving too close to Jupiter*
Anon: Uh, Sandy. We might be FLYING TOO CLOSE TO THE PLANET!
*The spaceship runs out of control due to Jupiter's strong gravitational pull*
Sandy: Oh no! We're bein' lassoed by Jupiter's gravity!
Anon: Pull up! Pull up!
*Sandy grunts as she pulls the spaceship up and steers it away from Jupiter*
Anon: That's a relief. Another minute there and we would had sunk into Jupiter's atmosphere, never to be seen again!
Sandy: It's okay. It was my fault. I shoulda turned off the engines.
Anon: It's fine. *looks at Jupiter* Man! Jupiter has the strongest gravitational pull of any other planet in the system.
Sandy: Yes sir. Jupiter's gravity not only keeps its moons in orbit, but it also helps it protect planets like the Earth from those darn asteroids!
Anon: So not only Jupiter is the king, it's also the inner planets' bodyguard. *keeps an eye on Jupiter and sees one of its moons pass it. Gases are seen expelling from the moon* The moon that looks like a pizza must be very angry with all that steam coming out.
Sandy: Looks ya found one of Jupiter's four main moons. That one there's Io.
Anon: Io. That volcanic moon is weird enough to have a name with just two letters. What are the other three?
*Anon looks through the telescope while Sandy directs him*
Sandy: Well, there's Europa, Ganymede and Callisto.
Anon: Fascinating. Ganymede's a big 'un. It's the biggest moon of all. *to Sandy Cheeks* Hey, I'm getting sorta tired of looking at Jupiter and its big spot. Maybe we should move on and find another planet.
Sandy: Okay, pardner. Here we go!
*The spaceship leaves Jupiter's orbit. Minutes later, they find a yellow planet with a wonderful set of rings*
Sandy: *points to the planet* Right there's Saturn. *gasps in amazement* Ain't it beautiful? *takes a picture of the planet*
Anon: *takes a picture of Saturn* Yeah. No other planet could have such amazing rings as Saturn's. Speaking of which. These rings are not actually solid, they are made of little pieces of rock and ice. Some can be as small as a grain of sand and others can be big as a mountain. *looks both ways* There has to be more to Saturn than just the rings, right?
Sandy: Course there is, pardner. Saturn is one them gas giants. It's lighter than water, which means if it's put into a planet sized sea, it would float 'round like a leaf in a waterhole.
Anon: Nice. It's like Jupiter, but it is smaller and has rings. I wonder what Saturn would look like if its rings disappeared? I believe no one would recognize it.
Sandy: Not ta mention naked.
Anon: Heh. Just like you when you had your fur stolen.
*Sandy gives Anon an unimpressed look*
Anon: Sorry I had to bring that up.
Sandy: It's fine. *gets an idea* Let's see if I can drive this ship 'round the planet.
Anon: Uh, won't that waste fuel?
Sandy: Don't worry none, pardner. We still have just enough fuel ta go 'round Saturn and visit the other planets.
Anon: That's good enough for me.
Sandy: Get ready fer the real 'Tour de Saturn'!
*Sandy drives the spaceship around Saturn 3 times*
Sandy: YEEHAW!!
Anon: WHOA-OA-OA-OA!
Sandy: *stops the spaceship* Wasn't that great?
Anon: Ugh. I feel like I'm gonna be sick. But I did enjoy it.
*Anon spots an icy moon moving in front of Saturn*
Anon: I found another moon!
Sandy: *looks at the icy moon* That there's Enceladus.
Anon: Eucalyptus?
Sandy: *laughs* Enceladus! It's the moon that scientists say might have alien critters hidin' beneath its icy skin.
Anon: Hmm... They said the same thing for Jupiter's moon Europa. And over there *points to an orange moon* is Titan, the only one with an atmosphere like Earth. Check out that one! *points to a weirdly shaped moon* Its name is Hyperion.
Sandy: Golly. Hyperion has more holes than my lil' friend SpongeBob!
Anon: It must be the remains of a moon that got destroyed a long time ago. *silence* I know what the other major moons of Saturn are.
Sandy: Well. What are they?
Anon: There's Mimas, the one that looks an eyeball. There's also Dione, Iapetus, Rhea and Tethys.
Sandy: Mm-mm. Ya sure know yer moons!
Anon: Thanks.
*Just then, an icy rock with a bright tail zooms past Saturn.*
Sandy: O.M. Jehoshaphat! Ya don't see that everyday!
Anon: That's a comet! I wonder which way it came from.
Sandy: Hmm... *points to the direction the comet came from* That way!
*The spaceship blasts away from Saturn's orbit to follow the direction the comet came from. It ends up near a light blue planet.*
Anon: Apparently, the direction has taken us to another planet.
Sandy: *gasps in excitement* We're at Uranus! *takes a picture of the planet*
Anon: *takes a picture* That's Uranus, huh?
Sandy: 'Course it is. It's right there in front of ya.
Anon: Uranus. *laughs at the way the planet is tilted* It's all funny looking. *tilts his head over* Hello, I'm Uranus! I went all sideways and now I'm a stupid ball of gas! *points at Uranus* You're better off in the orbit around Polaris, dumb planet!
*Sandy gets mad and grabs Anon*
Sandy: What did ya say?!
Anon: Uranus is a dumb planet?!
Sandy: Look, mister! If ya make fun of a planet again, I'll be on ya like a horsefly on a cracker barrel! *shows a red karate glove*
Anon: I'm sorry, Miss Cheeks! Please don't hurt me with your karate! Uranus is just my least favorite of the eight planets, that's all.
*Sandy puts Anon down*
Anon: It may not be my absolute favorite, but Uranus is an interesting ball of gas.
*The spaceship flies through the methane clouds of Uranus*
Anon: Nice. As far as I know, the clouds contain methane gas, which give Uranus its blue color.
*The spaceship flies away from Uranus. Anon investigates the planet's moons*
Anon: Another fact. Uranus' moons are Oberon, Titania, Ariel, Umbriel and that bizarre one named Miranda. *points to Miranda*
Sandy: Golly! It's more damaged than a barn in a Texas twister!
Anon: It looks as though a great force stitched that moon back together. Got another fact about good ol' Uranus?
Sandy: Sure do. Uranus is awful stinky with the smell of rotten acorns.
Anon: It's more like the stench of rotten eggs, I but see your point. Uranus reeks! *retches*
*Later, the spaceship arrives at a dark blue planet*
Anon: Sweet Neptune! It's Neptune! The eighth planet. *takes a picture of Neptune with his camera*
Sandy: Darn right it is! *takes a picture* Neptune is the fourth biggest planet in the Solar System, not ta mention the coldest.
Anon: Yeah. And the winds on Neptune go as fast as the speed of sound!
Sandy: Shee-yoot! That's speedy!
*Anon spots a dark storm on Neptune's surface*
Anon: Hey, look! Neptune has a storm just like Jupiter. Only time this time, it's dark instead of red.
*The spaceship flies past Neptune and then its main moon*
Sandy: Right now, we're flyin' past Neptune and its moon Triton.
Anon: Nice. Triton is named after the son of Neptune, the king of the sea.
*The spaceship reaches a small icy world named Pluto*
Sandy: There it is.
Anon: What is it?
Sandy: This is Pluto!
Anon: Pluto. *sighs sadly* Poor little guy.
Sandy: What is the matter, pardner?
Anon: *sadly* I've grown up knowing that icy rock was the NINTH planet. Even the teachers at my elementary school said so. Then it happened. Those mean old astronomers gave it the boot, saying it's not a planet anymore, just a stinking dwarf planet!
Sandy: Hey. Take it easy! Pluto's nothin' ta get so worked up 'bout!
Anon: Yeah. But just looking at it. So lonesome. Left there without its friends Neptune, Saturn and Mars. *tearfully* It breaks my heart.
*Sandy looks at Pluto and begins to feel sad. Tears start to form in her eyes*
Sandy: Y'know somethin', pardner? It breaks my heart too.
Anon: Oh, Pluto! They shouldn't had demoted you in the first place! *cries*
Sandy: They shoulda never treated ya like cow manure! *cries*
*Both Anon and Sandy cry, causing both their helmets to start filling up with their tears.*
Anon: Why, Pluto? WHY?!
Sandy: I never cried this much since I lost my last rodeo!
*They hug each other as they continued crying. Anon wept while Sandy sobbed heavily.*
Anon: I wish there is something we can do to help Pluto!
Sandy: There's nothin' we can do! *cries*
Anon: There must be a way! *stops crying and thinks about something* I got it! The criteria for dwarf planets says that in order for a space object to be a planet, it has to be round, it has to not be a moon, it has to orbit the Sun and the neighborhood around the object has to be clear of any debris. Pluto is located in the Kuiper Belt, so it has rocks surrounding it. But what can we do? It's not like we can pull it out of the Kuiper Belt.
*Sandy stops crying when an idea pops into her head*
Sandy: Maybe we can!
*Sandy takes out a flusher handle and gives one to Anon. They pull them down on their helmets to flush out their tears*
Anon: How?
Sandy: It's simple, pardner. We can just lasso Pluto and pull it outta the Kuiper belt!
Anon: Pluto is such a big rock, though. You sure it would work?
Sandy: Course it will. When I visited the Moon with my Science Scouts, SpongeBob pressed the launch button by mistake and moved the Moon outta its regular orbit. Pluto's smaller than the Moon, so it should be easy ta move.
Anon: That's good enough for me. Let's rescue this icy world!
*Seconds later, the spaceship is on Pluto's surface. Anon looks out as Sandy has an anchor at the ready*
Anon: Ready? Set. NOW!
Sandy: Hi-ya!! *throws the anchor at Pluto, which then hooks itself on one of the mountains* Gotcha!
*Sandy goes back to her seat. The spaceship starts to fly away with the anchor still on Pluto*
Anon: Is it working?
Sandy: Almost. Just a lil' more Southern elbow grease!
*The spaceship pulls on the anchor and Pluto begins to move. Charon, Pluto's moon, follows the dwarf planet*
Anon: IT'S WORKING!
Sandy: Yeehaw!
*The spaceship pulls Pluto out of the Kuiper Belt. Astronomers in Bikini Bottom see this happening*
Astronomer 1: Am I seeing this correctly?
Astronomer 2: Yes. Apparently, Pluto has been pulled out of the Kuiper Belt.
Astronomer 1: Fascinating. Wait. If it's out of the Kuiper Belt, then it now has a clear neighborhood. *ticks off the 'clear neighborhood' box* Exciting news, everyone! Pluto's been reclassified as a planet!
*All the astronomers cheer*
Astronomer 3: I knew this day would come. *blows a tissue*
*Back in space, the spaceship is still pulling Pluto*
Anon: A little more... Perfect! Right there!
*The spaceship stops*
Anon: Whew! How's ol' Pluto doing in its new place in the Solar System?
*Sandy Cheeks looks at the monitor and sees that Pluto's orbit has changed*
Sandy: Not too bad. It's a lil' closer ta Neptune.
Anon: You're right. But they shouldn't smash into each other anytime soon. *looks at the communicator on his wrist* Great news, Sandra!
Sandy: What is it?
Anon: Astronomers have said that PLUTO'S A PLANET AGAIN!
Sandy: *gasps* We did it!
Anon: Yeah! The Solar System's back to having nine planets. Just the way it should be!
Sandy: We saved Pluto!
Anon: Yay! *silence* Uh, is this planet the last stop of the tour?
Sandy: Darn tootin'!
*The spaceship lands on Pluto, with the anchor still on the surface. On the spaceship, Anon and Sandy are wearing warm coats and drinking hot chocolate. They get whipped cream on their faces. Sandy sneezes the cream onto her helmet and licks it off.*
Anon: Mmm mmm. This hot chocolate's really good! *licks the whipped cream off his face*
Sandy: Thank you. I made it myself.
Anon: Well, you sure know how to make a great drink!
*Moments later, they step on Pluto's icy surface. Anon could not believe his eyes.*
Anon: Whoa! It's like a celestial winter wonderland! All these mountains and glaciers! *spots a very bright but distant star* Look over there! I found the Sun!
Sandy: That's the Sun? I'm as confused as a bull on Astroturf.
Anon: It's definitely the Sun! But because Pluto's so far away, it's nothing more than a dim star, *quietly* like Patrick.
*Anon looks behind him and sees that Sandy has set up her telescope and is observing space*
Anon: What are you doing?
Sandy: Oh, I'm just takin' a gander at Pluto's ol' neighbors in the Kuiper Belt.
Anon: Other dwarf planets, huh? Mind if I take a look?
Sandy: Sure, why not?
*Sandy steps aside and Anon looks through the telescope*
Anon: Incredible. *looks at Haumea* There's Haumea, the one that looks like an egg! It's got a ring around it! *to Sandy* Don't tell Saturn. *looks at Makemake* Over there is the dwarf planet whose name is pronounced "makay makay". I like its maroon color. *looks at Sedna* That's Sedna, the most distant dwarf planet in the Solar System. *looks at Eris* And right there is... *grows mad* Ugh! Eris. It may be the biggest, but it's still just a dumb rock! If I had some weapons, I could destroy it!
Sandy: *grows mad* What's gotten into you?! Eris ain't done nothin' wrong!
Anon: Oh yeah? Get this! This dwarf planet was responsible for Pluto's downgrading! And that's why I hate it! *notices how cold Pluto is* Man! This place is colder than a cactus in the middle of January!
Sandy: Hmm... Not a bad attempt at a Texas saying.
Anon: Thanks. Even though I'm not from Texas. I actually live in-
Sandy: Hold that thought, pardner! 'Cause it's time fer some snowboarding!
Anon: Go snowboarding on Pluto? *silence* Now you're talkin'!
*Seconds later, they are on snowboards on top of a small Plutonian mountain*
Sandy: Yer ready?
Anon: I sure am!
Sandy: Here we go!
Anon: Woohoo!
*They slide down the mountain and fly into the air*
Anon: I got some moves of my own! This one is called the Wormhole! *spins on his side like a corkscrew* Right here is the Cosmic Cartwheel! *does a cartwheel in midair* Next is the Plutonian Ice Breaker! *breaks the top of another mountain with his foot* And last but not least *floats around Pluto's moon Charon* the Charon Cruiser! *goes back to Pluto*
Sandy: Nice moves, pardner. But I betcha can't beat the "Reverse Wormhole"! *spins and hits Anon by mistake* Whoops!
*Anon falls down and rides on his snowboard before he wipes out on a rock and lands on a glacier*
Anon: *gets up* No harm done. Just landed in this Texas-sized glacier! *hears ice cracking* Ah nuts! *falls into the icy glacier*
Sandy: NOOOOOOOO!!
*Anon rises back up in a block of ice*
Sandy: Hold on, pardner! I'll save ya!
*Sandy lassos the ice block out of the icy Plutonian water and pushes it back to the spaceship. She finds a blowtorch and uses it to thaw Anon out of the block of ice.*
Anon: *gasps* Phew! Another minute in that icy cage and I would had gone insane! At least now I know that Pluto has ice cold water. I'm glad you rescued me, Miss Cheeks.
Sandy: Thanks, pardner.
Anon: Let's go back home! We're done here.
*The anchor is lifted back up and the spaceship blasts off from Pluto. It flies at breakneck speed past Neptune, Uranus, Saturn, Jupiter and Mars before reaching Earth*
Sandy: Brace yerself, pardner! It's gonna get bumpy once we hit the atmosphere!
Anon: Oh dear.
*The spaceship reenters the Earth's atmosphere and the nose begins to catch fire*
Sandy: Yeehaw!
Anon: Oh my gosh!
*The fire is put out once the spaceship splashes into the ocean. It makes it back to Bikini Bottom and lands just near the Treedome. Sandy and Anon step out with their suitcases.*
Anon: Racing on Mercury, fighting aliens on the Moon and helping Pluto become a planet again. Now that's what I call a 'space trip'!
Sandy: You said it, pardner! We had a rip-snortin' good time takin' a gander at all the planets.
???: *mutters angrily* Curses!
Sandy: Ya hear somethin'?
Anon: It came from over there.
*They walk closer to the source of the noise and find Plankton.*
Anon: Hey! It's Plankton; Owner of the Chum Bucket.
Plankton: What? *turns around and gasps* It's you!
Anon: What are you saying?
Plankton: I know who you are! You and the squirrel have destroyed my beautiful Mars rover!
*Sandy and Anon both gasp*
Sandy: Plankton! We shoulda known that Martian robot was yer doin'!
Anon: Yeah! That robot tried to capture us!
Plankton: Y-you got it all wrong! My rover thought you two were Martians!
Anon: I don't wanna hear it, Plankton! Get out of my sight!
Plankton: Very well. But one day, revenge will be MINE!
*Anon and Sandy turn around and walk. Anon turns his head and sees Plankton has disappeared*
Anon: Where did he go?
Sandy: Looks like he hightailed it back ta the Chum Bucket.
Anon: I'm sure he did. *notices something* Hey, Sandy. Part of your tail's missing.
Sandy: Huh? *looks at her tail and gasps*
*Anon sees that Sandy is in shock.*
Anon: Oh my. This looks bad. *backs a few steps away and puts some noise-cancelling headphones on his head. Sandy's shock soon turns into anger.*
Sandy: PLANKTOOOOOOON!!
Anon: Oh boy. Wouldn't be the first time Plankton messed with you.
Sandy: *annoyed* Don't push it.
Anon: *meekly* Sorry. Still, it was an amazing journey through outer space.
Sandy: Yup. And I want ya ta have this. *gives a mini teleporter to Anon*
Anon: What's this?
Sandy: It's a teleporter, duh! It lets ya teleport ta Bikini Bottom and back ta yer home in a blink of an eye.
Anon: Cool. Well, I better go back to where was. Thanks for everything, Sands! And the teleporter! *presses the button on the teleporter and he disappears in a flash*
Sandy: Hmm... No one's called me "Sands". Not even SpongeBob or Patrick. *shrugs and walks into the Treedome*
*Anon reappears in his home and removes his spacesuit and helmet before storing it away and putting the teleporter on a shelf*
Anon: Ah... That tour of the Solar System was just perfect. I'll remember it for a long, long time.
*The end*
Enjoy!
Sandy Cheeks - Nickelodeon and Stephen Hillenburg (R.I.P.)
*In a cartoon world, somewhere in the USA, an anonymous young man is looking at the night sky through a telescope from his house. He is the same anonymous guy who was assisted a month ago by a certain Texan squirrel scientist.*
Anon: Hmm... Let's see. Stars. *points the telescope in another direction* Stars. *points it to yet another direction* Stars and more stars. *sighs* I'm so bored, I can't concentrate. *gasps* That star moved! *looks through the telescope again* Oh, it's just a helicopter. I was expecting to look at a planet tonight. I guess I can't. *finds a book on astronomy* Maybe this book will have some answers.
*Anon reads the book for a few minutes before feeling bored again*
Anon: Man. Astronomy is so boring. And I'm expecting another science test next month. The sky may be great to look at, but there could be more out there. *puts the book down and lies in bed* There has to be something that can make studying astronomy fun and exciting. Anything! *lies his head on a pillow*
*Anon suddenly hears his Interdimensional Phone ringing*
Anon: Must be my mother.
*Anon picks up the phone*
Anon: No, mother. I don't need any more- Oh. Hi, Sandy.
*In the SpongeBob universe, inside the Treedome, the Texas-born scientist Sandy Cheeks is calling Anon with an Interdimensional Phone of her own. She is in her signature purple and green bikini*
Sandy: Howdy, pardner. How's it goin'?
Anon: It's going great. I just got an A+ on my anatomy test and it's all thanks to the tour you gave me months ago. And that tour where I met SpongeBob and all your friends. So... how are you feeling today?
Sandy: Pretty good, 'cept that SpongeBob has a busy shift at the Krusty Krab and has no time fer karate right now. *sighs* I'm as bored as a jackrabbit waitin' fer a bus in the city of Dallas.
Anon: I feel your pain. I've got an astronomy test next month and I'm tired of looking through a telescope and reading a book on outer space. If only there's a way to make it more interesting.
*A lightbulb flies over Sandy's head*
Sandy: HOT DIGGITY! I got an idea that'll solve both our problems!
Anon: Lemme hear it, Miss Cheeks.
Sandy: How 'bout you and me go on a trip ta outer space?
Anon: SPACE?! Where all the stars and planets live?
Sandy: Yup.
Anon: All right! This is gonna be awesome! Let me pack some stuff first. It's gonna be a long day!
*Anon puts down the phone and packs up some of his stuff into a suitcase. Once done packing, he picks up the suitcase and the Interdimensional Phone*
Anon: Okay! I'm ready! Cue teleportation!
*The Interdimensional Phone sucks in Anon and he is teleported to the Treedome with his suitcase in his hand. He stands in front of Sandy*
Sandy: Welcome back, pardner!
*Anon has an eager look on his face*
Sandy: My! Ya look as happy as a clam in high tide!
Anon: Is it true? Am I actually going to space with you?
Sandy: That's right! *pulls down a chart of the Solar System* You and me are gonna explore all the planets of the Solar System!
Anon: *points out some of the planets in the chart* Wow! There's a red planet, another one with rings and one that is blue as the sea! Wonderful! *feels himself over* Uh... I haven't got a spacesuit.
Sandy: Oops! I almost forgot! *gives Anon a spacesuit he can wear* Here ya go.
Anon: Thanks, Sandy.
*Sandy puts on her spacesuit and her helmet with the flower on it*
Sandy: No problem, pardner. Now if ya excuse me, I'm gonna go power up my spaceship. Meet me outside once ya put on yer suit.
Anon: Okay!
*Sandy walks out of the Treedome with two suitcases, one for her guitar and the other for the rest of her things. Anon puts on his spacesuit and helmet. Anon's suit looks similar to Sandy's, except it doesn't have an acorn symbol and the helmet has no flower. Anon looks all over himself*
Anon: Nice. Fits perfectly, just like the suit I went into her body with.
*Anon picks up his suitcase and runs out of the Treedome*
Anon: Bikini Bottom sure is looking good today.
*Anon turns around and catches sight of Sandy's new spaceship*
Anon: Whoa!
*Sandy appears beside him*
Sandy: Whatdya think of my space wagon?
Anon: It's impressive. A true work of science.
Sandy: Why thank you, pardner. Let's go!
*Anon and Sandy run into the spaceship. When inside, Anon sets his suitcase down. Anon and Sandy sit in the two seats facing the windshield. Sandy checks to see that everything is in order*
Sandy: Just some last-minute readings... and there! We're all charged up and ready ta go! Buckle up!
*Anon tries to fasten his seatbelt*
Anon: *grunts* Why you! Come on. *grunts*
Sandy: Uh, everything okay, pardner?
Anon: Almost got it! *fastens his seatbelt* There!
Sandy: Beginnin' countdown! Ten.
Anon: Nine!
Sandy: Eight!
Anon: Seven!
Sandy: Six!
Anon: Five!
Sandy: Four!
Anon: Three!
Sandy: Two!
Anon: One!
Sandy: Launch!
*Sandy accidentally hits the 'Lunch' button*
Sandy: Ugh! Lunch again! *hits the launch button*
*The spaceship begins to shake and is about to launch into outer space. Moments later, the spaceship blasts off. At the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob is seen flipping Krabby Patties until a rumble from the spaceship interrupts his fry cooking. He looks through the window and sees the spaceship taking off*
SpongeBob: Ooh. Looks like Sandy's going away for the day. That'll give me time to practice my new karate moves.
*SpongeBob steps back into the kitchen. Squidward is seen napping at the cash register*
Squidward: Wake me when I care.
*At Patrick's rock, Patrick sees the spaceship going up*
Patrick: Wow. I must be dreaming.
*Patrick's rock slams shut. Meanwhile, back in the spaceship.*
Anon: Boy! This is gonna be a fun space trip! Right, Sandy? Uh, Sandy?
*Sandy looks at a clipboard*
Sandy: Uh, I'm kinda busy right now, pardner.
Anon: I see.
Sandy: Prepare yerself fer the afterburners!
Anon: What?
*Sandy activates the afterburners, causing the spaceship to propel faster and shoot out of the ocean. Their heads are pushed to the back of the helmets by the speed.*
Sandy: Hold on, pardner! We're crossin' the stratosphere! Now we're goin' through the mesosphere! Enterin' the magnetosphere!
Anon: And coming out through the exosphere!
*The spaceship finally makes it to outer space*
Anon: I'm witnessing it before my very eyes. The wonders of space.
Sandy: *turns off the spaceship's engines* Okay, pardner. Yer free ta move 'round!
*Anon takes off his belt and begins floating around*
Anon: Whoa! *laughs* I'm weightless! Light as a feather! *pretends to swim and spins around* Zero gravity is awesome!
Sandy: *chuckles* Havin' fun back there?
Anon: You bet!
*Anon's peace is disturbed when something hits the spaceship*
Anon: What the?! Something hit us!
Sandy: Oh no! We got space junk! Back in yer seat! Yer mama won't save ya now!
*Anon gets back in his seat and fastens his seatbelt. Sandy reactivates the engines and drives the spaceship through the space junk.*
Anon: Man! Whoever left all this floating around must be one filthy slob.
*The spaceship continues getting hit by space junk. Anon and Sandy witness something glowing ahead of them*
Sandy: *gasps* We're goin' through the radiation belt! That could cause mutations!
Anon: Mutations?! I'm too handsome to be a freak!
Sandy: Get under yer lead blanket!
*Sandy and Anon take cover under lead blankets as the spaceship passes through the radiation belt. Once it emerged from the radiation belt, Sandy uncovers herself*
Sandy: It's all safe now, pardner!
Anon: *uncovers himself* Phew! That was close. Let the tour begin!
*The spaceship turns around and goes toward the Sun*
Sandy: Right now, we're headin' fer the Sun!
Anon: The star of the show. Much like Patrick Star, huh?
Sandy: *laughs* No, silly. Patrick's a sea star! This here's a real star!
Anon: Gotcha!
*Sandy stops the spaceship at a safe distance from the Sun. She and Anon are wearing special goggles to protect their eyes from the Sun's light*
Anon: Wow! It's a giant ball of hot gas!
Sandy: The Sun, like any other star, makes its energy through somethin' called nuclear fusion.
Anon: Neat. If remember correctly, it happens when hydrogen atoms fuse together to form helium.
Sandy: That's right, pardner. The Sun's light brightens our day and keeps us alive.
Anon: Yeah. If it weren't for the Sun, none of us would be here right now! *takes another look at the Sun* Holy moly! It's massive! I wonder how many Earths can fit inside it?
Sandy: Over a million!
Anon: A million Earths? Gosh! *sees some dark spots on the Sun* Someone's got an acne problem.
Sandy: *chuckles* Those are sunspots! They're cooler than anywhere else on the Sun.
Anon: But they're still extremely hot, at over 6500 degrees Fahrenheit!
*Anon notices something happening on the Sun's surface*
Anon: Wait a minute. This doesn't seem right. Take a look at this.
*Sandy takes a look at the Sun. She then screams in a similar tone to the time SpongeBob and Patrick shaved her bald.*
Anon: What is it, Sandy?
Sandy: A SOLAR FLARE'S COMIN' STRAIGHT FOR US!
Anon: Solar flare?! OH NO! It'll corrupt the electronics of this spaceship!
Sandy: We're doomed!
Anon: I guess this is it!
*The Sun blasts out a solar flare as Anon and Sandy huddle together. Luckily, the flare misses the spaceship and Earth as well.*
Anon: Phew! I'm glad it missed us. Solar flares can be really terrifying.
*The heat generated by the Sun hits the ship and things start to get too hot. Anon and Sandy begin to pant and sweat*
Anon: *panting* Is it just me or it is getting hot around here?
*The Sun continues warming up the spaceship. Back on the ship, Anon is in his shirt and pants and tries to cool down by fanning himself with his hand. On the other side, Sandy is in her bikini, panting heavily and fanning herself with her tail*
Anon: *panting* I... think... we went... too close.
Sandy: *panting* It's high time we hightail it away from this fireball!
*Sandy takes control and pilots the spaceship away from the Sun. They have their suits and helmets back on*
Anon: Gee. The Sun is some star. *looks both ways* By the way. How are stars, like the Sun, born?
Sandy: Funny ya should ask that. *brings down a computer which shows a simulation of star birth* It's very simple, pardner. A star is created in a cloud of space dust known as a nebula. A nebula is so big that its size is measured in light years. *looks at Anon* Are ya gettin' all this?
Anon: *nods* Uh huh.
Sandy: Inside a nebula, a cloud of gas and dust collapses under its own gravity and it creates a core.
Anon: Interesting.
Sandy: As time goes on, the core heats up 'til it becomes hot enough ta start nuclear fusion.
Anon: And just like that, a star is born. *thinks for a bit* Unfortunately, stars don't last forever. But what happens to them when they, as you might say, 'head for the last roundup'?
*The star birth simulation changes into a star death simulation*
Sandy: Well, pardner. The way a star ends its life depends on its size. When a star the size of the Sun runs out of gas, it grows into a red giant. It then sheds its skin and becomes what we scientists call a 'planetary nebula'. And last but not least, the star shrinks down into a white dwarf. Some day, the Sun will go through this stage. But don't fret none! It'll never happen in our lives!
Anon: Ooh! You had me worried there, Sandra. But what happens to stars bigger than the Sun?
Sandy: Well. Big stars end their lives in fantastic style! When they grow ta red supergiants, they keep on fusin' atoms 'til the core is nothin' but iron. The iron core then collapses under pressure and the whole star explodes into a supernova! KER-POW!!
Anon: *sees the supernova on the computer* Whoa!
Sandy: A supernova usually leaves behind a neutron star. But it doesn't always happen. Some big stars leave behind the scariest thing in outer space... a black hole!
Anon: *sees the black hole on the computer* Yipe!
Sandy: The gravity of a black hole is so strong, nothin' can escape it! Not even light! Once ya cross the event horizon, it's all over!
*The computer goes back up*
Anon: Boy, black holes are spooky. But nebulae, on the other hand, make for some beautiful pictures. Speaking of which, do you mind if I look for some through the telescope?
Sandy: Sure, why not?
*Anon looks through the telescope*
Anon: Hmm... *turns the telescope in multiple directions* There's the Orion, the Horsehead, the Helix, the Ring, the Eagle, the Dumbbell, the Bubble, the Lagoon, the Cat's Eye and the Hourglass. Wait a sec! *finds a nebula shaped like Texas* Hey, Sandy. I found one that looks like Texas!
*Sandy looks through the telescope and sees the nebula*
Sandy: Well tan my fur! Looks like ya found the Texas Nebula!
Anon: Really? Sweet! Discovering a nebula will definitely get me a high grade. *sees a planet coming in closer* Uh, I think we're approaching something round and rocky.
Sandy: That there's Mercury. The first planet from the Sun and our first stop!
Anon: Hold on. We're landing on this thing? Cool!
*The spaceship heads for Mercury and lands on its surface. Sandy and Anon exit the spaceship and take a look around Mercury.*
es
Sandy: And here we are! On the surface of Mercury!
Anon: Wow! I've never been somewhere like this before!
*Anon and Sandy each take a picture of Mercury's surface with their cameras. Anon then skips along and discovers that he is lighter than on Earth*
Anon: Whoa. I feel lighter than I do on good ol' Earth.
Sandy: That's 'cause, scientifically speakin', Mercury is smaller than Earth. And that means there's less gravity pullin' ya down.
Anon: Oh I see.
Sandy: And another scientific fact: Mercury is too small ta have an atmosphere, therefore there's no wind and no air fer us ta breathe.
Anon: *frustrated* Drat! I shouldn't had packed my kite! *lands back on the surface* Jumping is so fun on Mercury. Hey, Sandy. I bet I can jump higher than you!
Sandy: Yer on, pardner!
*Sandy and Anon jump high above the surface of Mercury*
Anon: WAHOO!
Sandy: Yeehaw! This is as fun as watchin' a rodeo!
*They land back on the surface. Anon notices all the craters*
Anon: Look at all these marks on the surface!
Sandy: Golly! Mercury looks more busted than one of my opponents after a karate match!
Anon: It's just like the Moon, only bigger. Pretty amazing for a planet that shares a name with a poisonous liquid metal. *takes a look at the craters* Hey, how about a race around these craters?
*Sandy and Anon begin running on Mercury's surface, around the craters*
Anon: It makes me wonder what kind of force made all this.
*Sandy moves ahead of Anon*
Sandy: *laughs* Betcha can't keep up with me, slowpoke!
Anon: Ha! Eat my Mercury dust!
*Sandy and Anon continue running and jumping over the small craters until Anon trips on a space rock.*
Anon: Ouch!
Sandy: *runs to Anon* You okay, pardner?
Anon: I guess so. *looks at the space rock* That's what I tripped over.
Sandy: *gasps* It's a meteorite. Interestin' science fact; space rocks smaller than asteroids are known as meteoroids and when they *punches her own hand* smash into a planet, they're called meteorites.
Anon: Meteoroid, meteorite. It's the whole lava magma situation all over again. Wait. Meteorite. That explains everything. Since Mercury has no atmosphere like you said earlier, it's vulnerable to being pelted by meteorites. That's why it's covered with craters. *smiles* What do you call a space rock that hits the planet in the opposite direction?
Sandy: What?
Anon: A meteorLEFT!
*A rimshot plays. Anon and Sandy laugh.*
Sandy: Yer about as funny as ears on an acorn!
Anon: I know!
*They continue laughing. Anon stops laughing when he looks up and sees a meteoroid heading for them*
Anon: Huh? *sees the meteoroid coming in closer* Look out!
*Anon jumps on top of Sandy to push her out of the meteoroid's path before it hits the surface*
Sandy: *gets up* What in tarnation was that for?!
Anon: Hey! I saved your life. That meteoroid was coming straight for us!
Sandy: Yeah. But ya didn't have ta push me!
Anon: Sorry, Sandy. Let's look at that meteorite that just crashed here.
*Anon and Sandy take a look at the medium-sized meteorite*
Anon: Wow! Would you look at that!
Sandy: Shee-yoot! That meteorite's as big as a Texas T-bone!
Anon: Fascinating. Hey! How about we each take a sample of this space rock? I can keep one as a souvenir and you can keep one for further study.
Sandy: Great idea, pardner! That's thinkin' like a scientist!
*Anon uses a pickaxe to chip off small rocks from the meteorite. Anon picks one up and Sandy picks one as well*
Anon: This would go great with my rock collection.
*Things start to go dark on Mercury*
Anon: Hey. Did someone turn out the lights?
Sandy: Oh no! It's gettin' dark!
Anon: That's bad, isn't it?
Sandy: Darn right it is! Without an atmosphere, Mercury can't keep its warmth!
Anon: *gasps* That means it's hot in the day and cold at night!
*Sandy and Anon are in the darkness of Mercury and start to feel cold*
Anon: *shivering* I-I-I-I th-th-th-think we s-s-s-stayed here l-l-long enough.
Sandy: *shivering* W-w-w-we b-b-better get back t-t-t-ta the ship.
*Anon and Sandy run out of the shade and back into the spaceship before taking off from Mercury and progressing to the next planet.*
Sandy: Brace yerself, pardner. We're gettin' close ta Venus.
*Anon gets a view of Venus*
Anon: Ooh. The second planet from the Sun.
*Anon takes a picture of the planet with his camera. The spaceship gets too close to Venus and its gravity begins to pull it down*
Sandy: Mayday! Mayday! We're goin' down!
Anon: Aagh! We're gonna crash!
*Anon and Sandy scream as the spaceship falls to Venus' surface before Sandy takes the helm and lands the ship safely. The human and squirrel then exit the ship and take a first look at Venus' volcanic landscape before they each take a picture with their cameras*
Anon: Whoa! Venus sure looks different on the surface. That's probably because we only saw its clouds from space. *looks left and right* So many volcanoes! Thank goodness they're still sleeping.
*Anon jumps up and down*
Anon: Hey! This place has Earth's gravity! I weigh much more than on Mercury.
Sandy: Scientifically speakin', it's 'cause Venus is almost the same size as our home planet.
Anon: Interesting. And with all these clouds, it would be a great place to live on. Don't you think, Miss Cheeks?
*Sandy is shocked after hearing what Anon said about Venus*
Sandy: Live on Venus?! I hate ta precipitate on yer party, but that's impossible!
Anon: Why? Don't Venus and Earth both have an atmosphere?
Sandy: They do, but that's where the similarities END! Venus is an evil planet! With a hot surface, extreme weather and a high atmospheric pressure, nothin' can survive here!
Anon: High atmospheric pressure? *worried* Are you sure our suits are saving us from getting crushed like tin cans?
Sandy: Course they are. As long as we keep 'em on, we should be safe.
Anon: Phew. That's a relief. Now about the surface temperature. How hot can it get on this planet?
Sandy: Up ta 900 degrees! Venus is hotter than a barbeque on asphalt in the middle of August!
Anon: 900 degrees? That's hot enough to melt lead! *thinks* If I remember correctly, it's caused by a greenhouse effect that's also affecting the Earth. I fear that Earth may one day end up like Venus, unless everyone stops polluting. *looks down on a Venusian rock* Hey! A genuine Venus rock. *picks it up* You're going straight into my collection, little guy. And here's one for you. *gives another rock to Sandy*
Sandy: Uh, thanks?
*The clouds on Venus begin to roll over and the wind starts to pick up*
Anon: Oh goody. Some rain will cool down this fiery death trap.
Sandy: 'Cept the fact it's sulfuric acid and not water!
Anon: *nervously* Now I'm terrified.
*A lightning bolt comes from the clouds and zaps Anon and Sandy, leaving them both fried.*
Anon: I'm glad we survived that one. That would had usually killed us!
*The sulfuric acid rain starts coming down*
Anon: I think now's the good time to-
Sandy: RUN LIKE HECK!
*They run back to the spaceship*
Anon: *panting* That was close!
Sandy: Yeah. *looks at her tail with a few burns on it and gasps* My beautiful tail!
Anon: Don't worry, Sandy. You'll walk it off. Now let's get off this stupid planet! *muttering* So much for the planet of love.
*The spaceship takes off from Venus. Anon puts his Venus rock alongside his piece of the Mercury meteorite.*
Anon: I don't EVER wanna go back there! With that kind of heat and weather, it's never a good place to take a vacation!
*Moments later, the spaceship enters the orbit of Earth.*
Sandy: There it is. The Earth.
*Anon takes a picture of the Earth with his camera*
Anon: The third planet. It looks amazing from here. Hmm... What makes this world special and why do we call it home?
Sandy: It's simple, pardner. The Earth's in the right place in the Solar System where it's not too hot and not too cold. It's also got an atmosphere with air that's easy fer us ta breathe.
Anon: There's also the water. We certainly can't live without that! *looks at the Earth again* Earth's the only planet that can support life *quietly* to date. And yet there is so much going on down there. It has tornadoes, hurricanes, earthquakes, volcanoes, tidal waves and those dazzling lights seen in the polar regions. I believe they're called 'aurora'.
*The spaceship passes the Earth and makes way for the Moon*
Sandy: Next stop: the Moon!
Anon: The Moon? Sweet!
*The spaceship lands on the Moon's surface before Sandy and Anon exit.*
Sandy: It's one small step fer a squirrel.
Anon: And one giant leap for humankind!
*They continue walking on the Moon*
Sandy: *sighs happily* It's great ta be back!
Anon: You know this place?
Sandy: Are ya kiddin? I've been here three times.
Anon: *counts his fingers quietly* "Sandy's Rocket", "Mooncation" and "Goons on the Moon". Yep, she did go to the Moon three times.
*Anon hums happily as he skips on the Moon. Just then a space rock appears and knocks him off the surface.*
Sandy: Oh no!
*Sandy throws a lasso at Anon and pulls him back to the surface.*
Anon: Thanks for saving me... again.
Sandy: No problem, pardner.
*Sandy hums her little tune and Anon whistles his tune as they continue walking on the Moon. Just then, Anon sees a Moon buggy.*
Anon: *gasps* Look at this! Someone left a space car here!
Sandy: That there's a Moon wagon! Come on! Let's take it fer a ride!
Anon: Okay.
*Anon sits in the passenger seat of the Moon buggy while Sandy sits in the driver's seat*
Anon: You sure this thing still works?
*Sandy drives the Moon buggy at a quick speed*
Anon: I stand corrected.
*They ride the Moon buggy across the surface*
Anon: WOOHOO!
Sandy: YEEHAW!
Anon: This is awesome!
Sandy: *laughs* This is rootin' tootin' good fun!
*The Moon buggy jumps over several Moon craters before stopping somewhere on the surface. Moments later, Anon and Sandy are seen laying on the surface, watching the stars.*
Anon: *sighs happily* This is what a space trip is all about. Ain't that right, Miss Cheeks?
Sandy: Yeah. Y'know, pardner, sometimes it's nice ta sit back and just watch the stars roll by.
Anon: The sheer beauty of the universe.
*They both sigh in relaxation.*
Anon: *points upwards* Do you know what thing is up there? Looks like a concoction of dark clouds and a bright glow.
Sandy: What yer starin' at is a part of our galaxy the Milky Way.
Anon: Come to think of it, it does look like a river of milk. *silence* Hmm... There's so much I don't know about the Moon. Like how does it control the tides on Earth?
*They sit up*
Sandy: Oh, it's very simple. The Earth's tides are controlled by the Moon's gravity. If the Moon is pulled out of its regular orbit, it could have DISASTROUS effects on the tides!
Anon: Ooh. I don't like the idea of the Moon going out of its orbit. Here's a fact I know about this place. The Moon's phases happen when a part of it is lit up by the sun as it orbits the Earth. Sometimes the Moon passes between the Earth and the Sun, blocking it out for a few minutes. We call that event a 'solar eclipse'. I'm not sure if the people of Bikini Bottom saw one of those before, but I believe they did. *pause* Hey. If a person got crazy on the Moon, they would be a 'luna-tic'!
Sandy: *chuckles* Yer good at them there jokes!
Anon: *sighs happily* This space adventure is going good so far. Nothing can ruin it.
*Meanwhile, a flying saucer carrying two aliens named Glorp and Blorg appears in front of the Moon*
Glorp: Over a hundred moons, Blorg. And one that is perfect for our vacation. Got the space stereo fired up?
Blorg: Oh. Uh...
Glorp: Did you forget to pack it?
Blorg: Sorry, Glorp.
Glorp: *sighs* Let's just enjoy our little camp out on that moon over there.
*The flying saucer flies towards the Moon. Anon and Sandy are relaxing on the Moon's surface until Anon sees the saucer pass by*
Anon: *gasps* I just saw a flying saucer!
Sandy: Calm down, pardner! It's just an asteroid.
Anon: I swore I could had saw something. *gets up* Look over there!
*Sandy gets up and spots the two aliens from the distance.*
Sandy: A-ha! Aliens! I knew it! SpongeBob was right all along! Let's get 'em!
Anon: Right!
*They run to where the aliens are. Glorp and Blorg notice them coming*
Glorp: We got Earth creatures inbound, Blorg!
Blorg: Looks like a human and a rodent. They don't pose any sort of threat.
Glorp: I don't know, Blorg. They could be dangerous. *sighs* Let's just greet them and get back to our vacation.
Blorg: Uh... Okay.
*The two aliens stand still just as Anon and Sandy arrive at their vacation spot*
Anon: At last! First contact!
Glorp: Greetings, Earth dwellers. I'm Glorp and this is my brother Blorg.
Blorg: Uh... Hello.
Sandy: Explain yerselves, ya slippery varmints!
Anon: Yeah! State your business!
Glorp: We are two aliens spending a vacation on this rock. We were having good fun 'til you two showed up!
Anon: Now that you mentioned it, a camp out on the Moon does seem nice.
Sandy: Yeah- Wait just a minute, Mr. Alien! Nobody fools a squirrel from Texas!
Glorp: I-It's not what you think!
Sandy: *angrily* Don't ya play coy with me! We know you two are campin' out on the Moon just so ya can invade Earth the next day! And we're not gonna take that sittin' down!
Anon: You can't fool us! I saw those movies!
Glorp: No really. We're just having a good time!
Anon: My teacher Sandy Cheeks and I are trying to have a fantastic space trip and you two are NOT gonna ruin it! And that is why we're asking you to leave this place!
Glorp: You want us to leave right now? *grows mad* That's not gonna happen, human! We're here to have a relaxing break! So why don't you and the squirrel just back off?!
Anon: And what if we don't?
Glorp: You'll leave us no choice but to take extreme measures! Deploy the Vaporizer 3000, Blorg!
Blorg: Uh... I forgot to pack it.
Glorp: Again?! Oh well, we'll just use these ray blasters. Setting them to maximum power!
*Glorp and Blorg aim the ray guns at Anon and Sandy*
Anon: Mommy?
Sandy: Ma?
Anon: I never thought I'd go out like this. In the hands of an alien.
Sandy: Oh. I'm gonna go ta the big oak tree in the sky.
*The aliens fire the ray blasters at them and they scream and run for shelter. They hide in one of the large craters. Glorp walks past one with a ray blaster in his hand.*
Sandy: We'll stay here 'til they leave us alone.
Anon: Good idea. *loudly* They'll never find us here!
Glorp: Huh?
Sandy: *softly* Shush it! We can't let 'em hear us.
Anon: *softly* Okay, I'll keep quiet.
Sandy: *softly* That's better.
Anon: *looks out from the crater and goes back in* You know. I'm getting pretty tired of being pushed around by these extraterrestrial jerks. I bet they do better karate than the people on Earth.
*Sandy's mind pings with an idea*
Sandy: That's it, pardner! Karate!
Anon: Not a bad idea, Miss Cheeks.
*Glorp and Blorg walk side by side until Anon and Sandy Cheeks jump out the crater in front of them*
Glorp: Oh! Back for more, Earth losers?
Anon: Yes we are! And we challenge you to a karate match!
Glorp: Is that so? Well I gotta warn you two. Me and Blorg are space karate masters!
*Glorp and Blorg put on headbands*
Glorp: You don't have what takes to tangle with us! No human or squirrel can defeat two aliens!
Sandy: Them's fightin' words, Mr. Alien!
Anon: Prepare to lose!
Glorp: Bring it on! *to Blorg* Blorg! Take care of the human!
Blorg: Got it.
*The squirrel and human duo and the two aliens get into their karate stances and charge at each other to begin the fight*
Anon: *to Blorg* Alright, alien! Put 'em up!
*Blorg puts up his fists and tries punching Anon, but Anon dodges Blorg's punches*
Anon: Ha! You missed me! Now it's my turn! Hi-ya!! *punches Blorg* Hi-ya!! *kicks him in the face*
Blorg: Ouch!
*Anon hits Blorg with a karate chop before Blorg counters with a kick. Anon grabs him by the arms and spins him round before throwing him to a crater wall*
Blorg: I knew I should had packed my karate master handbook.
Anon: Take that, alien scum!
Blorg: I'm not done with you yet.
*Blorg gets up and fights Anon again. Meanwhile, Glorp is fighting Sandy. He tries to punch and kick her, but he keeps missing*
Sandy: Y'all got the aim of a cross-eyed armadilla! Hi-ya!! *punches Glorp* Hi-ya!! *karate chops him* Pwaaaaa!! *kicks him, knocking him into a nearby crater*
Glorp: *gets up* Ugh! Alright, chipmunk! You've asked for it!
*Anon and Sandy continue fighting the two aliens until they kick them. The aliens are knocked onto their flying saucer*
Anon: The oldest trick in the book!
*Glorp and Blorg get up*
Sandy: Had enough, dirty aliens?
Glorp: Dirty?! We'll show you dirty once we blow up your puny planet! I'm glad you packed the Obliteratron 2000, Blorg. Begin deployment!
*Glorp deploys the Obliteratron, with sights aiming at Earth*
Anon: Heh. We did a good job. Right?
Sandy: Yep. But now those space critters are gonna destroy the Earth.
Anon: We must do something!
*Sandy spots an exhaust pipe on the Obliteratron*
Sandy: Hmm... *to Anon* You. Distract the aliens. I got an idea!
Anon: Will do.
Glorp: All systems check. Prepare for total annihilation.
*Anon appears in front of the aliens*
Anon: Hey! Look over here!
Glorp: What the? It's that human!
Anon: Look what I can do! *spins around on the spot while the aliens watch*
*Sandy slings an acorn into the exhaust pipe. The machine soon malfunctions*
Glorp: Oh! I knew I shouldn't put the exhaust pipe on the back!
*The Obliteratron explodes. Glorp and Blorg land on the surface*
Glorp: Ugh! Alright! We surrender! We'll leave the Moon right now! *sternly* But mark my words, we'll be back to get revenge!
Anon: Yeah right!
*Glorp and Blorg go back into their UFO and fly off*
Anon: Phew. I'm glad this whole thing is over with. *notices a rock* Hey! A Moon rock!
*Sandy Cheeks rolls her eyes. Later, they are back on the spaceship*
Sandy: Buckle up, pardner. 'Cause you and me is headin' ta Mars!
Anon: Mars. The fourth planet.
*They blast off from the Moon and fly towards the planet Mars. On the way, Anon sees Glorp and Blorg in their flying saucer having some problems*
Glorp: Quick, Blorg! Get me my toolkit! I think the Earth creatures broke something!
Blorg: Uh... Sorry.
Glorp: Don't tell me you forgot it!
*Glorp yells as the flying saucer spins out of control*
Anon: Happy trails, aliens. Those were some the stupidest aliens I've ever seen. I believe they caught the stupid from their friends.
Sandy: Stupidity isn't a virus, but it sure is spreadin' like one.
*They arrive at Mars*
Anon: Ooh. I never saw Mars up close before. I always spot a red speck in the night sky. *takes a picture of it with his camera*
*The spaceship lands on Mars' dusty surface before they exit to explore the planet*
Anon: Wow. This planet is amazing! And the surface looks rusty.
*Sandy scoops up some Martian soil*
Sandy: Just as I thought. This here Martian dirt is colored with red dust.
Anon: Cool. It's no wonder why people call Mars the 'Red Planet'.
*They continue walking on Mars' surface until Anon spots something high up*
Anon: Check it out! A Martian cliff!
Sandy: *whistles* That's taller than a glass of Texas iced tea!
Anon: It's the tallest one I've ever seen. *to Sandy* Hey, Miss Cheeks. I bet you can't beat me to the top!
Sandy: Course I can! No cliff is a match fer a squirrel!
Anon: Sounds like a challenge to me!
Sandy: Yer on! Last one up there's a dizzy sidewinder!
*Anon and Sandy begin racing each other up the Martian cliff. Sandy was in the lead for a few moments before Anon catches up. They soon reach the top, with Anon finishing first*
Anon: Yes! And the crowd goes wild!
Sandy: Well. Looks like yer the winner.
Anon: Thanks! I did some climbing in high school so I have tons of experience. *gazes at the view from the cliff* Wow! Look at that. All those volcanoes and canyons.
Sandy: Mars sure is interestin'.
Anon: Yeah. *looks down* How do we get down from here?
*Sandy is about to slide down the cliff*
Sandy: Hop on my back and we'll go down together!
Anon: Okay!
*Anon gets on Sandy's back and they both slide down the cliff*
Anon: WHEE!
Sandy: Yeah! Ride 'em, cowboy!
*They reach the bottom of the cliff and Anon gets off Sandy.*
Sandy: That was more fun than line dancin' in a barn!
Anon: You said it.
*A Mars rover appears in front of them*
Anon: Aw... A cute little Martian robot.
Sandy: Well. Ain't that an adorable lil' doohickey.
*The rover scans the duo*
Mars Rover: Scanning for intelligent Martian lifeforms. Martian lifeforms detected.
Anon: Hehe. You got it all wrong, little guy. We're not from Mars. We're two visitors from Earth.
*The Mars rover moves closer to them*
Mars Rover: Must capture intelligent lifeforms. *prepares to shoot a net*
Anon: Uh, I think it's trying to kidnap us!
Sandy: Oh no it ain't!
*Sandy walks towards the rover, ready to fight it*
Sandy: Excuse me, pardner.
*Anon winces as Sandy destroys the Mars rover with her karate*
Sandy: One less varmint!
Anon: *looks at the wrecked rover* Man! You got it good! Who was controlling this thing anyway?
*Back in Bikini Bottom, inside the Chum Bucket, it was revealed that Plankton was controlling the rover and was frustrated when it got destroyed*
Plankton: Great! Now how will I know Martians like the taste of chum?! Forget it. I'm going to my next plan to steal the Krabby Patty Formula.
*Back on Mars, Anon and Sandy are walking on the surface*
Anon: You know something. While Mercury is prone to extreme temperatures and Venus has the bad weather, Mars, I think, doesn't have anything that can put us in danger. This planet is perfectly safe.
Sandy: I don't think it's perfectly safe, pardner.
Anon: What do you mean?
Sandy: 'Cause of its orbit, Mars has dust storms worse than what we have in Texas!
Anon: A dust storm? Sounds terrifying. But for now, there's nothing there so it's fine at the moment.
Sandy: Completely.
*A dust cloud begins to form behind them. Anon looks behind*
Anon: I see some clouds rolling in.
Sandy: What are ya talkin' 'bout, pardner? There are no clouds on Mars!
Anon: There aren't any? Wait. If there are no clouds and that formation coming towards us looks like a cloud, that means it's...
*They look behind them and see the dust storm coming*
Anon + Sandy: AAAAAH!!
Sandy: RUN!!
Anon: Head for the shelter!
*They run to a nearby rock to shelter from the dust. They hide behind it, with only Sandy's tail sticking out. Eventually, the dust passes.*
Anon: *gasps* It's all over! We survived!
Sandy: Yeah! *looks at her tail, which is now covered in dust* Aw shoot! I just had my tail done!
*Anon finds a Mars rock and picks it up. Moments later, they are back on the spaceship. Anon was putting his Mars rock alongside the other rocks he collected while Sandy brushes the Martian dust off her tail*
Anon: You know. If it weren't for the frequent dust storms, Mars would had been the safest planet in the Solar System.
Sandy: Yup. But every planet has a dangerous secret.
Anon: Right. Mercury has those meteorite impacts, Venus has its volcanoes, Earth has its disasters and Mars has the dust storms. I wonder what secrets will the outer planets behold?
Sandy: Ya'll find out soon. Now let's get movin'!
*The spaceship takes off from Mars and enters the asteroid belt. Anon notices the asteroids floating around*
Anon: Whoa! I never thought there'd be a place in space with giant floating potatoes!
Sandy: *laughs* This place is called the asteroid belt. It's the belt that separates the inner planets from the outer planets.
Anon: Now that you mentioned it. The giant planets do lie beyond here. *feels uneasy* Some of those asteroids may look small...
*The spaceship gets hit by several asteroids*
Anon: But they pack a mighty punch!
*More asteroids hit the spaceship. One asteroid causes a small hole on top of the ship.*
Sandy: Ah nuts! Stay there and don't touch anything while I'm savin' our skins, okay?
Anon: Roger that.
*Sandy puts on a rocket pack and exits the spaceship. Meanwhile, Anon spots a circular object within the belt*
Anon: *gasps quietly* It's Ceres! The biggest asteroid of all and the only dwarf planet in the asteroid belt. Ooh. It's as big as Texas.
*Sandy finds the tiny hole and repairs it with duct tape*
Sandy: There we go. *reenters the spaceship* Nothin' a lil' duct tape can't handle.
Anon: All it took was duct tape. That must be a very small hole.
*The spaceship exits the asteroid belt and enters the other side of the Solar System. A gigantic planet with a spot on it comes into view. Both Sandy and Anon are shocked by its size*
Sandy: Holy Texas! That there's a big planet!
Anon: It must be Jupiter. *takes a picture of it* The biggest planet in the Solar System, and the fifth one from the Sun. I bet every other planet can fit inside it and still leave some room to spare!
Sandy: Yup. *takes a picture of Jupiter* Interestin' science fact: Jupiter is a planet made of gases and has no solid surface.
Anon: I get it. It's a gas giant and its main gases are hydrogen and helium, which are also found in stars. But it needs to be bigger to become a star itself. *looks at the spot* Poor Jupiter. It's got a huge blemish on its face.
Sandy: That there blemish is a storm known as the 'Great Red Spot'.
Anon: Still, a defining feature nonetheless. Must have been there for a long time.
*Anon notices the spaceship is moving too close to Jupiter*
Anon: Uh, Sandy. We might be FLYING TOO CLOSE TO THE PLANET!
*The spaceship runs out of control due to Jupiter's strong gravitational pull*
Sandy: Oh no! We're bein' lassoed by Jupiter's gravity!
Anon: Pull up! Pull up!
*Sandy grunts as she pulls the spaceship up and steers it away from Jupiter*
Anon: That's a relief. Another minute there and we would had sunk into Jupiter's atmosphere, never to be seen again!
Sandy: It's okay. It was my fault. I shoulda turned off the engines.
Anon: It's fine. *looks at Jupiter* Man! Jupiter has the strongest gravitational pull of any other planet in the system.
Sandy: Yes sir. Jupiter's gravity not only keeps its moons in orbit, but it also helps it protect planets like the Earth from those darn asteroids!
Anon: So not only Jupiter is the king, it's also the inner planets' bodyguard. *keeps an eye on Jupiter and sees one of its moons pass it. Gases are seen expelling from the moon* The moon that looks like a pizza must be very angry with all that steam coming out.
Sandy: Looks ya found one of Jupiter's four main moons. That one there's Io.
Anon: Io. That volcanic moon is weird enough to have a name with just two letters. What are the other three?
*Anon looks through the telescope while Sandy directs him*
Sandy: Well, there's Europa, Ganymede and Callisto.
Anon: Fascinating. Ganymede's a big 'un. It's the biggest moon of all. *to Sandy Cheeks* Hey, I'm getting sorta tired of looking at Jupiter and its big spot. Maybe we should move on and find another planet.
Sandy: Okay, pardner. Here we go!
*The spaceship leaves Jupiter's orbit. Minutes later, they find a yellow planet with a wonderful set of rings*
Sandy: *points to the planet* Right there's Saturn. *gasps in amazement* Ain't it beautiful? *takes a picture of the planet*
Anon: *takes a picture of Saturn* Yeah. No other planet could have such amazing rings as Saturn's. Speaking of which. These rings are not actually solid, they are made of little pieces of rock and ice. Some can be as small as a grain of sand and others can be big as a mountain. *looks both ways* There has to be more to Saturn than just the rings, right?
Sandy: Course there is, pardner. Saturn is one them gas giants. It's lighter than water, which means if it's put into a planet sized sea, it would float 'round like a leaf in a waterhole.
Anon: Nice. It's like Jupiter, but it is smaller and has rings. I wonder what Saturn would look like if its rings disappeared? I believe no one would recognize it.
Sandy: Not ta mention naked.
Anon: Heh. Just like you when you had your fur stolen.
*Sandy gives Anon an unimpressed look*
Anon: Sorry I had to bring that up.
Sandy: It's fine. *gets an idea* Let's see if I can drive this ship 'round the planet.
Anon: Uh, won't that waste fuel?
Sandy: Don't worry none, pardner. We still have just enough fuel ta go 'round Saturn and visit the other planets.
Anon: That's good enough for me.
Sandy: Get ready fer the real 'Tour de Saturn'!
*Sandy drives the spaceship around Saturn 3 times*
Sandy: YEEHAW!!
Anon: WHOA-OA-OA-OA!
Sandy: *stops the spaceship* Wasn't that great?
Anon: Ugh. I feel like I'm gonna be sick. But I did enjoy it.
*Anon spots an icy moon moving in front of Saturn*
Anon: I found another moon!
Sandy: *looks at the icy moon* That there's Enceladus.
Anon: Eucalyptus?
Sandy: *laughs* Enceladus! It's the moon that scientists say might have alien critters hidin' beneath its icy skin.
Anon: Hmm... They said the same thing for Jupiter's moon Europa. And over there *points to an orange moon* is Titan, the only one with an atmosphere like Earth. Check out that one! *points to a weirdly shaped moon* Its name is Hyperion.
Sandy: Golly. Hyperion has more holes than my lil' friend SpongeBob!
Anon: It must be the remains of a moon that got destroyed a long time ago. *silence* I know what the other major moons of Saturn are.
Sandy: Well. What are they?
Anon: There's Mimas, the one that looks an eyeball. There's also Dione, Iapetus, Rhea and Tethys.
Sandy: Mm-mm. Ya sure know yer moons!
Anon: Thanks.
*Just then, an icy rock with a bright tail zooms past Saturn.*
Sandy: O.M. Jehoshaphat! Ya don't see that everyday!
Anon: That's a comet! I wonder which way it came from.
Sandy: Hmm... *points to the direction the comet came from* That way!
*The spaceship blasts away from Saturn's orbit to follow the direction the comet came from. It ends up near a light blue planet.*
Anon: Apparently, the direction has taken us to another planet.
Sandy: *gasps in excitement* We're at Uranus! *takes a picture of the planet*
Anon: *takes a picture* That's Uranus, huh?
Sandy: 'Course it is. It's right there in front of ya.
Anon: Uranus. *laughs at the way the planet is tilted* It's all funny looking. *tilts his head over* Hello, I'm Uranus! I went all sideways and now I'm a stupid ball of gas! *points at Uranus* You're better off in the orbit around Polaris, dumb planet!
*Sandy gets mad and grabs Anon*
Sandy: What did ya say?!
Anon: Uranus is a dumb planet?!
Sandy: Look, mister! If ya make fun of a planet again, I'll be on ya like a horsefly on a cracker barrel! *shows a red karate glove*
Anon: I'm sorry, Miss Cheeks! Please don't hurt me with your karate! Uranus is just my least favorite of the eight planets, that's all.
*Sandy puts Anon down*
Anon: It may not be my absolute favorite, but Uranus is an interesting ball of gas.
*The spaceship flies through the methane clouds of Uranus*
Anon: Nice. As far as I know, the clouds contain methane gas, which give Uranus its blue color.
*The spaceship flies away from Uranus. Anon investigates the planet's moons*
Anon: Another fact. Uranus' moons are Oberon, Titania, Ariel, Umbriel and that bizarre one named Miranda. *points to Miranda*
Sandy: Golly! It's more damaged than a barn in a Texas twister!
Anon: It looks as though a great force stitched that moon back together. Got another fact about good ol' Uranus?
Sandy: Sure do. Uranus is awful stinky with the smell of rotten acorns.
Anon: It's more like the stench of rotten eggs, I but see your point. Uranus reeks! *retches*
*Later, the spaceship arrives at a dark blue planet*
Anon: Sweet Neptune! It's Neptune! The eighth planet. *takes a picture of Neptune with his camera*
Sandy: Darn right it is! *takes a picture* Neptune is the fourth biggest planet in the Solar System, not ta mention the coldest.
Anon: Yeah. And the winds on Neptune go as fast as the speed of sound!
Sandy: Shee-yoot! That's speedy!
*Anon spots a dark storm on Neptune's surface*
Anon: Hey, look! Neptune has a storm just like Jupiter. Only time this time, it's dark instead of red.
*The spaceship flies past Neptune and then its main moon*
Sandy: Right now, we're flyin' past Neptune and its moon Triton.
Anon: Nice. Triton is named after the son of Neptune, the king of the sea.
*The spaceship reaches a small icy world named Pluto*
Sandy: There it is.
Anon: What is it?
Sandy: This is Pluto!
Anon: Pluto. *sighs sadly* Poor little guy.
Sandy: What is the matter, pardner?
Anon: *sadly* I've grown up knowing that icy rock was the NINTH planet. Even the teachers at my elementary school said so. Then it happened. Those mean old astronomers gave it the boot, saying it's not a planet anymore, just a stinking dwarf planet!
Sandy: Hey. Take it easy! Pluto's nothin' ta get so worked up 'bout!
Anon: Yeah. But just looking at it. So lonesome. Left there without its friends Neptune, Saturn and Mars. *tearfully* It breaks my heart.
*Sandy looks at Pluto and begins to feel sad. Tears start to form in her eyes*
Sandy: Y'know somethin', pardner? It breaks my heart too.
Anon: Oh, Pluto! They shouldn't had demoted you in the first place! *cries*
Sandy: They shoulda never treated ya like cow manure! *cries*
*Both Anon and Sandy cry, causing both their helmets to start filling up with their tears.*
Anon: Why, Pluto? WHY?!
Sandy: I never cried this much since I lost my last rodeo!
*They hug each other as they continued crying. Anon wept while Sandy sobbed heavily.*
Anon: I wish there is something we can do to help Pluto!
Sandy: There's nothin' we can do! *cries*
Anon: There must be a way! *stops crying and thinks about something* I got it! The criteria for dwarf planets says that in order for a space object to be a planet, it has to be round, it has to not be a moon, it has to orbit the Sun and the neighborhood around the object has to be clear of any debris. Pluto is located in the Kuiper Belt, so it has rocks surrounding it. But what can we do? It's not like we can pull it out of the Kuiper Belt.
*Sandy stops crying when an idea pops into her head*
Sandy: Maybe we can!
*Sandy takes out a flusher handle and gives one to Anon. They pull them down on their helmets to flush out their tears*
Anon: How?
Sandy: It's simple, pardner. We can just lasso Pluto and pull it outta the Kuiper belt!
Anon: Pluto is such a big rock, though. You sure it would work?
Sandy: Course it will. When I visited the Moon with my Science Scouts, SpongeBob pressed the launch button by mistake and moved the Moon outta its regular orbit. Pluto's smaller than the Moon, so it should be easy ta move.
Anon: That's good enough for me. Let's rescue this icy world!
*Seconds later, the spaceship is on Pluto's surface. Anon looks out as Sandy has an anchor at the ready*
Anon: Ready? Set. NOW!
Sandy: Hi-ya!! *throws the anchor at Pluto, which then hooks itself on one of the mountains* Gotcha!
*Sandy goes back to her seat. The spaceship starts to fly away with the anchor still on Pluto*
Anon: Is it working?
Sandy: Almost. Just a lil' more Southern elbow grease!
*The spaceship pulls on the anchor and Pluto begins to move. Charon, Pluto's moon, follows the dwarf planet*
Anon: IT'S WORKING!
Sandy: Yeehaw!
*The spaceship pulls Pluto out of the Kuiper Belt. Astronomers in Bikini Bottom see this happening*
Astronomer 1: Am I seeing this correctly?
Astronomer 2: Yes. Apparently, Pluto has been pulled out of the Kuiper Belt.
Astronomer 1: Fascinating. Wait. If it's out of the Kuiper Belt, then it now has a clear neighborhood. *ticks off the 'clear neighborhood' box* Exciting news, everyone! Pluto's been reclassified as a planet!
*All the astronomers cheer*
Astronomer 3: I knew this day would come. *blows a tissue*
*Back in space, the spaceship is still pulling Pluto*
Anon: A little more... Perfect! Right there!
*The spaceship stops*
Anon: Whew! How's ol' Pluto doing in its new place in the Solar System?
*Sandy Cheeks looks at the monitor and sees that Pluto's orbit has changed*
Sandy: Not too bad. It's a lil' closer ta Neptune.
Anon: You're right. But they shouldn't smash into each other anytime soon. *looks at the communicator on his wrist* Great news, Sandra!
Sandy: What is it?
Anon: Astronomers have said that PLUTO'S A PLANET AGAIN!
Sandy: *gasps* We did it!
Anon: Yeah! The Solar System's back to having nine planets. Just the way it should be!
Sandy: We saved Pluto!
Anon: Yay! *silence* Uh, is this planet the last stop of the tour?
Sandy: Darn tootin'!
*The spaceship lands on Pluto, with the anchor still on the surface. On the spaceship, Anon and Sandy are wearing warm coats and drinking hot chocolate. They get whipped cream on their faces. Sandy sneezes the cream onto her helmet and licks it off.*
Anon: Mmm mmm. This hot chocolate's really good! *licks the whipped cream off his face*
Sandy: Thank you. I made it myself.
Anon: Well, you sure know how to make a great drink!
*Moments later, they step on Pluto's icy surface. Anon could not believe his eyes.*
Anon: Whoa! It's like a celestial winter wonderland! All these mountains and glaciers! *spots a very bright but distant star* Look over there! I found the Sun!
Sandy: That's the Sun? I'm as confused as a bull on Astroturf.
Anon: It's definitely the Sun! But because Pluto's so far away, it's nothing more than a dim star, *quietly* like Patrick.
*Anon looks behind him and sees that Sandy has set up her telescope and is observing space*
Anon: What are you doing?
Sandy: Oh, I'm just takin' a gander at Pluto's ol' neighbors in the Kuiper Belt.
Anon: Other dwarf planets, huh? Mind if I take a look?
Sandy: Sure, why not?
*Sandy steps aside and Anon looks through the telescope*
Anon: Incredible. *looks at Haumea* There's Haumea, the one that looks like an egg! It's got a ring around it! *to Sandy* Don't tell Saturn. *looks at Makemake* Over there is the dwarf planet whose name is pronounced "makay makay". I like its maroon color. *looks at Sedna* That's Sedna, the most distant dwarf planet in the Solar System. *looks at Eris* And right there is... *grows mad* Ugh! Eris. It may be the biggest, but it's still just a dumb rock! If I had some weapons, I could destroy it!
Sandy: *grows mad* What's gotten into you?! Eris ain't done nothin' wrong!
Anon: Oh yeah? Get this! This dwarf planet was responsible for Pluto's downgrading! And that's why I hate it! *notices how cold Pluto is* Man! This place is colder than a cactus in the middle of January!
Sandy: Hmm... Not a bad attempt at a Texas saying.
Anon: Thanks. Even though I'm not from Texas. I actually live in-
Sandy: Hold that thought, pardner! 'Cause it's time fer some snowboarding!
Anon: Go snowboarding on Pluto? *silence* Now you're talkin'!
*Seconds later, they are on snowboards on top of a small Plutonian mountain*
Sandy: Yer ready?
Anon: I sure am!
Sandy: Here we go!
Anon: Woohoo!
*They slide down the mountain and fly into the air*
Anon: I got some moves of my own! This one is called the Wormhole! *spins on his side like a corkscrew* Right here is the Cosmic Cartwheel! *does a cartwheel in midair* Next is the Plutonian Ice Breaker! *breaks the top of another mountain with his foot* And last but not least *floats around Pluto's moon Charon* the Charon Cruiser! *goes back to Pluto*
Sandy: Nice moves, pardner. But I betcha can't beat the "Reverse Wormhole"! *spins and hits Anon by mistake* Whoops!
*Anon falls down and rides on his snowboard before he wipes out on a rock and lands on a glacier*
Anon: *gets up* No harm done. Just landed in this Texas-sized glacier! *hears ice cracking* Ah nuts! *falls into the icy glacier*
Sandy: NOOOOOOOO!!
*Anon rises back up in a block of ice*
Sandy: Hold on, pardner! I'll save ya!
*Sandy lassos the ice block out of the icy Plutonian water and pushes it back to the spaceship. She finds a blowtorch and uses it to thaw Anon out of the block of ice.*
Anon: *gasps* Phew! Another minute in that icy cage and I would had gone insane! At least now I know that Pluto has ice cold water. I'm glad you rescued me, Miss Cheeks.
Sandy: Thanks, pardner.
Anon: Let's go back home! We're done here.
*The anchor is lifted back up and the spaceship blasts off from Pluto. It flies at breakneck speed past Neptune, Uranus, Saturn, Jupiter and Mars before reaching Earth*
Sandy: Brace yerself, pardner! It's gonna get bumpy once we hit the atmosphere!
Anon: Oh dear.
*The spaceship reenters the Earth's atmosphere and the nose begins to catch fire*
Sandy: Yeehaw!
Anon: Oh my gosh!
*The fire is put out once the spaceship splashes into the ocean. It makes it back to Bikini Bottom and lands just near the Treedome. Sandy and Anon step out with their suitcases.*
Anon: Racing on Mercury, fighting aliens on the Moon and helping Pluto become a planet again. Now that's what I call a 'space trip'!
Sandy: You said it, pardner! We had a rip-snortin' good time takin' a gander at all the planets.
???: *mutters angrily* Curses!
Sandy: Ya hear somethin'?
Anon: It came from over there.
*They walk closer to the source of the noise and find Plankton.*
Anon: Hey! It's Plankton; Owner of the Chum Bucket.
Plankton: What? *turns around and gasps* It's you!
Anon: What are you saying?
Plankton: I know who you are! You and the squirrel have destroyed my beautiful Mars rover!
*Sandy and Anon both gasp*
Sandy: Plankton! We shoulda known that Martian robot was yer doin'!
Anon: Yeah! That robot tried to capture us!
Plankton: Y-you got it all wrong! My rover thought you two were Martians!
Anon: I don't wanna hear it, Plankton! Get out of my sight!
Plankton: Very well. But one day, revenge will be MINE!
*Anon and Sandy turn around and walk. Anon turns his head and sees Plankton has disappeared*
Anon: Where did he go?
Sandy: Looks like he hightailed it back ta the Chum Bucket.
Anon: I'm sure he did. *notices something* Hey, Sandy. Part of your tail's missing.
Sandy: Huh? *looks at her tail and gasps*
*Anon sees that Sandy is in shock.*
Anon: Oh my. This looks bad. *backs a few steps away and puts some noise-cancelling headphones on his head. Sandy's shock soon turns into anger.*
Sandy: PLANKTOOOOOOON!!
Anon: Oh boy. Wouldn't be the first time Plankton messed with you.
Sandy: *annoyed* Don't push it.
Anon: *meekly* Sorry. Still, it was an amazing journey through outer space.
Sandy: Yup. And I want ya ta have this. *gives a mini teleporter to Anon*
Anon: What's this?
Sandy: It's a teleporter, duh! It lets ya teleport ta Bikini Bottom and back ta yer home in a blink of an eye.
Anon: Cool. Well, I better go back to where was. Thanks for everything, Sands! And the teleporter! *presses the button on the teleporter and he disappears in a flash*
Sandy: Hmm... No one's called me "Sands". Not even SpongeBob or Patrick. *shrugs and walks into the Treedome*
*Anon reappears in his home and removes his spacesuit and helmet before storing it away and putting the teleporter on a shelf*
Anon: Ah... That tour of the Solar System was just perfect. I'll remember it for a long, long time.
*The end*
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Gender Any
Size 120 x 120px
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