selfharm (but everything is fine)


I’m sitting in a surgery class, we started going through mechanical damage and pictures of incised wounds (I won’t attach photos) reminded me of some things...

I don't feel bad about it, everything is fine, I just realized that almost a year has passed..? I’m sitting in the same office with the same teacher, in the same place
But now I'm so much better(?)
I'm scared to remember this, it's like it's not true

Then there was a complete feeling that life was over, I don’t know how to convey how fucking bad it was, sitting in class with my hands bandaged, when last evening I was going to finish everything, looking at the table and feeling nothing but a suffocating severe pain, buying rope for yourself

It seems like I’m really making a smooth recovery, so it wasn’t all in vain