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How 2024 Got Started
Ryo the Samurai Lion: (narrating in English) Hello. My name is Ryo Mizushima. You know me as Ryo the Samurai Lion, the Japanese counterpart to Leo the Patriotic Lion. One question all us lions are frequently asked is an understandable question to ask: "Are all parallels of Leo destined to become heads of state?" Well, no; I don't think so. Some of them, such as Leng the Bokator Lion, don't need to do that because their deadly martial arts are enough to keep the world in line. Others don't need to do it because they are the minor counterparts to the major parallel. What do I mean by that? Well, Leo is the major parallel because the rest of us from the past didn't start appearing in the present time until he was an established hero, and thus, he's the one everybody thinks of when they think of the United States today. The minor parallels, therefore, are the other parallels from the same country, such as Clyde the Calvary Lion, his counterpart from the Old West.
Leo the Patriotic Lion: (narrating) Not all major parallels have a minor parallel, though; in fact, the majority of us don't. But since I am President, there's no need for the others such as Clyde to get involved in politics if they don't want to; they've been represented.
As for those of us who are becoming heads of state, we feel that it's not a question of if it is going to happen, but when it is going to happen.
Ryo: (narrating in English) And now, it was my turn. It's so frustrating, though. The humans don't trust their own race anymore. It's not fair to us members of the animal kingdom because we end up in occupations we never thought we would have. What about the rest of us who don't want to be these things? However, the general rule is to do everything without complaining or arguing, and so we do that.
Scroll down below to see why I'm now the Prime Minister of Japan.
*Later, it's the new year as the world enters 2024. Neon Blade joins Ryo in investigating a couple of low-profile but serious cases in Tokyo Prefecture.*
Neon Blade: *He is in a cafe alone as he drinks some hot chocolate and speaks in Japanese on his communicator to Ryo.* I hope you had a wonderful new year. Sadly, 2023 ended with a few scandals in Japan. The first case we will investigate involves a prominent animation company that is being investigated for breaking labor laws. We will go there but I hope you are ready for some disturbing revelations about it. Second case involves the Kishida Administration and his political party over some slush fund scandals involving his previous ministers. Seems like everybody across Japan have lost trust in our central government but we will deal with Kishida later. But for now, lets visit the animation company in question. Remember, keep your cool but let me speak first to the suspects. You will be allowed to speak afterwards. Are you ready for a busy day today?
Ryo: *in Japanese* I am ready. I just wish these things didn't happen. Every country has their own scandals, and it does not surprise me that such actions have made our people lose faith in the government. It is so sad; the humans do not trust themselves anymore. But yes. Let's get the scenario under control.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Let's get going.
*Neon Blade and Ryo leave the café and later visit an animation company that has police and C.I.D.F. agents in front of it.*
Police 1: *In Japanese* Right this way, sir!
*The police leads Neon Blade and Ryo to a manager, where they take a seat at a table.*
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* There's a lot of police and C.I.D.F. agents here. This usually does not happen often in Japan, especially for an animation company. What happened?
Manager: *In Japanese* Well, a lot of my workers were calling out sick, and I had to take over their work. It's stressful handling that work and working on our company's social media. It's just been stressful.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* I see.
Manager: *In Japanese* You know how people work in the animation industry.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Right. And you mentioned social media. I want to show you something. *He pulls out a folder and opens it on the table.* Does any of this look familiar to you?
Manager: *In Japanese as he looks over the folder and its contents.* A little. What does this have to do with anything going on now?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* These are social media posts from your workers. Does any of this sound like something a person of sound mind would say online?
Manager: *In Japanese* Well, stress is part of work, you know. You already know how things work in Japan.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* I do, actually, and what you are doing violates Japanese labor law. The manager is the leader of his team and is responsible for the wellbeing of his workers. Your workers have been complaining about the work environment affecting their health. Let me read some stuff out to you from them.
"If I don't get a raise or new job, I may consider ending my life as my legacy will only be a name in some anime's credits scene."
"I hate working 50 hours a week! The trade job workers here live a better life than I do! My existence is a mistake!"
"My company gives me no love ,and I wished to marry a man so I will never have to work for someone again. I rather spend my life with a man and our children for free than to be a slave for scraps of yen."
"City life for an animation company is a mistake. I want to move to a town and start my own business and family. If I can't do that, what's the point of living."
"I hope our viewers from around the world sees my message before I leave this world soon, because we slave for your entertainment."
"It's just anime! Our fans are begging us to delay it for our mental health! Is our boss going to listen?"
"It sucks that pornographic animators make less than we do! I want to wither away in Aokigahara Forest with a message of my fate hung over my chest!"
"The world's work cultures have changed! Why can't Japanese work culture change for our health?!"
"They won't even let me work form home, so I have to come in with a cold over this! Did they forget about COVID-19 already?!"
"Show biz is for the birds if this is what it's coming to. I want my old life back."
Now. Do you see how concerning this is?
Manager: *In Japanese* Then why are there so many cops and C.I.D.F. agents here?!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* When several people at a workplace report being ill at once like this, it is considered a public health issue. Public health issues require investigation and this is one of them. We don't know if germs are being spread here or not, but when you let people come in with colds like that, especially after dealing with COVID-19, this is extremely concerning.
Manager: *In Japanese* As for you two?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Please do not argue. G-52s investigate public health issues in their countries, too. Your workers reported being sick, and you threatened to fire them over this, despite evidence of them providing you their doctors' notes.
Manager: *In Japanese* Fire them?! Are you insane?! I told them I would find ways to make them motivated even if it involves shaming them in front of others by having them sit in the corners! You also know that in Japanese work culture, our office workers work until they fall asleep at work and that's a sign of a productive worker who contributes to society well!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Work culture changes to prevent these things. We also have evidence that government officials encouraged you to allow your workers to work from home, especially during winter time. You ignored their suggestions. You let workers work themselves until they're ill, putting other people at risk in public-
Manager: *In Japanese* Ryo has no problem with our work culture, because we always contribute well to our society and the world!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Do not argue! As a manager, you also have the responsibility to look over the well-being of your workers, as per Japanese labor law.
Manager: *In Japanese* But our viewers-
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Your viewers are more concerned about the health of your workers than the anime shows your company produce. And why are you arguing in front of Ryo?
Manager: *In Japanese* Is he allowed to have an opinion on this case like you are? Does he know anything about the animation industry in Japan?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* One of the politicians in our National Diet is part of that industry and seeks to improve working conditions in this. *To Ryo in Japanese* Did you want to say anything to this manager before the authorities take care of him?
Ryo: *in Japanese* What do you mean, "Am I allowed to have an opinion?" Of course I am. You're right to say that I know almost nothing about that stuff, but we'd be saying the same thing to you if you were manager of a supermarket. If your workers call in sick, don't lay them off! Let them heal; they'll come back! If you're that concerned about productivity and making money, you got your head screwed on backwards. And as my colleague here has said, the health is more important; the viewing public is willing to settle for reruns or watching old episodes on DVD.
Manager: *In Japanese* Head screwed on backwards? You come from the Edo Period! The samurai knows nothing of the small details of this modern world like here!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* You're solely mistaken.
*The police handcuff the manager.*
Manager: *In Japanese* What is going on?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* The samurai is the warrior who defends his people with the greatest honor so they can continue to enjoy their lives in peace. He puts his life on the line first and foremost before the others. Ryo defends our great nation so our people can continue to live their lives. The samurai does not choose to defend his nation to let his people suffer at home.
Police 2: *In Japanese* Okay; let's go.
*The manager complies as the police takes him to the police cab to book him in jail for violating labor laws.*
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* This is going to be a long day. Now, we meet our Prime Minister.
Ryo: *in Japanese* Understood. I have a sad feeling I know what's coming.
*Neon Blade and Ryo later visits the National Diet to visit Kishida.*
Kishida: *In Japanese* I know why you're here. You knew what happened, didn't you?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Had a rough ending for last year, didn't you?
Kishida: *In Japanese* It was horrible! Our people lost trust in my administration and there's people singing and protesting against me! They were furious!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Bad day, I see. So what happened?
Kishida: *In Japanese* Some of our ministers got exposed in a slush fund scandal, and people say that we do not do a good job vetting our ministers. I thought every person I appointed was vetted, but I was wrong! This isn't the Japan I wanted. Everything was going well... But it seems people are mad. My political party lost trust, and many of my colleagues resigned, opening the doors to radical people, or in some other cases, those Forsythian animals. There's people who demand radical changes in modern work life, people with ultranationalist ideology mixed with national self-sufficient policies, and people who believe in radical economic changes where men have major influence over the economy and that Japanese women should be rewarded for faithful motherhood. I did everything I could but many want me out. And some claim that I plan to hike taxes later as others call for radical changes of our tax policies to be decentralized as much as possible.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Wow... That is a lot. You do what you have to do to fix your party and reputation. But I don't know what advice I can give.
Kishida: *In Japanese* No need for you to give me any advice, because I already found a solution for Japan's woes. That solution is with you. He is right here. I will resign as Prime Minister and let Ryo take my place as my successor. *To Ryo* I have failed to maintain public confidence. Our people call upon you to lead us to a better future. I'm sure you heard about the slush fund scandals of my ministers not being vetted properly before they took their jobs. Did you want to say something to me before I leave? Seeing that you're a samurai, the least I can ask for is mercy on my life since you have no tolerance for dishonesty.
*Civilians are protesting outside.*
Civilian 1: *In Japanese* Maximize working from home! Our current corporate culture is outdated and unsustainable!
Civilian 2: *In Japanese* Decentralize our taxes and increase government transparency and vetting policies! My yen should fuel our nation's growth not fill the pockets of liars!
Civilian 3: *In Japanese* Support our culture and arts more! Modern life must change with the world to increase our flexibility in life more!
Civilian 4: *In Japanese* Simply telling corporations to increase our pay isn't helping! Encourage our corporations to maximize work from home technologies so we can manage our lives more easily and still maintain maximum productivity!
Civilian 5: *In Japanese* Come on, Japan! Let us be more open to new innovative ideas that actually improves our nation more! We used to be pioneers in software engineering at least and now the Americans beat us in it!
Civilian 6: *In Japanese* Want small businesses to grow? Support their married owners in having as many children as possible! Use that tax money for that more!
Civilian 7: *In Japanese* Make local holidays and festivals official local holidays as well!
Civilian 8: *In Japanese* And put Ryo in office!
Ryo: *in Japanese* I had a feeling this was going to happen; all my counterparts are gaining office, so it wasn't a question of if, but when, it was going to happen. The humans don't trust their own race anymore. But there was absolutely no reason for that slush fund scandal to happen; you people know better than that. Or you should, but didn't. You're right to say I have no tolerance for dishonesty. But I also have no tolerance for people that act as if it is illegal to use common sense. I do not wish to know whether or not you actually would have hiked the taxes or not, but there's no reason our yen should be filling the pockets of those who deceive us. Our royal family is very disappointed with your administration, even if you yourself had nothing to do with some of these things.
The people want you out and me in; now it is time to grant that wish. Goodbye.
*Kishida resigns. Ryo's presence then silences the crowd of protestors as other random Forsythians replace the other human ministers that were involved in the scandal.*
Ryo: *in Japanese through a megaphone* If your wish was for the corrupt humans to get kicked out and replaced with us members of the animal kingdom, it has just been granted. I did not want the job as Prime Minister, but now I have it.
*Everybody cheers as a group of teens do the following shout in unison for the cameras from their friends' phones. Little do they know, Super Shogun, a Japanese G-52 of Forsythian origin, is behind them to go with the flow.*
Group of Teens and Super Shogun: SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!
Super Shogun: *In Japanese* That was good!
Teen 1: *In Japanese* Oh! I didn't know you were here!
Teen 2: *In Japanese* Hello again, as always!
Super Shogun: *In Japanese* Yes, and thanks! Let me go with Ryo and see what needs to be done.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* I guess I'll be Japan's ambassador to America, then.
Politician 1: *In Japanese* I was going to say that. Then we'll have Yamazaki be our ambassador to Canada.
Politician 2: *In Japanese* This is going to be a busy day, but things will be fine. Our tax system is a mess, so let's simplify and decentralize it.
Politician 3: *In Japanese* I like the idea of maximizing work-from-home corporate jobs. Helps to save up resources without sacrificing productivity.
Politician 4: *In Japanese* That and if you look at the work culture of other countries, the managers are also team players. The kohei-sensei corporate system is obsolete and we must embrace this change so our people can be more happy and productive.
Yamazaki: *In Japanese* Western countries are usually the ones that have the manager-team player system.
Politician 5: *In Japanese* In Sweden, the manager is only the representing leader of the group and are typically paid on the same salary level as their members. We must allow our companies to adopt new ideas like this to increase our productivity. There's so much that needs to change in Japan for the better.
Politician 6: *In Japanese* South America has enormous ethnic Japanese communities there and many of them desire to immigrate here to return to their roots. Let's make it easier for them so they can raise their families across Japan in peace.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Sounds like you got everything, Ryo. However, be careful with our censorship policies because some policies can be vague and others are already controversial. But asides from that, I think you got this.
Ryo: (narrating in English) Of course I got this under control. Meanwhile, here's what was going on back in the USA.
*Pearland, TX, USA*
*Wrangler Wolf and his fellow Texans fans are watching the Texans vs Browns game and are going nuts because the Texans are scoring so much against the Browns.*
Wrangler Wolf: Did he just do a pick-six?! Did that just happen?!
Civilian 1: What is even happening right now?! They said we had no chance against the Browns! Oh, yeah; CJ, my boy! That's how you do it!
Civilian 2: WHOOOOOOOOO! Nico Collins! Yeah that's how you do it!
Wrangler Wolf: WE JUST CLENCHED THE PLAYOFFS! LET'S GO, TEXANS! LETS GO BABY YEAH! *Oh his communicator.* TEXANS CLENCHED THE PLAYOFFS! I REPEAT! TEXANS CLENCHED THE PLAYOFFS! OOOOH! *He howls.* YEAH; AMERICA!
Civilian 3: That's it! It's over for the Browns! They're gone! We beat them by a blowout!
*Washington D.C.*
Zax: *He is drinking tea and suddenly spews the tea out of his mouth everywhere.* TEXANS DID WHAT?!
Mechayote: No way! Leo! Your Detroit Lions just clenched the playoffs! I think we're going to have a Texans vs Lions Super Bowl!
Frank C.: Do you have any idea how many people are going to be in Vegas if that happens? That will mean enormous marching band parades of both teams that would make the last furry-themed Super Bowl game look tiny in comparison!
Jack: Oh, great; if that happens, that's a crowd crush risk. Hopefully, Vegas has plenty of help to prevent that with all those C.I.D.F. agents coming there when that happens.
*Wrangler Wolf calls Juno on the G-52 app.*
Wrangler Wolf's Voice: We clenched the playoffs, y'all! And I would love to see the Texans take on the Lions in the Super Bowl! That's me against Leo there, y'know, but we ain't mad about it when that happens.
Juno: You're more than invited to join Leo in his suite to watch that game together if that happens. But, man; your quarterback is something else! I thought he was just a mere rookie with too little experience to deal with the others.
Wrangler Wolf's Voice: Stroud is God's answer and blessing to Houston. We prayed for our Texans and He delivered! He may be young with a rough childhood, but he's a fighter! The universe was stacked against him but he ain't afraid to take it on.
Zax: You got an excellent quarterback for once! He left Tom Brady in the dust!
*Wildcat City, KS, USA*
Civilian 1: I wouldn't be surprised if the Texans beat the Chiefs. They put together a great team that understands teamwork well.
Civilian 2: Wait, they clenched the playoffs?! I thought they didn't have a chance! The analysts were wrong!
Civilian 3: They even used A.I. to gather the data against the Texans, and yet, they proved them wrong. These analysts look like they owe the Texans public apologies.
Civilian 4: I've been following Stroud for a bit. That right there, he's a prime example of an NFL role model. Win or lose, he will walk home as Houston's ultimate champion. Everybody now knows him.
Super C: (narrating) The other moral to that story is don't use A.I. for something like that; it's a waste of time, energy, and data. That's my opinion, anyway. But it's true; the Texans won the game in question, and made all the sports analysts eat their words.
*American Embassy, Stockholm, Sweden*
Konrad: *Is watching football on TV.* No! No way! These Texans are so good! But how? None of these guys seem like they're famous for anything. They beat the Browns by a blowout! My respect to the Texans then! They earned it!
Embassy Staff 1: The analysts said they had no chance, but they proved us wrong.
Embassy Staff 2: I thought Stroud having a low S2 score would basically keep the Texans' status quo as being among the worst teams in the NFL, and boy, was I wrong! They got an excellent head coach!
Konrad: The Texans knew what they were doing...
*Cleveland, OH, USA*
*The entire city goes silent as some civilians slowly clap for the Texans.*
Civilian 1: You know what? They deserved that win and our respect!
Civilian 2: For a rookie, that was impressive! I wish them luck to the Super Bowl then!
Civilian 3: Wow; they humiliated us big time! Big respect to them though in proving the analysts wrong!
Civilian 4: The Texans had the whole world against them and beat us in the playoffs like we were nothing!
Civilian 5: Who exactly is CJ Stroud, and why is he so darn good?! I thought he was a nobody!
Civilian 6: I think the sports analysts are more humiliated by the fact that the Texans proved them wrong at their jobs.
Civilian 7: I ain't mad! You deserved that win! My respects bro!
*Japan*
Ryo: *in Japanese* I promise to respect that. The censorship policies, I mean; I'll probably be asking for advice about matters like that, as well as the productivity matter. After all, greed destroys people.
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: It's about time we see Detroit clench. *His communicator beeps.* Oh, and this just in: due to a variety of scandals surrounding the Japanese Prime Minister, he resigned, and now Ryo has the job. So we'll be getting a new ambassador shortly.
*WC, KS, USA*
Super C: The Chiefs have won it a couple times in the last few years. It's someone else's turn now unless fate decides otherwise, but one thing is certain. The dominance we've seen from the coastal teams in being in the Super Bowl to start with seems to have shifted to middle America.
*Washington D.C., USA*
Zax: Now Japan has your parallel in charge, too.
Juno: I wasn't expecting that, but Japan needed some changes.
Marshall: Starting with their idea of corporate work culture, which is outdated! In America, managers are team players.
Zax: I think Japan will improve drastically under Ryo now that the samurai lion is in charge.
Leo: (narrating) They will indeed. We now shift our attention to what was happening in the NFL, and how people reacted to it. Sadly, Philadelphia had to discover that they weren't the only ones with terrible sports fans, but they should learn a lesson from it, for the real-life versions of the major league sports mascots allied with the G-52s (including Swoop, the Eagles mascot) had been campaigning to get their people to behave. Now they could use this to say to the public, "Do you see what you started?"
It wasn't a first, though; what was supposed to be a victory parade for Dallas in 1993 after the Super Bowl win that year resulted in violence in the end. It was one of the first major cases, I've been asked to point out, where CNG ramped up the number of humans it was killing for such behavior, but at the time, nobody knew what was happening. Everybody thought it was just God punishing the earth for turning their back on Him. (In a way, by letting CNG do what it did, He was also punishing the Earth that way. It just wasn't until the 2010's that CNG really got out of control, and when it ceased to exist in 2022, it was during the period we are in now, where Christanity's numbers are rising at an alarming rate, and the other religions are losing numbers just as alarmingly.)
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*The Texans vs Ravens game begins.*
Wrangler Wolf: Y'know, it's a good thing that Houston and nearby towns got more Texans fans, but man; them Cowboys fans are nuts! This year, they went cuckoo to the point that Philly and Patriots fans got nothin' on them!
Ravens Fan 1: I saw some videos of those Coowboys fans. One of them punched a female Packers fan. Likems come on! Guys shouldn't hit women like that literally!
Ravens Fan 2: Talk about a record low!
Wrangler Wolf: Y'all want record low? Back in Pearland, hardcore Cowboys fans were dropping more f-bombs and d-bombs than Louis Loserberg for a whole week compared this his entire life! In Dallas, fools be tossin' TVs and Cowboys merch out the window onto the streets! And to top it off, they get extremely jealous about our team making it here!
Cripto: (narrating) Towards the end of his life, Louis was so angry, he was yelling almost 200 swear words a minute. That's the context Wrangler Wolf was referring to here. However, these fans overtook that record big time. It led Wildcat City to still show less overall interest in the NFL, and instead turn its attention to the NBA and NHL. The NBA in particular is suffering; its television viewing ratings are at an all-time low. Yet they play on, thanks to the motivational factor that basketball was Caticon's national sport.
Ravens Fan 2: Dude; that's horrible!
Texans Fan 1: We're just thankful to be here. All we prayed for was to have a good quarterback and we are here, which we didn't expect.
Texans Fan 2: Them Cowboys fans were so jealous of us, they have been betting against us to lose. When they make it to the playoffs, we wish them luck, but since they want to be jerks, then we'll treat them as such.
Texans Fan 3: I was hoping we'd get an all-Texas Super Bowl, but an all-furry themed Super Bowl is more likely instead, which is Texans vs Lions.
Ravens Fan 3: Las Vegas would be jam-packed to the brim if that happens!
Raven Fan 4: I have to admit that I underestimated your team. This isn't the Texans from the first game. This is a whole different beast!
*Dallas, TX, USA*
*Civilians put up with mad Cowboys fans screaming and crying over their team losing to the Green Bay Packers as some watch the Texans vs Ravens game in jealousy.*
Mad Cowboys Fan 1: *Cries as he watches his TV.* OH; WHYYYYY! WHY DO THESE ROOKIES DO BETTER THAN MY TEAM?! WHYYYYYY?!
Mad Cowboys Fan 2: No fair! Dak Prescott, my butt!
Civilian 1: Hey; shut up! It's just a game!
Civilian 2: I've heard you day in and day out about your Cowboys and how the Texans are better than our team! Enough already! The Texans actually did something, unlike our team!
Mad Cowboys Fan 3: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! We've had Prescott for years, and the Texans only have a rookie fresh from college for less than a year; yet they made it to divisionals! It's not fair! Even their head coach is new and already we look like garbage because of those Texans! Screw the Packers! I will not eat cheese until next season!
Civilian 3: Shut up and hide your freaking face!
Civilian 4: Go burn another Prescott jersey, you loser!
Civilian 5: Prescott this! Prescott that! Cowboys this! Cowboys that! Packers this! Packers that! Texans this! Texans that! Just shut up!
Mad Cowboys Fan 4: I hope the Texans lose! This is nonsense!
Mad Cowboys Fan 5: *Throws eggs and cheese at some effigies of various Dallas Cowboys football players.* Screw you Prescott and Bryant! You play like garbage! *He accidentally eggs a neighbor's house during his fit of rage.*
Civilian 6: Dude! You just egged my house! Get over it and move on!
Mad Cowboys Fan 5: Texans humiliated us! We got humiliated by rookies and amateurs!
Civilian 6: So what? They worked and played hard for this and are worthy of deserving respect!
*Houston, TX, USA*
*Several more civilians become full-time Texans fans.*
Civilian 1: See? You got more reasons to be a Texans fan!
Civilian 2: Our city is healing! More of us are displaying Texans flags and banners, too!
Civilian 3: *praying* Dear Lord, please guide our team to victory, and please forgive the people of Dallas.
Civilian 4: Too bad we still have too many angry Cowboys fans here. Just ignore them and let the problem take care of themselves.
Mad Cowboys Fan 1: Stupid team! *He throws his Cowboys merchandise in a box.* You're only good for campfire!
Mad Cowboys Fan 2: Jerry Jones you disappoint me!
Civilian 5: *He uses his phone to safely record the mad Cowboys fans.* Just let these guys vent. Let them destroy their stuff. Let them destroy their TVs too. That's their stuff.
Civilian 6: At this rate, these angry Cowboys fans are going to make Cody become a Texans fan instead, since, just like Wrangler Wolf, he won't put up with this childish nonsense!
*Washington, D.C., USA*
*Juno and Zax wear Texans fan clothing to show off in.*
Zax: Jack, this is supposed to look good on us?
Jack: Yup! I tossed out my Seahawks gear because the Texans know what they're doing! See? They don't look bad on you.
Juno: Zax and I are glad we're not in Dallas after seeing videos of Cowboys fans going crazy that they make Philly Eagles fans look tame in comparison.
Zax: It's just a game and the Texans deserved their victory! If the Cowboys could get their heads together, they would've been in the divisionals, but no! They're too egotistical to think like that! Stroud is a true role model of how NFL players should strive to be! He is smarter than Prescott and he proved it!
Juno: I don't see Texans fans acting like this when they lose. But, oh, goodness; the jealous attitudes Cowboys fans displayed to the Texans! That's super childish to the max! No wonder why the internet is blowing up with videos of Cowboys fans wrecking their own stuff after losing to the Packers! As for Dallas, nobody can sleep since they have to hear this day in and day out!
Zax: Complete with nonstop profanity that would make Louis Loserberg blush. Wait, I should tell Cripto to avoid Dallas until next season since if my fellow Cowboys fans want to curse and destroy stuff like that as well as to vent their jealous rage at the Texans, then Cripto should avoid that city for a bit so they can vent.
Juno: Cops must be busy there and anger management classes must be full and busy there too.
Marshall: Zax, you should tell Cripto to avoid your city until next season. I've seen the videos of their angry fans and it's bad. Mad Eagles fans got nothing on this! This is entering Lennart the Viking Lion's raid territory mixed with temper tantrums.
Zax: Sure. *He uses his smartphone to call Cripto on his communicator.* Cripto, whatever you do, do not visit Dallas until next NFL season. There's too many crazy Cowboys fans throwing and destroying stuff and are shouting obscenities at the Texans for clenching the playoffs and their team failing to do that.
Juno: I have to tell Cody the same! *He uses his smartphone to call Cody on his communicator.* Cody, you should avoid Dallas until next football season. The Cowboys fans there have gone bonkers and I don't want you firing your guns at them. Let the Dallas police and C.I.D.F. there handle this.
Jack: I wouldn't be surprised if this whole thing causes Cody to become a full-time Texans fan. Stroud is amazing as both a person and a quarterback!
*Dallas, TX, USA*
Civilian 5: Somebody get Cody!
Civilian 6: No, don't. He'll shoot at everybody.
Civilian 7: Are you sure about that? Wait; what's that?
Civilian 8: What?
Civilian 7: Nothing; I think I'm going mental.
*The population runs inside to hide from the mad Cowboys fans. Suddenly, a massive storm begins; this indicates Thunder Fox, Weather Wolf, and Thunder Dog are using their weather powers to put an end to the chaos.*
Thunder Dog: I hate to say it, but I've done the same thing to my own people. Except my football is Aussie rules football.
Thunder Fox: I watched that the other night; that's a crazy game. It's all over the world; there's always somebody who takes their sports way too seriously.
*Super C shows with the C.I.D.F., and proceed to apprehend the mad fans.*
Super C: No; don't fight it! You're going in!
*He throws one fan into the paddy wagon.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Cripto's voice: *to Zax* Not a problem, Zax. It's a good thing I don't care about football anyway. The only sports I ever liked were bowling and, if you consider it a sport, billiards games such as 8-ball.
Cody's voice: *to Juno* No; I ain't goin' down there. I'm lettin' them make idiots of themselves. Besides, it suddenly got stormy down there.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
Wrangler Wolf: All these analysts saying the Texans and Stroud won't win are wrong. I can let you in a secret.
Ravens Fan 1: I like to know.
Wrangler Wolf: AI relies on known data to provide information to the analysts. The Texans have new young guys so there's not much data about them. Because of that, everybody would mistakenly think the Texans will be stuck in their status quo. That right there proves that AI does have limits. AI would say the Patriots would be in the divisionals. Too bad they didn't even make it to the Wild Card rounds. Thus AI has limits, and that God cannot be replicated through AI, something that was tried in Germany and ultimately failed.
Luitpold the Germanic Lion: (narrating in English) True story, folks. The people who tried this actually answered to me, and I told them to be prepared, for one day they will stand before the Lord and will be forced to confess why they attempted to recreate Him through AI.
Ravens Fan 1: So that's why the Texans are virtually Pandora's box that has been opened, unleashing shockwaves throughout the NFL.
Texans Fan 1: Cowboys fans tend to put way too much faith in their team. We Texans fans put our faith in God first because our quarterback and coach does that, too.
Texans Fan 2: In the end, we cheer for our team and let everything be in the hands of them.
*Washington, D.C.*
Zax: *To Leo and his staff.* So I'm wearing Texans gear with a Collins jersey.
Juno: And mine is a Stroud jersey. We usually don't like the Texans but this season changed everything. Do we look good with Texans fan gear on us?
Zax: This dark blue reminds me of winter fashion for some reason.
Jack: We wear battle red, too, you know. I think you two look great in them!
Jill: You're better off associating yourselves with one of the most humble teams in the NFL this season since many of those Cowboys fans are spoiled and beyond conceited.
Mechayote: Even though I like my Bucs, you guys look great in Texans gear! In fact, you're better off with them just for this season at least.
Shadow Hunter: As much as I like my Bills, you two look better in Texans gear. Everybody that said the Texans are nobodies, especially your quarterback, this season are eating their own words. For a quarterback described as a rookie nobody, I'm impressed since he left Brady in the dust.
Mechayote: The Texans have everything in the universe to be proud of right now, win or lose this season.
Jack: Ryans used to play the Texans and now he's their head coach. Very young man, yet he knows exactly what he's doing making the most seasoned coaches jealous.
Zax: I've never seen the Cowboys this jealous this season before. But if the Texans win, Juno and I will go to Houston to celebrate with them. *To Leo* So what do you think of our Texans gear on us?
Juno: This is going to take a bit of getting used to.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*Because the Baltimore Ravens have a marching band of their own, the band plays the national anthem to begin. However, the NFL announces that due to the influence of the Drumbums, all teams will have full marching bands beginning next season, most of which will be filled with Drumbums. If the team didn't have a band but did have a drumline (i.e. the Detroit Lions), then it will expand to a full band. In the case of Detroit, it will be the original drumline plus the full band, and it is expected to have a mix of lions and humans.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: You look great. I do hope for your sake, however, that this is the last time Dallas ever has people who behave like that. It makes the Philadelphia riots pale in comparison. *His communicator beeps.* Okay; that's just confirming the rainstorm Thunder Fox and the others all started is now under control. If your city doesn't behave itself, they're going to make it rain, evidently.
*Dallas, TX, USA*
*The storm stops, and by now, all the rabid fans have either been arrested or have gone home to discover their families are disowning them.*
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*The score is 0-3.*
Ravens Fan 3: Not bad there!
Wrangler Wolf: We tough; ain't we?
Texans Fan 3: We came a long way. Win or lose, we are Texas' best team!
Wrangler Wolf: I think 7 is the perfect number for Stroud since that's a lucky number! I like to see our 7 in the Super Bowl because it would perfectly fit with Las Vegas.
Ravens Fan 3: Wrangler Wolf, wouldn't you be in Dallas to assist with the spoiled angry Cowboys fans since Super C is doing your job there?
Wrangler Wolf: I don't live there. Second, based on my abilities, I am not obligated to deal with them. Third, I'm more needed here for security purposes with the Texans and even if I'm not needed, I ain't dealin' with no spoiled brats based on my abilities. I have to deal with that once when Twitter's employees acted up over Musk and once is too much for me! They wanna trash up their own property and be a nuisance to others, I'll let law enforcement handle them instead since I got more pressing matters than that! Commander understands.
Ravens Fan 3: I see.
*Washington D.C.*
Zax: Divorce lawyers are going to be so busy in Dallas since wives are taking their kids with them so they don't have to deal with fathers who put others in danger with their destructive temper tantrums.
Juno: Oooh Baltimore scores with a field goal! But something tells me the Texans are going to unleash chaos.
Marshall: There's probably a lot of people betting money against the Texans. Last time they did that with the Browns, let's just say lots of people lost money. If the Texans win, third time won't be the charm against them.
Lenarth the Naval Lion: (narrating in English) Hello; sorry to interrupt, but while all this was going, a new era was beginning for the nation of Denmark. Frederick X had just undergone the coronation ceremony as the new King of Demark, so naturally we had a celebration for it.
*Copenhagen, Denmark*
*A formal party is held for Frederick X's coronation as King of Denmark.*
Royal Staff 1: *In Danish* Please enjoy these chocolates.
Royal Staff 2: *In Danish* It's got almonds and sea salt caramel.
Alpha: *In Danish after eating a chocolate.* Whoa! The almonds are surprisingly good here! But the sea salt caramel steals the show even though it goes well with the dark chocolate. Lenarth will enjoy this!
Royal Staff 2: *In Danish* Lenarth, please take a chocolate and tell us your thoughts on it.
*Hicksburg, TX, USA*
*Several homes are intricately decorated with Texans memorabilia.*
Civilian 1: Win or lose, the Texans are our team!
Civilian 2: Oh yeah my home looks great doesn't it?
Civilian 3: It's beautiful! I know the Texans will do great! Win or lose, we must continue to have faith.
Civilian 4: It's a tough game...
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*Later, the score is 17-10, with Baltimore winning.*
Civilian 4: *to Wrangler Wolf* One more quarter to go.
*Washington, D.C.*
Leo: We'll see what happens. Meanwhile, I say it is time Detroit wins the Super Bowl, but that's just me.
*Denmark*
Lenarth: *to Danish* Thank you, and let us look forward to this new era with Frederick X on the throne. *He eats the chocolate.* One of the best I've ever had. I love what they've done here with the sea salt caramel.
*Hicksburg, TX, USA*
*Even Cody's new ranch has the memorabilia.*
Cody: Dallas may be the Cowboys, but I ain't gonna root for them no more! Not if them fans keep behavin' like that.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*The Ravens score another touchdown.*
Civilian 1: Yeah; we got this!
Civilian 2: Nice one!
Civilian 3: I still would not underestimate those Texans. If they lose, they will return with a vengeance next year.
*Washington D.C.*
Zax: This season has been the most unpredictable so far!
Marshall: My 49ers might make it.
Jack: Win or lose, the Texans have been impressive with their coach and quarterback so far despite being rookies.
*Houston, TX, USA*
*Mayor Whitmire helps the city plan ahead for potential flooding before the upcoming victory parade for the Houston Texans for having made to the divisionals first time in history at least.*
Whitmire: The storm is coming. We must plan for the worst! As for the Texans, they will be treated as champions. We've never made it this far before, and we shall celebrate every victorious moments they've achieved so far after the Pro Bowl. I will also seek rapid upgrades to our emergency services and make sure every police and firefighter are paid fairly for their services.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*In the end, the Ravens win.*
Civilian 4: *to Wrangler Wolf* I hope they still did you proud, but it wasn't to be.
*Hicksburg, TX, USA*
*Because Cody finally got a TV after years of never having one, he was able to watch the game with the rest of his posse, the Fab 5.*
Bryce: Didn't work out, but you can't win them all.
Benjamin: How does it feel to be caught up with the modern times, though?
Cody: There was a reason I lived off the grid, but it ain't because I wasn't bein' stupid. But it just wasn't worth it anymore. (Nickelback) Nathan still does; I think he was more stubborn about it than I was. He wants nothing to do with technology whatsoever, unless he had no choice, I suppose.
Nickelback Nathan: (narrating) Cody doesn't tell no lies, but I still ain't got no TV. "Ain't never gonna buy no TV," I once said, "and y'all can't stop me! I ain't puttin' no garbage in my head! Too much garbage on the TV! I read books! Y'all had better start readin' them books and improvin' minds if y'all knows what's good for ya!"
Super C: (narating) That's the closest Nathan ever got to a fine for a demerit, but in the end, I didn't give him one. It's pretty well established that because he can still live off the grid and has the means to do it, he's doing what's right for him. He just need to watch how he says it.
Cody, by contrast, got to where he could not live off the grid anymore because the weather was making it impossible for him, so he sold his ranch to somebody who could do just that, and he found a smaller ranch to be able to continue doing what he does best, except he now has electricity and other things he didn't have before, including the TV. In fact, a bunch of G-52s volunteered to help him buy and move that stuff into his new place.
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: Well, this just in, Baltimore wins it 34 to 24. That was a lot more points than I thought; it was 17 to 10 at the end of the third quarter. Thanks to the Drumbums, however, it says here every NFL team is working on having its own marching band, or expanding upon the drumline it has into a full band. The Detroit Lions, for example, keep their original Drumline, but then you add all the band members to it. However, the Super Bowl will still have people such as Usher performing.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
Wrangler Wolf: They did. We wanted a good team and we got everything in the world for that. Remember, Stroud's a rookie so he's proven a lot to us. The Texans truly sent shockwaves throughout the NFL. We may not be in the Super Bowl, but we showed the world what we got.
Texans Fan 1: That's a good game! Good luck in the conference!
Texans Fan 2: Never forget that Stroud prayed with your players before the game.
Texans Fan 3: He's not only a true Christian, but also a role model for everybody, not just in Houston.
Texans Fan 4: He's got class!
Wrangler Wolf: Stroud did us proud!
Ravens Fan 5: Good game everybody!
Ravens Fan 6: Stroud's got my respect, even though I'll be cheering for the Ravens!
Texans Fan 5: Ryans is an excellent coach, but his offense coordinator might succeed him since every season, players and coaches change since that's how it's done in the NFL.
*Later, Wrangler Wolf and his fellow Texans return home peacefully. In Pearland, new Texans fans decorate their homes with Texans memorabilia as the others move on with their lives. Sane fans of other teams also move on with their lives. However, sane Cowboys fans confront the rabid Cowboys fans over their behavior and gloating against the Texans.*
*Pearland, TX, USA*
Sane Cowboys Fan 1: Hey you! Yeah you!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 1: What do ya want?
Sane Cowboys Fan 1: Your loud gloating is keeping me up all night! Its this behavior that's causing other Cowboys fans to become Texans fans here!
Sane Cowboys Fan 2: Southeast Texas is Texans territory and because of people like you, you're the reason why so many Cowboys fans are switching teams!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 2: Haha! The Texans lost! The Texans lost! We got five Super Bowl rings!
Sane Cowboys Fan 3: Shut up! The Texans didn't even exist when we got those Super Bowl rings!
Sane Cowboys Fan 4: That is so last century! We're not the same Cowboys as before!
Sane Cowboys Fan 5: I'd rather listen to the Texans popping fireworks in the skies here when they win than your disgusting gloating!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 3: Haha see? Texans will never make it to the Super Bowl!
Civilian 1: There's more to football than the Super Bowl! It's about character and class, which CJ Stroud has! He prays with his opponents before the game begins! And after the game, win or lose, he shakes hands and hugs his opponents! It's called good sportsmanship, which the NFL actually promotes! Then again, it's the standard in sports!
Civilian 2: Oh my goodness can you losers just shut up already?!
Civilian 3: Move on! It's just a game in the end! Every team has an equal chance of losing and winning! The Texans prove that the past do not matter in sports!
Civilian 4: This disgusting behavior of yours is killing the Cowboys fanbase! Obsessing on the past Super Bowl games, talking about how you're America's Team because you're on the news a lot, and bragging about how much money your players get paid. So what? Your team needs a rebuild, which the Texans did. In the end, every team has new members to replace their old ones through free agency.
Civilian 5: You are an embarrassment to not only the Dallas Cowboys, but also the entire NFL community!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 4: WE ARE AMERICA'S TEAM!
Wrangler Wolf: *Is struggling to sleep on his bed.* Gosh darn rabid Cowboys fans... Good thing Juno and Zax are in Washington D.C. otherwise they'd put up with this nonsense in their own hometown...
Rabid Cowboys Fan 5: *Has gone insane and hurls a Dak Prescott bobblehead out of his window hitting Wrangler Wolf's home.* And goodbye Prescott! You worthless sack of dirt!
Wrangler Wolf: *He hears a thunk and opens a window from his home.* Alright! Who's throwing stuff?!
*Everybody goes silent for a minute.*
Civilian 6: They done ticked off Wrangler Wolf! *To the rabid Cowboys fans.* You done screwed up now! Better start praying for mercy!
Civilian 7: Everybody get inside!
*Everybody runs back into their homes as Wrangler Wolf closes his window then gets up to get dressed before he sees tossed Cowboys memorabilia everywhere on the ground outside.*
Wrangler Wolf: Wow... Seriously y'all?! Are you that spoiled and ungrateful? Ugh... I'm not cleaning your mess up! The judge's gonna make you perform community service to keep our streets clean for our Texans victory parade after the Pro Bowl! I'm going back home! *He returns back home inside and contacts Super C.* Commander, I ain't dealin' with spoiled Cowboys fans because my abilities and powers are more fit for serious cases than childish cases like this. I also ain't gonna condemn and yell at them directly since the C.I.D.F. are working with local law enforcement to apprehend these brats to jail them before they're sentenced to community service. On top of that, I have to listen to their braying and gloating about the Texans' loss all night that I couldn't sleep! I can only imagine how awful Dallas is right now sadly...
Police 1: *Sighs* Cowboys memorabilia being thrown everywhere onto the streets...
Police 2: Disturbance of peace and littering. How lovely.
*Washington D.C.*
*Juno and Zax are back to regular clothing after putting their Texans outfits away.*
Zax: My city is so disgusting with ungrateful Cowboys fans gloating against the Texans' loss!
Juno: It's that behavior that's killing the Cowboys fanbase! At this rate, the only sane Cowboys left for the most part would be in Dallas and surrounding areas.
Zax: And at least half of Texas will be Texans fans now because of this grossness! We'll still be Cowboys fans, but I wished this behavior stops!
Zachary: Cue the divorces and being fired from jobs over videos exposing these ungrateful idiots for their behavior!
Zax: CJ Stroud is a role model to America, not just Houston, not just Texas.
Mechayote: Houston has so much to be proud of, even though they lost to the Ravens. The Texans won the hearts of many because of character and class, and that matters more than Super Bowl wins.
Zax: Exactly! The rabid Cowboys fans keep obsessing over the old Super Bowl wins from the last century! At that time, the Houston Texans did not exist! The world was different back then too. The Cowboys today are nothing like the past and the refusal to acknowledge this is our team's biggest weakness!
Juno: Strong teams acknowledge their weaknesses, just like how heroes do. CJ Stroud is a man who faced incredible amounts if challenges in his life.
Marshall: His father was arrested on drug dealing charges, so he had to be raised alone by his mother in California. So he had a tough childhood. Yet he went on to Ohio State University to be their quarterback and right after that, he's the Texans' quarterback today. To see that the Texans made it this far thanks to him is beyond impressive. Stroud is an example of what one's willpower can accomplish in America, which is the example of the American Dream.
Jack: I think calling this a miracle for Houston is an understatement. I prayed for a good team, we got an incredible team. We don't deserve this, but God went out His way to find these men for our team. Levon is Armenia's ambassador to America, and I want to tell him how beyond thankful I am that we were able to witness this. Being from Houston, it's a lifechanging event.
Zachary: Call him and tell him how you feel then.
Jack: *He uses his smartphone to call Levon.* Levon, I really do not know how to thank God. I prayed to Him to give the Texans good men to form a good team, instead, He went out His way to give us an incredible team with in my views, the most amazing quarterback the NFL has ever seen. Our quarterback is a rookie, yet he shattered all expectations, brought Houston together, and is instantly a role model to the Americans. Even though we didn't win against the Ravens, our team won so many hearts all over Texas, not just the southeast area. Did you see the images of Hicksburg recently? They're experiencing a fast rise of Texans fans. We do not deserve this incredibly generous miracle, though to call it such would be an understatement. What would you say about this?
*Pearland, TX, USA*
*All the rabid fans lose their jobs as a result of this behavior.*
Super C's voice: I don't blame you; what they did is on them. You don't have a broken window, do you? Two minutes ago, another civilian decided to send me pictures of his house, and he has a broken window.
*Dallas, TX, USA*
*As promised, there are still enough Drumbums to form a full marching band for the Dallas Cowboys. However, they refuse to perform as long as the behavior like this continues.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Levon's voice: There's a reason God works in mysterious ways, and this is one such example. The best way I know to thank Him is to first just say "thank you," and second, use this to help minister the Gospel message to those people if they are not saved.
*Pearland, TX, USA*
Wrangler Wolf: Nope. My windows, like other windows today, uses reinforced glass. But it's still a mess here with discarded Cowboys memorabilia all over our streets.
*Houston, TX, USA*
*There's a rise of Drumbums for the Texans marching band as civilians cheer for them.*
Civilian 1: This is beautiful!
Civilian 2: After the Pro Bowl, our team shall be greeted by this!
Civilian 3: It's glorious!
*Washington D.C.*
Jack: Alright. However, can you please pray for Dallas? Cowboys fans there are being gross with their gloating against the Texans and being bitter over their loss to the Packers. Juno and Zax are from Dallas, who are also Cowboys fans, but are disgusted with their immaturity.
Zax: I've never seen my fellow fans stoop so low before! Punching other fans and booing loudly in unison in a stadium is disgusting!
Juno: The Texans may have their rare moments, but they don't break their TVs and hurl memorabilia onto the streets while spewing profanity loudly in public. I don't hear them boo when they were losing to the Ravens.
*Pearland, TX, USA*
Super C's voice: Why am I not surprised?
*The rabid fans are given 2,000 hours of community service each (or some other absurd amount); the wolf can see this when the fans start picking up their own trash.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: I will pray for Dallas. *to Juno and Zax* I feel bad for you two also. This isn't like your hometown at all.
Tom the Patriotic Tiger: I was tempted to think it was turning into one of those Turkish or Argentine soccer riots before the CNG killed all those people.
*Leo leads everybody in prayers for the city.*
Leo: (narrating) You pray for them, would you, please? I had expected better of a city like Dallas, but it does prove that no matter where you live in the world, there's always going to be somebody who take sports way too seriously, or even treats it like a religion. It also proves why the C.I.D.F. are honest about the effects of CNG taking tens of thousands of years to wear off, showing how powerful it was before it ceased to exist in 2022. Why? Every time sports fans behave like this, they come to discover they are losing their jobs and their families; they get written out of the wills and disowned, and their employers make the references so bad, not even fast food or places like Walmart will hire them.
After praying for the city of Dallas, I had a group chat on the G-52 app (using my desktop computer in the Oval Office) with the real-life animals that are sports mascots, but with all the leagues, not just the NFL. I told them I was praying for them and their hometowns, and told them to keep up the good fight. They agreed with me, though, that all the fans did was on them, and that only they can control them. "Believe me, if I could control them, I would," Swoop said. "It's not worth it sometimes, though."
We'll pause here and pick it up next time.
THE END
-----------------------------------------
How 2024 Got Started
Ryo the Samurai Lion: (narrating in English) Hello. My name is Ryo Mizushima. You know me as Ryo the Samurai Lion, the Japanese counterpart to Leo the Patriotic Lion. One question all us lions are frequently asked is an understandable question to ask: "Are all parallels of Leo destined to become heads of state?" Well, no; I don't think so. Some of them, such as Leng the Bokator Lion, don't need to do that because their deadly martial arts are enough to keep the world in line. Others don't need to do it because they are the minor counterparts to the major parallel. What do I mean by that? Well, Leo is the major parallel because the rest of us from the past didn't start appearing in the present time until he was an established hero, and thus, he's the one everybody thinks of when they think of the United States today. The minor parallels, therefore, are the other parallels from the same country, such as Clyde the Calvary Lion, his counterpart from the Old West.
Leo the Patriotic Lion: (narrating) Not all major parallels have a minor parallel, though; in fact, the majority of us don't. But since I am President, there's no need for the others such as Clyde to get involved in politics if they don't want to; they've been represented.
As for those of us who are becoming heads of state, we feel that it's not a question of if it is going to happen, but when it is going to happen.
Ryo: (narrating in English) And now, it was my turn. It's so frustrating, though. The humans don't trust their own race anymore. It's not fair to us members of the animal kingdom because we end up in occupations we never thought we would have. What about the rest of us who don't want to be these things? However, the general rule is to do everything without complaining or arguing, and so we do that.
Scroll down below to see why I'm now the Prime Minister of Japan.
*Later, it's the new year as the world enters 2024. Neon Blade joins Ryo in investigating a couple of low-profile but serious cases in Tokyo Prefecture.*
Neon Blade: *He is in a cafe alone as he drinks some hot chocolate and speaks in Japanese on his communicator to Ryo.* I hope you had a wonderful new year. Sadly, 2023 ended with a few scandals in Japan. The first case we will investigate involves a prominent animation company that is being investigated for breaking labor laws. We will go there but I hope you are ready for some disturbing revelations about it. Second case involves the Kishida Administration and his political party over some slush fund scandals involving his previous ministers. Seems like everybody across Japan have lost trust in our central government but we will deal with Kishida later. But for now, lets visit the animation company in question. Remember, keep your cool but let me speak first to the suspects. You will be allowed to speak afterwards. Are you ready for a busy day today?
Ryo: *in Japanese* I am ready. I just wish these things didn't happen. Every country has their own scandals, and it does not surprise me that such actions have made our people lose faith in the government. It is so sad; the humans do not trust themselves anymore. But yes. Let's get the scenario under control.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Let's get going.
*Neon Blade and Ryo leave the café and later visit an animation company that has police and C.I.D.F. agents in front of it.*
Police 1: *In Japanese* Right this way, sir!
*The police leads Neon Blade and Ryo to a manager, where they take a seat at a table.*
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* There's a lot of police and C.I.D.F. agents here. This usually does not happen often in Japan, especially for an animation company. What happened?
Manager: *In Japanese* Well, a lot of my workers were calling out sick, and I had to take over their work. It's stressful handling that work and working on our company's social media. It's just been stressful.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* I see.
Manager: *In Japanese* You know how people work in the animation industry.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Right. And you mentioned social media. I want to show you something. *He pulls out a folder and opens it on the table.* Does any of this look familiar to you?
Manager: *In Japanese as he looks over the folder and its contents.* A little. What does this have to do with anything going on now?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* These are social media posts from your workers. Does any of this sound like something a person of sound mind would say online?
Manager: *In Japanese* Well, stress is part of work, you know. You already know how things work in Japan.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* I do, actually, and what you are doing violates Japanese labor law. The manager is the leader of his team and is responsible for the wellbeing of his workers. Your workers have been complaining about the work environment affecting their health. Let me read some stuff out to you from them.
"If I don't get a raise or new job, I may consider ending my life as my legacy will only be a name in some anime's credits scene."
"I hate working 50 hours a week! The trade job workers here live a better life than I do! My existence is a mistake!"
"My company gives me no love ,and I wished to marry a man so I will never have to work for someone again. I rather spend my life with a man and our children for free than to be a slave for scraps of yen."
"City life for an animation company is a mistake. I want to move to a town and start my own business and family. If I can't do that, what's the point of living."
"I hope our viewers from around the world sees my message before I leave this world soon, because we slave for your entertainment."
"It's just anime! Our fans are begging us to delay it for our mental health! Is our boss going to listen?"
"It sucks that pornographic animators make less than we do! I want to wither away in Aokigahara Forest with a message of my fate hung over my chest!"
"The world's work cultures have changed! Why can't Japanese work culture change for our health?!"
"They won't even let me work form home, so I have to come in with a cold over this! Did they forget about COVID-19 already?!"
"Show biz is for the birds if this is what it's coming to. I want my old life back."
Now. Do you see how concerning this is?
Manager: *In Japanese* Then why are there so many cops and C.I.D.F. agents here?!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* When several people at a workplace report being ill at once like this, it is considered a public health issue. Public health issues require investigation and this is one of them. We don't know if germs are being spread here or not, but when you let people come in with colds like that, especially after dealing with COVID-19, this is extremely concerning.
Manager: *In Japanese* As for you two?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Please do not argue. G-52s investigate public health issues in their countries, too. Your workers reported being sick, and you threatened to fire them over this, despite evidence of them providing you their doctors' notes.
Manager: *In Japanese* Fire them?! Are you insane?! I told them I would find ways to make them motivated even if it involves shaming them in front of others by having them sit in the corners! You also know that in Japanese work culture, our office workers work until they fall asleep at work and that's a sign of a productive worker who contributes to society well!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Work culture changes to prevent these things. We also have evidence that government officials encouraged you to allow your workers to work from home, especially during winter time. You ignored their suggestions. You let workers work themselves until they're ill, putting other people at risk in public-
Manager: *In Japanese* Ryo has no problem with our work culture, because we always contribute well to our society and the world!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Do not argue! As a manager, you also have the responsibility to look over the well-being of your workers, as per Japanese labor law.
Manager: *In Japanese* But our viewers-
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Your viewers are more concerned about the health of your workers than the anime shows your company produce. And why are you arguing in front of Ryo?
Manager: *In Japanese* Is he allowed to have an opinion on this case like you are? Does he know anything about the animation industry in Japan?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* One of the politicians in our National Diet is part of that industry and seeks to improve working conditions in this. *To Ryo in Japanese* Did you want to say anything to this manager before the authorities take care of him?
Ryo: *in Japanese* What do you mean, "Am I allowed to have an opinion?" Of course I am. You're right to say that I know almost nothing about that stuff, but we'd be saying the same thing to you if you were manager of a supermarket. If your workers call in sick, don't lay them off! Let them heal; they'll come back! If you're that concerned about productivity and making money, you got your head screwed on backwards. And as my colleague here has said, the health is more important; the viewing public is willing to settle for reruns or watching old episodes on DVD.
Manager: *In Japanese* Head screwed on backwards? You come from the Edo Period! The samurai knows nothing of the small details of this modern world like here!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* You're solely mistaken.
*The police handcuff the manager.*
Manager: *In Japanese* What is going on?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* The samurai is the warrior who defends his people with the greatest honor so they can continue to enjoy their lives in peace. He puts his life on the line first and foremost before the others. Ryo defends our great nation so our people can continue to live their lives. The samurai does not choose to defend his nation to let his people suffer at home.
Police 2: *In Japanese* Okay; let's go.
*The manager complies as the police takes him to the police cab to book him in jail for violating labor laws.*
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* This is going to be a long day. Now, we meet our Prime Minister.
Ryo: *in Japanese* Understood. I have a sad feeling I know what's coming.
*Neon Blade and Ryo later visits the National Diet to visit Kishida.*
Kishida: *In Japanese* I know why you're here. You knew what happened, didn't you?
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Had a rough ending for last year, didn't you?
Kishida: *In Japanese* It was horrible! Our people lost trust in my administration and there's people singing and protesting against me! They were furious!
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Bad day, I see. So what happened?
Kishida: *In Japanese* Some of our ministers got exposed in a slush fund scandal, and people say that we do not do a good job vetting our ministers. I thought every person I appointed was vetted, but I was wrong! This isn't the Japan I wanted. Everything was going well... But it seems people are mad. My political party lost trust, and many of my colleagues resigned, opening the doors to radical people, or in some other cases, those Forsythian animals. There's people who demand radical changes in modern work life, people with ultranationalist ideology mixed with national self-sufficient policies, and people who believe in radical economic changes where men have major influence over the economy and that Japanese women should be rewarded for faithful motherhood. I did everything I could but many want me out. And some claim that I plan to hike taxes later as others call for radical changes of our tax policies to be decentralized as much as possible.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Wow... That is a lot. You do what you have to do to fix your party and reputation. But I don't know what advice I can give.
Kishida: *In Japanese* No need for you to give me any advice, because I already found a solution for Japan's woes. That solution is with you. He is right here. I will resign as Prime Minister and let Ryo take my place as my successor. *To Ryo* I have failed to maintain public confidence. Our people call upon you to lead us to a better future. I'm sure you heard about the slush fund scandals of my ministers not being vetted properly before they took their jobs. Did you want to say something to me before I leave? Seeing that you're a samurai, the least I can ask for is mercy on my life since you have no tolerance for dishonesty.
*Civilians are protesting outside.*
Civilian 1: *In Japanese* Maximize working from home! Our current corporate culture is outdated and unsustainable!
Civilian 2: *In Japanese* Decentralize our taxes and increase government transparency and vetting policies! My yen should fuel our nation's growth not fill the pockets of liars!
Civilian 3: *In Japanese* Support our culture and arts more! Modern life must change with the world to increase our flexibility in life more!
Civilian 4: *In Japanese* Simply telling corporations to increase our pay isn't helping! Encourage our corporations to maximize work from home technologies so we can manage our lives more easily and still maintain maximum productivity!
Civilian 5: *In Japanese* Come on, Japan! Let us be more open to new innovative ideas that actually improves our nation more! We used to be pioneers in software engineering at least and now the Americans beat us in it!
Civilian 6: *In Japanese* Want small businesses to grow? Support their married owners in having as many children as possible! Use that tax money for that more!
Civilian 7: *In Japanese* Make local holidays and festivals official local holidays as well!
Civilian 8: *In Japanese* And put Ryo in office!
Ryo: *in Japanese* I had a feeling this was going to happen; all my counterparts are gaining office, so it wasn't a question of if, but when, it was going to happen. The humans don't trust their own race anymore. But there was absolutely no reason for that slush fund scandal to happen; you people know better than that. Or you should, but didn't. You're right to say I have no tolerance for dishonesty. But I also have no tolerance for people that act as if it is illegal to use common sense. I do not wish to know whether or not you actually would have hiked the taxes or not, but there's no reason our yen should be filling the pockets of those who deceive us. Our royal family is very disappointed with your administration, even if you yourself had nothing to do with some of these things.
The people want you out and me in; now it is time to grant that wish. Goodbye.
*Kishida resigns. Ryo's presence then silences the crowd of protestors as other random Forsythians replace the other human ministers that were involved in the scandal.*
Ryo: *in Japanese through a megaphone* If your wish was for the corrupt humans to get kicked out and replaced with us members of the animal kingdom, it has just been granted. I did not want the job as Prime Minister, but now I have it.
*Everybody cheers as a group of teens do the following shout in unison for the cameras from their friends' phones. Little do they know, Super Shogun, a Japanese G-52 of Forsythian origin, is behind them to go with the flow.*
Group of Teens and Super Shogun: SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!
Super Shogun: *In Japanese* That was good!
Teen 1: *In Japanese* Oh! I didn't know you were here!
Teen 2: *In Japanese* Hello again, as always!
Super Shogun: *In Japanese* Yes, and thanks! Let me go with Ryo and see what needs to be done.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* I guess I'll be Japan's ambassador to America, then.
Politician 1: *In Japanese* I was going to say that. Then we'll have Yamazaki be our ambassador to Canada.
Politician 2: *In Japanese* This is going to be a busy day, but things will be fine. Our tax system is a mess, so let's simplify and decentralize it.
Politician 3: *In Japanese* I like the idea of maximizing work-from-home corporate jobs. Helps to save up resources without sacrificing productivity.
Politician 4: *In Japanese* That and if you look at the work culture of other countries, the managers are also team players. The kohei-sensei corporate system is obsolete and we must embrace this change so our people can be more happy and productive.
Yamazaki: *In Japanese* Western countries are usually the ones that have the manager-team player system.
Politician 5: *In Japanese* In Sweden, the manager is only the representing leader of the group and are typically paid on the same salary level as their members. We must allow our companies to adopt new ideas like this to increase our productivity. There's so much that needs to change in Japan for the better.
Politician 6: *In Japanese* South America has enormous ethnic Japanese communities there and many of them desire to immigrate here to return to their roots. Let's make it easier for them so they can raise their families across Japan in peace.
Neon Blade: *In Japanese* Sounds like you got everything, Ryo. However, be careful with our censorship policies because some policies can be vague and others are already controversial. But asides from that, I think you got this.
Ryo: (narrating in English) Of course I got this under control. Meanwhile, here's what was going on back in the USA.
*Pearland, TX, USA*
*Wrangler Wolf and his fellow Texans fans are watching the Texans vs Browns game and are going nuts because the Texans are scoring so much against the Browns.*
Wrangler Wolf: Did he just do a pick-six?! Did that just happen?!
Civilian 1: What is even happening right now?! They said we had no chance against the Browns! Oh, yeah; CJ, my boy! That's how you do it!
Civilian 2: WHOOOOOOOOO! Nico Collins! Yeah that's how you do it!
Wrangler Wolf: WE JUST CLENCHED THE PLAYOFFS! LET'S GO, TEXANS! LETS GO BABY YEAH! *Oh his communicator.* TEXANS CLENCHED THE PLAYOFFS! I REPEAT! TEXANS CLENCHED THE PLAYOFFS! OOOOH! *He howls.* YEAH; AMERICA!
Civilian 3: That's it! It's over for the Browns! They're gone! We beat them by a blowout!
*Washington D.C.*
Zax: *He is drinking tea and suddenly spews the tea out of his mouth everywhere.* TEXANS DID WHAT?!
Mechayote: No way! Leo! Your Detroit Lions just clenched the playoffs! I think we're going to have a Texans vs Lions Super Bowl!
Frank C.: Do you have any idea how many people are going to be in Vegas if that happens? That will mean enormous marching band parades of both teams that would make the last furry-themed Super Bowl game look tiny in comparison!
Jack: Oh, great; if that happens, that's a crowd crush risk. Hopefully, Vegas has plenty of help to prevent that with all those C.I.D.F. agents coming there when that happens.
*Wrangler Wolf calls Juno on the G-52 app.*
Wrangler Wolf's Voice: We clenched the playoffs, y'all! And I would love to see the Texans take on the Lions in the Super Bowl! That's me against Leo there, y'know, but we ain't mad about it when that happens.
Juno: You're more than invited to join Leo in his suite to watch that game together if that happens. But, man; your quarterback is something else! I thought he was just a mere rookie with too little experience to deal with the others.
Wrangler Wolf's Voice: Stroud is God's answer and blessing to Houston. We prayed for our Texans and He delivered! He may be young with a rough childhood, but he's a fighter! The universe was stacked against him but he ain't afraid to take it on.
Zax: You got an excellent quarterback for once! He left Tom Brady in the dust!
*Wildcat City, KS, USA*
Civilian 1: I wouldn't be surprised if the Texans beat the Chiefs. They put together a great team that understands teamwork well.
Civilian 2: Wait, they clenched the playoffs?! I thought they didn't have a chance! The analysts were wrong!
Civilian 3: They even used A.I. to gather the data against the Texans, and yet, they proved them wrong. These analysts look like they owe the Texans public apologies.
Civilian 4: I've been following Stroud for a bit. That right there, he's a prime example of an NFL role model. Win or lose, he will walk home as Houston's ultimate champion. Everybody now knows him.
Super C: (narrating) The other moral to that story is don't use A.I. for something like that; it's a waste of time, energy, and data. That's my opinion, anyway. But it's true; the Texans won the game in question, and made all the sports analysts eat their words.
*American Embassy, Stockholm, Sweden*
Konrad: *Is watching football on TV.* No! No way! These Texans are so good! But how? None of these guys seem like they're famous for anything. They beat the Browns by a blowout! My respect to the Texans then! They earned it!
Embassy Staff 1: The analysts said they had no chance, but they proved us wrong.
Embassy Staff 2: I thought Stroud having a low S2 score would basically keep the Texans' status quo as being among the worst teams in the NFL, and boy, was I wrong! They got an excellent head coach!
Konrad: The Texans knew what they were doing...
*Cleveland, OH, USA*
*The entire city goes silent as some civilians slowly clap for the Texans.*
Civilian 1: You know what? They deserved that win and our respect!
Civilian 2: For a rookie, that was impressive! I wish them luck to the Super Bowl then!
Civilian 3: Wow; they humiliated us big time! Big respect to them though in proving the analysts wrong!
Civilian 4: The Texans had the whole world against them and beat us in the playoffs like we were nothing!
Civilian 5: Who exactly is CJ Stroud, and why is he so darn good?! I thought he was a nobody!
Civilian 6: I think the sports analysts are more humiliated by the fact that the Texans proved them wrong at their jobs.
Civilian 7: I ain't mad! You deserved that win! My respects bro!
*Japan*
Ryo: *in Japanese* I promise to respect that. The censorship policies, I mean; I'll probably be asking for advice about matters like that, as well as the productivity matter. After all, greed destroys people.
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: It's about time we see Detroit clench. *His communicator beeps.* Oh, and this just in: due to a variety of scandals surrounding the Japanese Prime Minister, he resigned, and now Ryo has the job. So we'll be getting a new ambassador shortly.
*WC, KS, USA*
Super C: The Chiefs have won it a couple times in the last few years. It's someone else's turn now unless fate decides otherwise, but one thing is certain. The dominance we've seen from the coastal teams in being in the Super Bowl to start with seems to have shifted to middle America.
*Washington D.C., USA*
Zax: Now Japan has your parallel in charge, too.
Juno: I wasn't expecting that, but Japan needed some changes.
Marshall: Starting with their idea of corporate work culture, which is outdated! In America, managers are team players.
Zax: I think Japan will improve drastically under Ryo now that the samurai lion is in charge.
Leo: (narrating) They will indeed. We now shift our attention to what was happening in the NFL, and how people reacted to it. Sadly, Philadelphia had to discover that they weren't the only ones with terrible sports fans, but they should learn a lesson from it, for the real-life versions of the major league sports mascots allied with the G-52s (including Swoop, the Eagles mascot) had been campaigning to get their people to behave. Now they could use this to say to the public, "Do you see what you started?"
It wasn't a first, though; what was supposed to be a victory parade for Dallas in 1993 after the Super Bowl win that year resulted in violence in the end. It was one of the first major cases, I've been asked to point out, where CNG ramped up the number of humans it was killing for such behavior, but at the time, nobody knew what was happening. Everybody thought it was just God punishing the earth for turning their back on Him. (In a way, by letting CNG do what it did, He was also punishing the Earth that way. It just wasn't until the 2010's that CNG really got out of control, and when it ceased to exist in 2022, it was during the period we are in now, where Christanity's numbers are rising at an alarming rate, and the other religions are losing numbers just as alarmingly.)
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*The Texans vs Ravens game begins.*
Wrangler Wolf: Y'know, it's a good thing that Houston and nearby towns got more Texans fans, but man; them Cowboys fans are nuts! This year, they went cuckoo to the point that Philly and Patriots fans got nothin' on them!
Ravens Fan 1: I saw some videos of those Coowboys fans. One of them punched a female Packers fan. Likems come on! Guys shouldn't hit women like that literally!
Ravens Fan 2: Talk about a record low!
Wrangler Wolf: Y'all want record low? Back in Pearland, hardcore Cowboys fans were dropping more f-bombs and d-bombs than Louis Loserberg for a whole week compared this his entire life! In Dallas, fools be tossin' TVs and Cowboys merch out the window onto the streets! And to top it off, they get extremely jealous about our team making it here!
Cripto: (narrating) Towards the end of his life, Louis was so angry, he was yelling almost 200 swear words a minute. That's the context Wrangler Wolf was referring to here. However, these fans overtook that record big time. It led Wildcat City to still show less overall interest in the NFL, and instead turn its attention to the NBA and NHL. The NBA in particular is suffering; its television viewing ratings are at an all-time low. Yet they play on, thanks to the motivational factor that basketball was Caticon's national sport.
Ravens Fan 2: Dude; that's horrible!
Texans Fan 1: We're just thankful to be here. All we prayed for was to have a good quarterback and we are here, which we didn't expect.
Texans Fan 2: Them Cowboys fans were so jealous of us, they have been betting against us to lose. When they make it to the playoffs, we wish them luck, but since they want to be jerks, then we'll treat them as such.
Texans Fan 3: I was hoping we'd get an all-Texas Super Bowl, but an all-furry themed Super Bowl is more likely instead, which is Texans vs Lions.
Ravens Fan 3: Las Vegas would be jam-packed to the brim if that happens!
Raven Fan 4: I have to admit that I underestimated your team. This isn't the Texans from the first game. This is a whole different beast!
*Dallas, TX, USA*
*Civilians put up with mad Cowboys fans screaming and crying over their team losing to the Green Bay Packers as some watch the Texans vs Ravens game in jealousy.*
Mad Cowboys Fan 1: *Cries as he watches his TV.* OH; WHYYYYY! WHY DO THESE ROOKIES DO BETTER THAN MY TEAM?! WHYYYYYY?!
Mad Cowboys Fan 2: No fair! Dak Prescott, my butt!
Civilian 1: Hey; shut up! It's just a game!
Civilian 2: I've heard you day in and day out about your Cowboys and how the Texans are better than our team! Enough already! The Texans actually did something, unlike our team!
Mad Cowboys Fan 3: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! We've had Prescott for years, and the Texans only have a rookie fresh from college for less than a year; yet they made it to divisionals! It's not fair! Even their head coach is new and already we look like garbage because of those Texans! Screw the Packers! I will not eat cheese until next season!
Civilian 3: Shut up and hide your freaking face!
Civilian 4: Go burn another Prescott jersey, you loser!
Civilian 5: Prescott this! Prescott that! Cowboys this! Cowboys that! Packers this! Packers that! Texans this! Texans that! Just shut up!
Mad Cowboys Fan 4: I hope the Texans lose! This is nonsense!
Mad Cowboys Fan 5: *Throws eggs and cheese at some effigies of various Dallas Cowboys football players.* Screw you Prescott and Bryant! You play like garbage! *He accidentally eggs a neighbor's house during his fit of rage.*
Civilian 6: Dude! You just egged my house! Get over it and move on!
Mad Cowboys Fan 5: Texans humiliated us! We got humiliated by rookies and amateurs!
Civilian 6: So what? They worked and played hard for this and are worthy of deserving respect!
*Houston, TX, USA*
*Several more civilians become full-time Texans fans.*
Civilian 1: See? You got more reasons to be a Texans fan!
Civilian 2: Our city is healing! More of us are displaying Texans flags and banners, too!
Civilian 3: *praying* Dear Lord, please guide our team to victory, and please forgive the people of Dallas.
Civilian 4: Too bad we still have too many angry Cowboys fans here. Just ignore them and let the problem take care of themselves.
Mad Cowboys Fan 1: Stupid team! *He throws his Cowboys merchandise in a box.* You're only good for campfire!
Mad Cowboys Fan 2: Jerry Jones you disappoint me!
Civilian 5: *He uses his phone to safely record the mad Cowboys fans.* Just let these guys vent. Let them destroy their stuff. Let them destroy their TVs too. That's their stuff.
Civilian 6: At this rate, these angry Cowboys fans are going to make Cody become a Texans fan instead, since, just like Wrangler Wolf, he won't put up with this childish nonsense!
*Washington, D.C., USA*
*Juno and Zax wear Texans fan clothing to show off in.*
Zax: Jack, this is supposed to look good on us?
Jack: Yup! I tossed out my Seahawks gear because the Texans know what they're doing! See? They don't look bad on you.
Juno: Zax and I are glad we're not in Dallas after seeing videos of Cowboys fans going crazy that they make Philly Eagles fans look tame in comparison.
Zax: It's just a game and the Texans deserved their victory! If the Cowboys could get their heads together, they would've been in the divisionals, but no! They're too egotistical to think like that! Stroud is a true role model of how NFL players should strive to be! He is smarter than Prescott and he proved it!
Juno: I don't see Texans fans acting like this when they lose. But, oh, goodness; the jealous attitudes Cowboys fans displayed to the Texans! That's super childish to the max! No wonder why the internet is blowing up with videos of Cowboys fans wrecking their own stuff after losing to the Packers! As for Dallas, nobody can sleep since they have to hear this day in and day out!
Zax: Complete with nonstop profanity that would make Louis Loserberg blush. Wait, I should tell Cripto to avoid Dallas until next season since if my fellow Cowboys fans want to curse and destroy stuff like that as well as to vent their jealous rage at the Texans, then Cripto should avoid that city for a bit so they can vent.
Juno: Cops must be busy there and anger management classes must be full and busy there too.
Marshall: Zax, you should tell Cripto to avoid your city until next season. I've seen the videos of their angry fans and it's bad. Mad Eagles fans got nothing on this! This is entering Lennart the Viking Lion's raid territory mixed with temper tantrums.
Zax: Sure. *He uses his smartphone to call Cripto on his communicator.* Cripto, whatever you do, do not visit Dallas until next NFL season. There's too many crazy Cowboys fans throwing and destroying stuff and are shouting obscenities at the Texans for clenching the playoffs and their team failing to do that.
Juno: I have to tell Cody the same! *He uses his smartphone to call Cody on his communicator.* Cody, you should avoid Dallas until next football season. The Cowboys fans there have gone bonkers and I don't want you firing your guns at them. Let the Dallas police and C.I.D.F. there handle this.
Jack: I wouldn't be surprised if this whole thing causes Cody to become a full-time Texans fan. Stroud is amazing as both a person and a quarterback!
*Dallas, TX, USA*
Civilian 5: Somebody get Cody!
Civilian 6: No, don't. He'll shoot at everybody.
Civilian 7: Are you sure about that? Wait; what's that?
Civilian 8: What?
Civilian 7: Nothing; I think I'm going mental.
*The population runs inside to hide from the mad Cowboys fans. Suddenly, a massive storm begins; this indicates Thunder Fox, Weather Wolf, and Thunder Dog are using their weather powers to put an end to the chaos.*
Thunder Dog: I hate to say it, but I've done the same thing to my own people. Except my football is Aussie rules football.
Thunder Fox: I watched that the other night; that's a crazy game. It's all over the world; there's always somebody who takes their sports way too seriously.
*Super C shows with the C.I.D.F., and proceed to apprehend the mad fans.*
Super C: No; don't fight it! You're going in!
*He throws one fan into the paddy wagon.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Cripto's voice: *to Zax* Not a problem, Zax. It's a good thing I don't care about football anyway. The only sports I ever liked were bowling and, if you consider it a sport, billiards games such as 8-ball.
Cody's voice: *to Juno* No; I ain't goin' down there. I'm lettin' them make idiots of themselves. Besides, it suddenly got stormy down there.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
Wrangler Wolf: All these analysts saying the Texans and Stroud won't win are wrong. I can let you in a secret.
Ravens Fan 1: I like to know.
Wrangler Wolf: AI relies on known data to provide information to the analysts. The Texans have new young guys so there's not much data about them. Because of that, everybody would mistakenly think the Texans will be stuck in their status quo. That right there proves that AI does have limits. AI would say the Patriots would be in the divisionals. Too bad they didn't even make it to the Wild Card rounds. Thus AI has limits, and that God cannot be replicated through AI, something that was tried in Germany and ultimately failed.
Luitpold the Germanic Lion: (narrating in English) True story, folks. The people who tried this actually answered to me, and I told them to be prepared, for one day they will stand before the Lord and will be forced to confess why they attempted to recreate Him through AI.
Ravens Fan 1: So that's why the Texans are virtually Pandora's box that has been opened, unleashing shockwaves throughout the NFL.
Texans Fan 1: Cowboys fans tend to put way too much faith in their team. We Texans fans put our faith in God first because our quarterback and coach does that, too.
Texans Fan 2: In the end, we cheer for our team and let everything be in the hands of them.
*Washington, D.C.*
Zax: *To Leo and his staff.* So I'm wearing Texans gear with a Collins jersey.
Juno: And mine is a Stroud jersey. We usually don't like the Texans but this season changed everything. Do we look good with Texans fan gear on us?
Zax: This dark blue reminds me of winter fashion for some reason.
Jack: We wear battle red, too, you know. I think you two look great in them!
Jill: You're better off associating yourselves with one of the most humble teams in the NFL this season since many of those Cowboys fans are spoiled and beyond conceited.
Mechayote: Even though I like my Bucs, you guys look great in Texans gear! In fact, you're better off with them just for this season at least.
Shadow Hunter: As much as I like my Bills, you two look better in Texans gear. Everybody that said the Texans are nobodies, especially your quarterback, this season are eating their own words. For a quarterback described as a rookie nobody, I'm impressed since he left Brady in the dust.
Mechayote: The Texans have everything in the universe to be proud of right now, win or lose this season.
Jack: Ryans used to play the Texans and now he's their head coach. Very young man, yet he knows exactly what he's doing making the most seasoned coaches jealous.
Zax: I've never seen the Cowboys this jealous this season before. But if the Texans win, Juno and I will go to Houston to celebrate with them. *To Leo* So what do you think of our Texans gear on us?
Juno: This is going to take a bit of getting used to.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*Because the Baltimore Ravens have a marching band of their own, the band plays the national anthem to begin. However, the NFL announces that due to the influence of the Drumbums, all teams will have full marching bands beginning next season, most of which will be filled with Drumbums. If the team didn't have a band but did have a drumline (i.e. the Detroit Lions), then it will expand to a full band. In the case of Detroit, it will be the original drumline plus the full band, and it is expected to have a mix of lions and humans.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: You look great. I do hope for your sake, however, that this is the last time Dallas ever has people who behave like that. It makes the Philadelphia riots pale in comparison. *His communicator beeps.* Okay; that's just confirming the rainstorm Thunder Fox and the others all started is now under control. If your city doesn't behave itself, they're going to make it rain, evidently.
*Dallas, TX, USA*
*The storm stops, and by now, all the rabid fans have either been arrested or have gone home to discover their families are disowning them.*
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*The score is 0-3.*
Ravens Fan 3: Not bad there!
Wrangler Wolf: We tough; ain't we?
Texans Fan 3: We came a long way. Win or lose, we are Texas' best team!
Wrangler Wolf: I think 7 is the perfect number for Stroud since that's a lucky number! I like to see our 7 in the Super Bowl because it would perfectly fit with Las Vegas.
Ravens Fan 3: Wrangler Wolf, wouldn't you be in Dallas to assist with the spoiled angry Cowboys fans since Super C is doing your job there?
Wrangler Wolf: I don't live there. Second, based on my abilities, I am not obligated to deal with them. Third, I'm more needed here for security purposes with the Texans and even if I'm not needed, I ain't dealin' with no spoiled brats based on my abilities. I have to deal with that once when Twitter's employees acted up over Musk and once is too much for me! They wanna trash up their own property and be a nuisance to others, I'll let law enforcement handle them instead since I got more pressing matters than that! Commander understands.
Ravens Fan 3: I see.
*Washington D.C.*
Zax: Divorce lawyers are going to be so busy in Dallas since wives are taking their kids with them so they don't have to deal with fathers who put others in danger with their destructive temper tantrums.
Juno: Oooh Baltimore scores with a field goal! But something tells me the Texans are going to unleash chaos.
Marshall: There's probably a lot of people betting money against the Texans. Last time they did that with the Browns, let's just say lots of people lost money. If the Texans win, third time won't be the charm against them.
Lenarth the Naval Lion: (narrating in English) Hello; sorry to interrupt, but while all this was going, a new era was beginning for the nation of Denmark. Frederick X had just undergone the coronation ceremony as the new King of Demark, so naturally we had a celebration for it.
*Copenhagen, Denmark*
*A formal party is held for Frederick X's coronation as King of Denmark.*
Royal Staff 1: *In Danish* Please enjoy these chocolates.
Royal Staff 2: *In Danish* It's got almonds and sea salt caramel.
Alpha: *In Danish after eating a chocolate.* Whoa! The almonds are surprisingly good here! But the sea salt caramel steals the show even though it goes well with the dark chocolate. Lenarth will enjoy this!
Royal Staff 2: *In Danish* Lenarth, please take a chocolate and tell us your thoughts on it.
*Hicksburg, TX, USA*
*Several homes are intricately decorated with Texans memorabilia.*
Civilian 1: Win or lose, the Texans are our team!
Civilian 2: Oh yeah my home looks great doesn't it?
Civilian 3: It's beautiful! I know the Texans will do great! Win or lose, we must continue to have faith.
Civilian 4: It's a tough game...
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*Later, the score is 17-10, with Baltimore winning.*
Civilian 4: *to Wrangler Wolf* One more quarter to go.
*Washington, D.C.*
Leo: We'll see what happens. Meanwhile, I say it is time Detroit wins the Super Bowl, but that's just me.
*Denmark*
Lenarth: *to Danish* Thank you, and let us look forward to this new era with Frederick X on the throne. *He eats the chocolate.* One of the best I've ever had. I love what they've done here with the sea salt caramel.
*Hicksburg, TX, USA*
*Even Cody's new ranch has the memorabilia.*
Cody: Dallas may be the Cowboys, but I ain't gonna root for them no more! Not if them fans keep behavin' like that.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*The Ravens score another touchdown.*
Civilian 1: Yeah; we got this!
Civilian 2: Nice one!
Civilian 3: I still would not underestimate those Texans. If they lose, they will return with a vengeance next year.
*Washington D.C.*
Zax: This season has been the most unpredictable so far!
Marshall: My 49ers might make it.
Jack: Win or lose, the Texans have been impressive with their coach and quarterback so far despite being rookies.
*Houston, TX, USA*
*Mayor Whitmire helps the city plan ahead for potential flooding before the upcoming victory parade for the Houston Texans for having made to the divisionals first time in history at least.*
Whitmire: The storm is coming. We must plan for the worst! As for the Texans, they will be treated as champions. We've never made it this far before, and we shall celebrate every victorious moments they've achieved so far after the Pro Bowl. I will also seek rapid upgrades to our emergency services and make sure every police and firefighter are paid fairly for their services.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
*In the end, the Ravens win.*
Civilian 4: *to Wrangler Wolf* I hope they still did you proud, but it wasn't to be.
*Hicksburg, TX, USA*
*Because Cody finally got a TV after years of never having one, he was able to watch the game with the rest of his posse, the Fab 5.*
Bryce: Didn't work out, but you can't win them all.
Benjamin: How does it feel to be caught up with the modern times, though?
Cody: There was a reason I lived off the grid, but it ain't because I wasn't bein' stupid. But it just wasn't worth it anymore. (Nickelback) Nathan still does; I think he was more stubborn about it than I was. He wants nothing to do with technology whatsoever, unless he had no choice, I suppose.
Nickelback Nathan: (narrating) Cody doesn't tell no lies, but I still ain't got no TV. "Ain't never gonna buy no TV," I once said, "and y'all can't stop me! I ain't puttin' no garbage in my head! Too much garbage on the TV! I read books! Y'all had better start readin' them books and improvin' minds if y'all knows what's good for ya!"
Super C: (narating) That's the closest Nathan ever got to a fine for a demerit, but in the end, I didn't give him one. It's pretty well established that because he can still live off the grid and has the means to do it, he's doing what's right for him. He just need to watch how he says it.
Cody, by contrast, got to where he could not live off the grid anymore because the weather was making it impossible for him, so he sold his ranch to somebody who could do just that, and he found a smaller ranch to be able to continue doing what he does best, except he now has electricity and other things he didn't have before, including the TV. In fact, a bunch of G-52s volunteered to help him buy and move that stuff into his new place.
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: Well, this just in, Baltimore wins it 34 to 24. That was a lot more points than I thought; it was 17 to 10 at the end of the third quarter. Thanks to the Drumbums, however, it says here every NFL team is working on having its own marching band, or expanding upon the drumline it has into a full band. The Detroit Lions, for example, keep their original Drumline, but then you add all the band members to it. However, the Super Bowl will still have people such as Usher performing.
*Baltimore, MD, USA*
Wrangler Wolf: They did. We wanted a good team and we got everything in the world for that. Remember, Stroud's a rookie so he's proven a lot to us. The Texans truly sent shockwaves throughout the NFL. We may not be in the Super Bowl, but we showed the world what we got.
Texans Fan 1: That's a good game! Good luck in the conference!
Texans Fan 2: Never forget that Stroud prayed with your players before the game.
Texans Fan 3: He's not only a true Christian, but also a role model for everybody, not just in Houston.
Texans Fan 4: He's got class!
Wrangler Wolf: Stroud did us proud!
Ravens Fan 5: Good game everybody!
Ravens Fan 6: Stroud's got my respect, even though I'll be cheering for the Ravens!
Texans Fan 5: Ryans is an excellent coach, but his offense coordinator might succeed him since every season, players and coaches change since that's how it's done in the NFL.
*Later, Wrangler Wolf and his fellow Texans return home peacefully. In Pearland, new Texans fans decorate their homes with Texans memorabilia as the others move on with their lives. Sane fans of other teams also move on with their lives. However, sane Cowboys fans confront the rabid Cowboys fans over their behavior and gloating against the Texans.*
*Pearland, TX, USA*
Sane Cowboys Fan 1: Hey you! Yeah you!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 1: What do ya want?
Sane Cowboys Fan 1: Your loud gloating is keeping me up all night! Its this behavior that's causing other Cowboys fans to become Texans fans here!
Sane Cowboys Fan 2: Southeast Texas is Texans territory and because of people like you, you're the reason why so many Cowboys fans are switching teams!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 2: Haha! The Texans lost! The Texans lost! We got five Super Bowl rings!
Sane Cowboys Fan 3: Shut up! The Texans didn't even exist when we got those Super Bowl rings!
Sane Cowboys Fan 4: That is so last century! We're not the same Cowboys as before!
Sane Cowboys Fan 5: I'd rather listen to the Texans popping fireworks in the skies here when they win than your disgusting gloating!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 3: Haha see? Texans will never make it to the Super Bowl!
Civilian 1: There's more to football than the Super Bowl! It's about character and class, which CJ Stroud has! He prays with his opponents before the game begins! And after the game, win or lose, he shakes hands and hugs his opponents! It's called good sportsmanship, which the NFL actually promotes! Then again, it's the standard in sports!
Civilian 2: Oh my goodness can you losers just shut up already?!
Civilian 3: Move on! It's just a game in the end! Every team has an equal chance of losing and winning! The Texans prove that the past do not matter in sports!
Civilian 4: This disgusting behavior of yours is killing the Cowboys fanbase! Obsessing on the past Super Bowl games, talking about how you're America's Team because you're on the news a lot, and bragging about how much money your players get paid. So what? Your team needs a rebuild, which the Texans did. In the end, every team has new members to replace their old ones through free agency.
Civilian 5: You are an embarrassment to not only the Dallas Cowboys, but also the entire NFL community!
Rabid Cowboys Fan 4: WE ARE AMERICA'S TEAM!
Wrangler Wolf: *Is struggling to sleep on his bed.* Gosh darn rabid Cowboys fans... Good thing Juno and Zax are in Washington D.C. otherwise they'd put up with this nonsense in their own hometown...
Rabid Cowboys Fan 5: *Has gone insane and hurls a Dak Prescott bobblehead out of his window hitting Wrangler Wolf's home.* And goodbye Prescott! You worthless sack of dirt!
Wrangler Wolf: *He hears a thunk and opens a window from his home.* Alright! Who's throwing stuff?!
*Everybody goes silent for a minute.*
Civilian 6: They done ticked off Wrangler Wolf! *To the rabid Cowboys fans.* You done screwed up now! Better start praying for mercy!
Civilian 7: Everybody get inside!
*Everybody runs back into their homes as Wrangler Wolf closes his window then gets up to get dressed before he sees tossed Cowboys memorabilia everywhere on the ground outside.*
Wrangler Wolf: Wow... Seriously y'all?! Are you that spoiled and ungrateful? Ugh... I'm not cleaning your mess up! The judge's gonna make you perform community service to keep our streets clean for our Texans victory parade after the Pro Bowl! I'm going back home! *He returns back home inside and contacts Super C.* Commander, I ain't dealin' with spoiled Cowboys fans because my abilities and powers are more fit for serious cases than childish cases like this. I also ain't gonna condemn and yell at them directly since the C.I.D.F. are working with local law enforcement to apprehend these brats to jail them before they're sentenced to community service. On top of that, I have to listen to their braying and gloating about the Texans' loss all night that I couldn't sleep! I can only imagine how awful Dallas is right now sadly...
Police 1: *Sighs* Cowboys memorabilia being thrown everywhere onto the streets...
Police 2: Disturbance of peace and littering. How lovely.
*Washington D.C.*
*Juno and Zax are back to regular clothing after putting their Texans outfits away.*
Zax: My city is so disgusting with ungrateful Cowboys fans gloating against the Texans' loss!
Juno: It's that behavior that's killing the Cowboys fanbase! At this rate, the only sane Cowboys left for the most part would be in Dallas and surrounding areas.
Zax: And at least half of Texas will be Texans fans now because of this grossness! We'll still be Cowboys fans, but I wished this behavior stops!
Zachary: Cue the divorces and being fired from jobs over videos exposing these ungrateful idiots for their behavior!
Zax: CJ Stroud is a role model to America, not just Houston, not just Texas.
Mechayote: Houston has so much to be proud of, even though they lost to the Ravens. The Texans won the hearts of many because of character and class, and that matters more than Super Bowl wins.
Zax: Exactly! The rabid Cowboys fans keep obsessing over the old Super Bowl wins from the last century! At that time, the Houston Texans did not exist! The world was different back then too. The Cowboys today are nothing like the past and the refusal to acknowledge this is our team's biggest weakness!
Juno: Strong teams acknowledge their weaknesses, just like how heroes do. CJ Stroud is a man who faced incredible amounts if challenges in his life.
Marshall: His father was arrested on drug dealing charges, so he had to be raised alone by his mother in California. So he had a tough childhood. Yet he went on to Ohio State University to be their quarterback and right after that, he's the Texans' quarterback today. To see that the Texans made it this far thanks to him is beyond impressive. Stroud is an example of what one's willpower can accomplish in America, which is the example of the American Dream.
Jack: I think calling this a miracle for Houston is an understatement. I prayed for a good team, we got an incredible team. We don't deserve this, but God went out His way to find these men for our team. Levon is Armenia's ambassador to America, and I want to tell him how beyond thankful I am that we were able to witness this. Being from Houston, it's a lifechanging event.
Zachary: Call him and tell him how you feel then.
Jack: *He uses his smartphone to call Levon.* Levon, I really do not know how to thank God. I prayed to Him to give the Texans good men to form a good team, instead, He went out His way to give us an incredible team with in my views, the most amazing quarterback the NFL has ever seen. Our quarterback is a rookie, yet he shattered all expectations, brought Houston together, and is instantly a role model to the Americans. Even though we didn't win against the Ravens, our team won so many hearts all over Texas, not just the southeast area. Did you see the images of Hicksburg recently? They're experiencing a fast rise of Texans fans. We do not deserve this incredibly generous miracle, though to call it such would be an understatement. What would you say about this?
*Pearland, TX, USA*
*All the rabid fans lose their jobs as a result of this behavior.*
Super C's voice: I don't blame you; what they did is on them. You don't have a broken window, do you? Two minutes ago, another civilian decided to send me pictures of his house, and he has a broken window.
*Dallas, TX, USA*
*As promised, there are still enough Drumbums to form a full marching band for the Dallas Cowboys. However, they refuse to perform as long as the behavior like this continues.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Levon's voice: There's a reason God works in mysterious ways, and this is one such example. The best way I know to thank Him is to first just say "thank you," and second, use this to help minister the Gospel message to those people if they are not saved.
*Pearland, TX, USA*
Wrangler Wolf: Nope. My windows, like other windows today, uses reinforced glass. But it's still a mess here with discarded Cowboys memorabilia all over our streets.
*Houston, TX, USA*
*There's a rise of Drumbums for the Texans marching band as civilians cheer for them.*
Civilian 1: This is beautiful!
Civilian 2: After the Pro Bowl, our team shall be greeted by this!
Civilian 3: It's glorious!
*Washington D.C.*
Jack: Alright. However, can you please pray for Dallas? Cowboys fans there are being gross with their gloating against the Texans and being bitter over their loss to the Packers. Juno and Zax are from Dallas, who are also Cowboys fans, but are disgusted with their immaturity.
Zax: I've never seen my fellow fans stoop so low before! Punching other fans and booing loudly in unison in a stadium is disgusting!
Juno: The Texans may have their rare moments, but they don't break their TVs and hurl memorabilia onto the streets while spewing profanity loudly in public. I don't hear them boo when they were losing to the Ravens.
*Pearland, TX, USA*
Super C's voice: Why am I not surprised?
*The rabid fans are given 2,000 hours of community service each (or some other absurd amount); the wolf can see this when the fans start picking up their own trash.*
*Washington, D.C., USA*
Leo: I will pray for Dallas. *to Juno and Zax* I feel bad for you two also. This isn't like your hometown at all.
Tom the Patriotic Tiger: I was tempted to think it was turning into one of those Turkish or Argentine soccer riots before the CNG killed all those people.
*Leo leads everybody in prayers for the city.*
Leo: (narrating) You pray for them, would you, please? I had expected better of a city like Dallas, but it does prove that no matter where you live in the world, there's always going to be somebody who take sports way too seriously, or even treats it like a religion. It also proves why the C.I.D.F. are honest about the effects of CNG taking tens of thousands of years to wear off, showing how powerful it was before it ceased to exist in 2022. Why? Every time sports fans behave like this, they come to discover they are losing their jobs and their families; they get written out of the wills and disowned, and their employers make the references so bad, not even fast food or places like Walmart will hire them.
After praying for the city of Dallas, I had a group chat on the G-52 app (using my desktop computer in the Oval Office) with the real-life animals that are sports mascots, but with all the leagues, not just the NFL. I told them I was praying for them and their hometowns, and told them to keep up the good fight. They agreed with me, though, that all the fans did was on them, and that only they can control them. "Believe me, if I could control them, I would," Swoop said. "It's not worth it sometimes, though."
We'll pause here and pick it up next time.
THE END
The G-52s begin the new year with what's happening around the NFL, as well as the fact that due to slush fund scandals happening in Japan, Ryo the Samurai Lion now serves as the Prime Minister of that country.
Leo himself, G-52s, C.I.D.F., etc. © me and me alone
Parallels of Leo and select individual G-52s (i.e. Wrangler Wolf) are joint-owned by me and Chuong
UN1042s, etc. © Chuong alone
Swoop © NFL
All other mascots belong to their respective owners.
Leo himself, G-52s, C.I.D.F., etc. © me and me alone
Parallels of Leo and select individual G-52s (i.e. Wrangler Wolf) are joint-owned by me and Chuong
UN1042s, etc. © Chuong alone
Swoop © NFL
All other mascots belong to their respective owners.
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Gender Any
Size 120 x 120px
Chuong: It sounds like the Houston Texans embarrassed the souls out of the Dallas Cowboys and they didn't even see each other this season.
Wrangler Wolf: We did! Stroud proud y'all! Even Hicksburg is embracin' the Texans spirit!
Zax: I was incredibly disgusted how many of my fans reacted against the Packers. And as painful as that may be, the Texans earned that right to embarrass us like they did; especially the fact that they got a rookie QB and a first year head coach. Toro, their mascot, earned every right to poke fun at us and we cannot complain. He basically won all the hearts throughout Texas and has the bragging rights of being Texas' team.
Jack: It was a shocking season seeing the Texans go that far like they did with such young and fresh people. But I'm proud of my team.
Wrangler Wolf: We did! Stroud proud y'all! Even Hicksburg is embracin' the Texans spirit!
Zax: I was incredibly disgusted how many of my fans reacted against the Packers. And as painful as that may be, the Texans earned that right to embarrass us like they did; especially the fact that they got a rookie QB and a first year head coach. Toro, their mascot, earned every right to poke fun at us and we cannot complain. He basically won all the hearts throughout Texas and has the bragging rights of being Texas' team.
Jack: It was a shocking season seeing the Texans go that far like they did with such young and fresh people. But I'm proud of my team.
Cripto: More power to them. I don't remember Toro poking fun at them, though.
Super C: If he has, he has not done it in such a way it would catch my attention. He is an ally to the G-52s just like all the mascots.
Super C: If he has, he has not done it in such a way it would catch my attention. He is an ally to the G-52s just like all the mascots.
Jack: One thing for sure is that Toro is going to use videos of bad fan behavior to teach his viewers proper fan etiquette and how not to behave in sports.
Zax: Of course gotta censor out the typical profanity. My home city of Dallas is so much better than this because we are home to more than just our Cowboys.
Diamond Knight: At least profanity is your worst problems from bad fan behavior. Back in Argentina before Milei, it's straight up mass violence.
Zax: Of course gotta censor out the typical profanity. My home city of Dallas is so much better than this because we are home to more than just our Cowboys.
Diamond Knight: At least profanity is your worst problems from bad fan behavior. Back in Argentina before Milei, it's straight up mass violence.
Super C: You also got the Mavericks (NBA) and Stars (NHL); yet I never heard of people behaving like this at those games. Maybe I wasn't paying attention.
Cripto: Swoop (Eagles mascot) said he's doing the same thing as Toro, and he's getting Franklin and Hip Hop (76ers) to assist him.
Cripto: Swoop (Eagles mascot) said he's doing the same thing as Toro, and he's getting Franklin and Hip Hop (76ers) to assist him.
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