"Don't Ever Wish You Were Someone Else, Sweetpea"
“F’ik?”
“Yeah?” He looked down at her. She was biting her lower lip, obviously in thought.
“Why do I got a stinger? Why don’t you? Or anybody else? Why’s Atta not got one? Atta’s a pri’sess too.” She was looking up at him with that intense curiosity only young children can achieve, but he could see the sadness still hiding behind it. It was a fair question.
And one that he had no idea how to answer. Well, he’d start with what he knew.
“Well…” He thought about what to say. “You do know you’re not from Amberhive, right? You are a… different kind of ant.”
She nodded. She knew. He knew she knew. He was just delaying, and she knew it.
“Was it real?” She leaned in closer, her little face almost touching his. “Was… was the glass real? And… and the people. And the- The… spider?”
Well now he REALLY didn’t know how to answer. He knew Atta and the Queen hadn’t told Dot all the gruesome details of her arrival, not wanting to scare her.
But it was too late now. Even if he said ‘no’, he knew Dot was smart enough to see through the obvious lie. She knew the truth, she just wanted to hear it. Hear it from someone she trusted.
“Yeah, sweetpea. It’s all true. I was…”
He was what? There were so many things he longed to tell her, but couldn't. Wouldn't.
“I was the one who heard you crying.”
“I was the one who spotted the spider carrying you off.”
“I was the one who came up with the plan to distract it.”
“I was the one who caught you when it ran off, dropping you from its pedipalps.”
“I was the one who carried you back into Amberhive.”
And… The one thing he wanted to tell her above all else. The one thing he could never tell her.
“I was almost your daddy. I was almost yours, sweetpea. I could have taken you in, adopted you for myself, raised you as my own… But the queen said ‘no’, and took you. All because of your wings.”
He swallowed. No. No, he could never tell her that. Not after telling her to never wish to be someone else. He wouldn't deny her the life she had been given just for his own wants, even in his wishes. There really was only one thing he could - and would - tell her.
“I was… there.”
It felt so hollow. But it was true.
And to her, it was the most important truth. He was there. He had been there right from the start. Anything else was just set dressing.
He was there. For her.
And she just now was finding that out.
“You was?”
He smiled at her grammar, and nodded.
“I was. You're a lucky little ant, sweetpea. And we're luckier still to have you.”
And for just a brief moment, his world turned bright..
He saw her smile.
But it quickly faded. Something was still troubling her.
“If the story's all real, then… am I-”
“No.”
He cut her off. He wasn't going to let her go down that path again. He wouldn't let her do that to herself.
“No, sweetpea. You're an ant. You're not a wasp, or a spider, or a scorpion, or whatever else those little… little creeps, said you were. You're an ant. Just like your mom, just like Atta, just like anybody else here.”
“Just like you?”
“Just like me.” he nodded, “but sillier.” And he gave her nose a light boop.
And again, he was rewarded with just the smallest giggle. Much better.
“Even if you were any of those things, it wouldn't matter one tiny bit, sweetpea, because you know why?”
“Why?” she asked with a tilt of her head.
“Because you'd still be you, and that's what matters.”
He adjusted his grip on her, letting her sit up and face him. He finally had an answer to her question.
“Dot… I don’t know why you have a stinger. I don’t know why some ants have one, and some don’t. I don’t know why we’re not all just the same, just all one way or the other… But I know this.”
He held out his hands, and she took them, letting him hold them in a gentle grip.
“We don’t get to choose who we are in this life. We don’t get to pick out what we are, or what we’re like, or what we have. But we do get to choose what we do with all that stuff, alright? Just because you’ve got a stinger doesn’t mean you have to hurt anybody, sweetpea. That’s all up to you, and I think I know what you’ll choose.”
From a fanfic of mine: https://www.deviantart.com/theowlgo.....ing-1042490011
“Yeah?” He looked down at her. She was biting her lower lip, obviously in thought.
“Why do I got a stinger? Why don’t you? Or anybody else? Why’s Atta not got one? Atta’s a pri’sess too.” She was looking up at him with that intense curiosity only young children can achieve, but he could see the sadness still hiding behind it. It was a fair question.
And one that he had no idea how to answer. Well, he’d start with what he knew.
“Well…” He thought about what to say. “You do know you’re not from Amberhive, right? You are a… different kind of ant.”
She nodded. She knew. He knew she knew. He was just delaying, and she knew it.
“Was it real?” She leaned in closer, her little face almost touching his. “Was… was the glass real? And… and the people. And the- The… spider?”
Well now he REALLY didn’t know how to answer. He knew Atta and the Queen hadn’t told Dot all the gruesome details of her arrival, not wanting to scare her.
But it was too late now. Even if he said ‘no’, he knew Dot was smart enough to see through the obvious lie. She knew the truth, she just wanted to hear it. Hear it from someone she trusted.
“Yeah, sweetpea. It’s all true. I was…”
He was what? There were so many things he longed to tell her, but couldn't. Wouldn't.
“I was the one who heard you crying.”
“I was the one who spotted the spider carrying you off.”
“I was the one who came up with the plan to distract it.”
“I was the one who caught you when it ran off, dropping you from its pedipalps.”
“I was the one who carried you back into Amberhive.”
And… The one thing he wanted to tell her above all else. The one thing he could never tell her.
“I was almost your daddy. I was almost yours, sweetpea. I could have taken you in, adopted you for myself, raised you as my own… But the queen said ‘no’, and took you. All because of your wings.”
He swallowed. No. No, he could never tell her that. Not after telling her to never wish to be someone else. He wouldn't deny her the life she had been given just for his own wants, even in his wishes. There really was only one thing he could - and would - tell her.
“I was… there.”
It felt so hollow. But it was true.
And to her, it was the most important truth. He was there. He had been there right from the start. Anything else was just set dressing.
He was there. For her.
And she just now was finding that out.
“You was?”
He smiled at her grammar, and nodded.
“I was. You're a lucky little ant, sweetpea. And we're luckier still to have you.”
And for just a brief moment, his world turned bright..
He saw her smile.
But it quickly faded. Something was still troubling her.
“If the story's all real, then… am I-”
“No.”
He cut her off. He wasn't going to let her go down that path again. He wouldn't let her do that to herself.
“No, sweetpea. You're an ant. You're not a wasp, or a spider, or a scorpion, or whatever else those little… little creeps, said you were. You're an ant. Just like your mom, just like Atta, just like anybody else here.”
“Just like you?”
“Just like me.” he nodded, “but sillier.” And he gave her nose a light boop.
And again, he was rewarded with just the smallest giggle. Much better.
“Even if you were any of those things, it wouldn't matter one tiny bit, sweetpea, because you know why?”
“Why?” she asked with a tilt of her head.
“Because you'd still be you, and that's what matters.”
He adjusted his grip on her, letting her sit up and face him. He finally had an answer to her question.
“Dot… I don’t know why you have a stinger. I don’t know why some ants have one, and some don’t. I don’t know why we’re not all just the same, just all one way or the other… But I know this.”
He held out his hands, and she took them, letting him hold them in a gentle grip.
“We don’t get to choose who we are in this life. We don’t get to pick out what we are, or what we’re like, or what we have. But we do get to choose what we do with all that stuff, alright? Just because you’ve got a stinger doesn’t mean you have to hurt anybody, sweetpea. That’s all up to you, and I think I know what you’ll choose.”
From a fanfic of mine: https://www.deviantart.com/theowlgo.....ing-1042490011
Category Artwork (Digital) / Fanart
Species Insect (Other)
Gender Multiple characters
Size 1919 x 1919px
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